


What Binds the Soul

by sniperct



Series: Artifacts [4]
Category: Tomb Raider & Related Fandoms, Tomb Raider (Video Game)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Adventure, F/F, Femslash, Magical Artifacts, Mystery, Plot First; Romance Third, Romance, Supernatural - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2018-01-12 17:29:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 27
Words: 90,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1193628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sniperct/pseuds/sniperct
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It started on Yamatai, and continues to haunt Sam and Lara. Himiko stirs inside of Sam and Lara searches for more answers to the questions posed by her growing collection of powerful artifacts. Can she shake the legacy of her father and create her own? And what happens if all that power gets unleashed at once? Conclusion to the story of In This Together and Scars!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Girl Who Asked For a Star

**Prologue**

**Sam’s Journal**

**April 3rd**

_Lara looked so hot at the wedding and I forgot how to brain until we were supposed to say our vows. I’m pretty sure I stumbled through them but Lara’s eyes were like this beacon. A lighthouse helping me through the jumble of emotions that was overwhelming me. She was the best thing of the day. But mom and dad being there was a close second because I never in all my life thought I’d see them there. I still don’t know if they approve. I know Lara’s talked to them, but I can’t imagine what she said. They haven’t made up for years of neglect but they’re trying and that’s better than nothing. I’m not sure dad approves. But he was there. He gave me away. Might be the only time he ever did anything right for me._

**April 5th**

_She’s waiting. I can feel her in the back of my mind. Himiko is patient. She’s already waited a thousand years, she can wait a little longer. I can’t tell Lara. Not now, especially not now. I probably shouldn’t have picked Japan for a honeymoon but it had seemed like a good idea at the time. But right now, I can’t sleep. If I sleep, she’ll try to claw out and take over again. I told Lara I have control over this but now I’m scared. What happens to me if Himiko wins? What happens to Lara?_

**1 - The Girl Who Asked for a Star**

Like I promised Lara, our honeymoon is chosen to appeal to both of us. A lot of our interests cross over, but I definitely like dancing and clubbing more than she does. She still lets me drag her out and we have a good time, so I dutifully follow her around to really old places and museums. Not that I don’t enjoy it. She’s the one that sparked my interest in ancient things, especially my own culture. I would be a pretty shallow person without her, and if you ask certain people I still am, but they don’t matter. Lara matters.

So. I picked Japan, which is an odd choice considering how things were the last time we were here, but it’s kind of a gigantic fuck you to all of that. 

Two whole weeks and I reserve the first three days for Tokyo. You’d need three thousand days to really see all of that city, but we’ll have to make do in three. There’s a lot for us to see. Lara drags me around to a half-dozen shrines and museums on the first day alone, and at night we dance and carry on and drink a little too much. We get back to the hotel really late. She even picks me up and carries me in, but we don’t sleep. Oh my god we don’t sleep.

And I’m exhausted and a little bit tipsy but it’s our wedding night. It feels like the first time again. A little clumsy and lots of giggling. Our scars tell the story of how we lost our innocence. Lara more so than me. But for a night we act like we’re still innocent and I even feel it. Young and stupid and in love.

The next two days are pretty much the same only by now the tabloids are on to us and we have to dodge them. The daughter of a Japanese media mogul and the famous (or infamous if you ask certain people) Lara Croft lesbianing it up. On a _honeymoon_. Oh the humanity! A couple of Japanese talk shows tried to book us but we’re not going to do publicity on our honeymoon. Lara was relieved when I turned them down. I want her to myself and I have every right to it. She says there’s a Damocles sword hanging over our heads but we can’t let that get to us. We earned a respite from the world that lays hidden beneath the cynical lens of modern life. I totally use that line in our vacation footage, too.

Our fourth day we’re up early because we want to sneak out before we’re noticed. It’s easier said than done but this is Lara Croft and she’s kind of like a ninja. She makes me wait upstairs while she carries our luggage down to the car we rented, and then I expect her to carry me down too but she disappoints me. I even pout at her the whole way to the car and she just rolls her eyes at me. As revenge, I stomp as I follow her and by the time we’re there she’s trying not to laugh. She pins me against the car door and I grin into her eyes. “You should have carried me. We would have been a lot quieter.”

“Is that why you were stomping around like Godzilla?” Her hand presses against my cheek and I nuzzle it. It’s times like these when the rest of the world falls away. I like these feelings. They’re not as fleeting as I was always scared they would be. When I’m the center of her world and she looks at me with hungry adoration.

My grin probably turns cheeky. “Yes.” I rest my left hand against her chest. Her jade pendant dangles from a leather thong around her neck and she’s hung her wedding ring there as well. I’m not bothered by it. A ring can get in the way for someone whose career will be spent digging and climbing. The ring and band on my finger glitter and I giggle to myself before she quiets me with her lips.

“Where to next, Sam?”

I have a surprise for our fourth night. We aren’t going to leave Tokyo just yet. Lara of course suspects nothing as I help her navigate through the traffic. The closer we get the more giddy I feel and I have a hard time not bouncing in my seat. Lara eyes me without moving her head from the road and I can picture the gears in her head turning as she tries to figure out what I’m up to. We park and then get out. I grin at her over the roof of the car. “We’ll just need our backpacks and a change of clothing. And the special bag.”

She blushes at the mention of the ‘special’ bag, but grabs it anyway. It isn’t until we’re in the lobby that she realizes what this place is. Lara freezes, looking around, alarm on her face. She grabs my arm and hisses, “Sam! do you know what this place _is?!_ ”

I glance at her. She looks like she wants to melt into the floor and fidgets nervously as I unlatch her fingers from my arm. It’s like we just walked into some forbidden vault filled with horrors of the most obscene sort. Which is sorta kinda true. I kiss her fingers. “Of course, sweetie. I booked us a whole night in a love hotel. Now, do you want the Magical Girl room or should we get the Moon Fantasia room?”

And then, just to sweeten the pot, I whisper into her ear, “I brought a school girl costume.”

We wind up with the Magical Girl room. Except for temporarily losing the keys to the handcuffs the night is really amazing. Lara looks relieved when we leave the next morning, though, because she floors it to get away from that hotel. I take her hand in the car and smirk to myself. She probably thinks I’m being smug. She’s right. 

It takes forever to get out of the city but I occupy myself with my camera and keep up a running commentary of the the scenery we pass. Lara only gets a vague set of directions. I want her to be surprised when we pull up to the ryokan I’d reserved a room in. It’s supposed to be really beautiful and we’re in cherry blossom season, too. It’s not entirely accidental timing, I had really wanted this time of year just for that and Lara probably guessed the destination. If she did, she never let on. I think it’s romantic and I just hope that my wife feels the same way. Not that I’ll ever get used to saying that or thinking that. I’m not sure I want to. Wife. It feels special. Special and awesome.

She needs to be distracted a lot. Not all the time and not too much, I think. But after we got back from Egypt and had some time to decompress I realized that she was getting sucked into this artifact thing, and I was going to lose her if I didn’t pull her head out of it and force her to look at the rest of the world. She wants to find a way to save me again. Either from Yamatai and Himiko and the power the Queen left inside me or from the artifacts we’ve been hunting. It doesn’t really matter. I don’t need her to save me, I just need her to love me. Love isn’t always enough, it can’t feed you or anything but it can turn a shitty day into something magical.

Lara’s mouth is hanging open as we get out of the car. Seeing the blossoms in pictures is really different than seeing them in person and we’ve never been to Japan during the right season before. They’re all around us, gloriously and unashamedly pink. I find a handful of fallen petals and start placing them into Lara’s hair.

“This is beautiful.” She tucks a petal behind my ear. Our hands find each other and our fingers thread together. It’s a familiar instinctual motion, by now. Thoughts about artifacts fade away, and Himiko is distant and forgotten.

Our room has a view down into a valley. There’s a river or stream that meanders around and I just know we’ll end up hiking along it. I can see the gleam in Lara’s eyes at the idea of discovery. Maybe discovered by other people before but still new to her. I love that about her. As much as she’s about discovering things no one has ever seen before, she still wants to experience things new to _her_. Regardless of how many people might have gone to see where that stream leads.

We’re going to be here four days before moving further into the country, so I unpack and get everything neat and settled. I’m starving, too, but Lara suddenly drags me out of our room and onto a little trail that leads down into the valley. “Lara! I’m hungry. Can we eat first?”

She hands me an energy bar and I just look at her. “Yeah, like granola is romantic.” She glances back at me and gives me this sheepish look so I forgive her. I won’t let her forget this later, but I forgive her.

It’s mid-afternoon and there’s a light breeze rustling all the blossoms as we walk hand in hand upstream. The stream is bigger than it looks from a distance, about ten feet from one side to the other and a couple of feet deep. Not really a river, but definitely not a brook. There’s a bridge, and we stop on it, leaning on a railing just letting the peace wash over us. I’m a city girl. I’ll always be one, but right now I don’t want to go anywhere. My eyes are closed, and the sound of the water and the breeze in the petals around us is the only thing I can hear. 

Lara is next to me. She’s a warm, steady presence. This place is probably fascinating to her. The ryokan is hundreds of years old and the history in this valley probably stretches back farther than that. Yet when I open my eyes, Lara is looking at me. Not the vista, or the sky or the river under our feet. A bolt runs down my spine and my stomach grows warm. “Hi?”

My wife has a smile for a variety of occasions and right now she has the dorky one. It’s a little goofy and innocent and entirely one-hundred percent genuine. It’s her ‘I love you Sam’ smile. I used to wonder what it meant. Now I know, and I love it even more.

“If you’re still hungry we should head back,” Lara says. I nearly miss it because I’m distracted by a wisp of hair that’s fallen across her face. 

“I’m thinking I want dessert first.” The thought of us sprawled out in a bed of cherry blossoms bounces around my mind. I want the idea so badly that I tug on her hand. “It would be really romantic.” I kind of try to hint with a nod of my head away from the bridge and towards the trees.

I’m so dumbfounded when she says ‘okay’ that I let her lead me off the bridge. We get cherry blossoms in hard to explain places but it's memorable.

Dinner that night is traditional. I haven’t had a traditional Japanese dinner in about twelve years. My dad was always too busy so it was a rare and usually bittersweet occasion for me. My feelings for him might have softened but it takes an understanding look from Lara before I can relax.

Our host is this elderly woman named Natsumi Kimura. She looks every one of her ninety years. Her face is wrinkled and craggy, topped by a snowcap of pure white hair. It’s unruly, going in every which direction, as though she decided she was too old to care what anyone thought about her hair. She grew up here, and she has a hundred stories about the weird and sometimes wild things she’s seen. Lara is a little enraptured by Ms. Kimura. I’m just happy she doesn’t want to throw us out for being a couple. Maybe it’s the fact that Lara’s Japanese is good enough to spare the poor woman from trying to speak in English.

The most interesting story she tells is a very personal one. There’s a lot of emotion in her face. It’s a happy memory, but I can hear a note of bittersweet behind it.

It happened about seventy-five years ago. She was just a teenager, living here with her sister Nanako and their best friend. The _pain_ in her voice when she says the girl’s name breaks my heart. _Setsuko_. Lara catches my eye and we share a glance before giving Ms. Kimura our full attention.

The three used to sit on the roof and watch the stars. They were close. As close as Lara and me, and did just about everything together. Ms. Kimura tells us about a time that they tricked the village boys into thinking there was a forest spirit on the loose. The boys came back with a dozen different captured ‘spirits’ but night after night, the spirit struck. The spirit disappeared when the girls got bored with the game.

Our hostess sobers up a little, and rests her palms on the table. Her voice sounds as old as the rest of her, and much more frail than it had just moments ago. It’s probably a little harder for Lara to follow the language. “I was sixteen and promised to a boy. Setsuko crawled into my bed one night. We did this often. We were young and she was like a sister. But her face...oh she looked so _anguished_. I asked her ‘What is wrong?’ and she asked me ‘What could I do to make you love me the way I love you.’ I was...stunned. I searched her face for the joke or the mockery. We were girls. We were friends. You just didn’t _love_ your friend that way. But her heartbreak was sincere, and I just did not know if I felt the same way.”

The old woman swallows, dabbing at her eyes with a cloth. She’s not the only one. I wipe my own with the back of my hand. Lara is stoic next to me. We both understand that fear of rejection that Setsuko must have felt.

“But I thought…I thought that perhaps she was joking, so I gave her an impossible task. I told her I wanted one of the stars we spent so much time admiring. And part of me wondered if I could love her if she succeeded.”

Lara grips my hand under the table so tightly it hurts, but I don’t say anything about it. Ms. Kiruma continues, after another moment to compose herself. Her voice wavers and if I didn’t want to hear the rest of this so badly I would make her stop. “She looked so determined, my Setsuko. She kissed me. Just the barest of touches, a whispered promise. My first kiss. My sweetest kiss. “ Her voice starts to give, and she makes a little choked sound. I open my mouth to ask if she’s okay but she waves her hand. “I must finish. I must. When I woke, she was gone, and the bed was cold beside me. I could not _find_ her. I searched, and I searched. It had snowed overnight, but I found her footprints and I followed them. I followed them to the stream, and I found her on the bridge.”

Her voice finally breaks, “And she was as pale as the snow she lay in, as the snow she was named for. She was _gone_ and I _loved_ her. She was gone because I had sent her away, because I had been _afraid_. She was gone, she _is_ gone….because of me.“

I get up and step around the table, wrapping my arms around her shoulders. She feels so light, her bones brittle and fragile like a bird’s, so I’m careful to not squeeze so hard. “No. No. Not because of you. It was a tragedy, but it wasn’t your fault.”

“Yes, or no. It does not matter. What matters is you.” She places a hand on my arm, and her other on Lara’s. “ _You found each other._ It is beautiful. I have been alone my whole life, haunted by something I cannot change. But you have each other, and it warms my heart.”

Her story breaks my own. It’s raw and painful and so full of truth that later that night I cling to Lara, afraid to let go. My face is pillowed against her breast and her fingers trace patterns in my back. I don’t want that to be us. I’m so grateful it’s not. “Promise me you won’t go chasing after stars, Lara.”

A sound comes out of her throat, wordless and rumbly. I lift my head to look at her and her eyes are watery. She shakes her head. “I’m not going to chase false dreams, Sam. I already have my star.” I straddle her and continue this conversation with my lips on hers.

Our kiss heats up quickly from the weight of our emotions. I’m going to claim her, but something rattles and I look around. “Did you hear that?” It rattles again and now we’re both sitting up in bed. The lamp lifts into the air and instead of freaking out the only thing that comes out of my mouth is, “Really? _Really_?”

The lamp drops back down with a clatter and I look at Lara. She has a curious look in her eyes. I know that look. That’s the look of ‘we’re going to get to the bottom of this.’ That’s the look that spells trouble.

I open my mouth, thinking that I’m going to at least try to protest anything that involves leaving this nice warm bed when the lamp flings through the air and nearly hits Lara in the head. “Okay someone doesn’t like us.”

“I don’t know Sam, in some cultures, lampthrowing is a sign of affection.”

I smack her in the arm and roll out of bed. Lara follows me, and hugs me from behind, kissing my shoulder. The room grows suddenly colder, and there’s a light outside the window. We run to it and peer out. Footprints lead away into the darkness of the valley and I don’t have to look at Lara to know what she’s thinking. We dress quickly and warmly, and with flashlights in hand start walking through the snow following the footprints. I don’t think they’re Ms. Kimura’s. She’s still in her room, I’m pretty sure. Plus I think they’re a little too small, but she’s a frail old lady so maybe her feet are this small. They’re actually not much smaller than mine, though Lara’s footprints are huge in comparison. I giggle.

“What?” She stops and turns to look at me.

“Oh. Oh nothing, I just...your feet are kind of big, sweetie. It’s those boots.”

She sounds a little put out. “I _like_ my boots, Sam. They’re practical. And if I recall, _you_ gave them your stamp of fashion approval.”

That’s true. I’d even picked them out for her. It’s kind of a birthday tradition. They’re rugged fashionable, but also really tough and practical. I might sometimes let myself geek out over having this rugged outdoorsy, tough as nails girlfriend. Person. Wife. And knowing that she’s so sweet and considerate and shy underneath it all just makes me even happier.

Her hand finds mine and we walk along in silence for another ten minutes before the footprints lead us into a cave. It’s warm inside, like there’s a fire lit somewhere, but I can’t see one. Aren’t ghostly places usually cold?

Lara spots a shrine, and we approach it cautiously. It might not be fair to call it a shrine. It’s really just a statue of a woman with a candle lit in front of it. The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. 

My wife lifts a hand to the statue and touches it. “This isn’t that old. Less than a hundred years. The woman it depicts is young too. I _think_ this is Setsuko.”

Then this wasn’t a shrine so much as a memorial. That relaxes me immediately. It also makes me feel pretty sad. “That’s such a sad story. Where do you think she was headed when she died? Did she really think she could get Ms. Kimura a star?”

Frowning, Lara presses her palm against the statue, then takes my hand and press it against the statue, too. The stone is warm, and there’s a buzzing feeling that sets my bones on edge. I feel Himiko stir, just a little, and yank my hand back. “She’s...this is…”

Lara looks into the statue’s face, her tone resigned. “Setsuko is tied to this statue. She’s trapped.”

“Do you think we can free her? Break it open?” I start to look around for something we can use to smash the thing. Lara grabs my hand.

“No, we can’t. We don’t know what will happen to her soul. We could destroy her. Or turn her into one of the shadow puppets.” 

_That_ makes me pause. “This thing is too big to move…”

“I don’t think it’s the same as the others. But there’s a way to transfer power from one vessel to another, Sam. So maybe there’s a way to free her.” Lara starts to lead me out of the cave, and I have the distinct impression we’re being watched.

I turn at the entrance of the cave and speak in Japanese, “I don’t know why you tried to get our attention, but we know your story and we’re going to help. We’ll find a way to free you. And you can move on and be there when Natsumi passes on. I promise.”

I’m a Croft now. We keep our promises.


	2. Footprints in the Snow

Crofts keep their promises, but I don’t know how we’re going to keep Sam’s. The story of Natsumi and Setsuko sticks with me for the rest of our honeymoon. I put it out of my mind when I can and try to enjoy myself. I try to take Natsumi’s words to heart. Sam and I have each other, and we don’t have to spend our lives wondering what might have been, like the old woman must have done. It’s not easy and more than once Sam calls me out on it. I try to hedge exactly once but that woman never could take no for an answer.

“You can’t dwell on the past,” she tells me, drawing my eyes from the bullet train’s window as we sped back towards Tokyo.

I shake my head and smile at her, trying to be reassuring. “We have a lot of good memories of our honeymoon, Sam. And one bittersweet one.” It is like a salve over the fevered days after Yamatai. That either of us can look at Japan again with anything other than trepidation and trauma is a miracle in and of itself. I’m profoundly grateful to Sam that she chose her father’s country for our honeymoon. I tell her that, and I tell her why, and her face lights up like the sun. The shadows that constantly creep in around us are chased away.

But the closer we get to Tokyo and the airport, the more that I know our respite from the world of magical artifacts and Nathaniel Shaw is at an end.

“I’m not ready to go back to London yet.” Sam’s reply is not what I’m expecting and it gets my full attention.

“What do you mean? We can’t stay on holiday forever, as nice as that would be.”

An amused look crosses her face as she rolls her eyes at me. Sam’s facial expressions are some of my favorite things but right now I just want her to get on with it.

“I don’t know. Like can we take the long way home? A day trip in Beijing, maybe visit an old temple in Tibet…” She fidgets one hand up and down her arm, as if trying to rub away the marks that only we can see there.

“Shouldn’t I be the one suggesting the archaeological side-trip? Or have I finally rubbed off on you?”

Sam looks back at me and I put a hand over her mouth before she can make a perverted joke out of my ill-chosen words! “Okay, I don’t have anything I need to do back home for a few weeks yet anyway. We’ll make a list and a flight plan. I wouldn’t mind a detour into India, either.”

“Oh my god that would be awesome. They have some _beautiful_ clothes!”

I never thought I’d see the day when I’d be happy to listen to Sam gush about clothing, but I am and I do for the rest of the trip to the airport. She hasn’t been this lit up in a long time and it’s a relief no matter what the reason.

There’s a delay at the airport due to the weather, and I keep an eye on Sam while we wait for it to clear up enough to take off. She has her earphones on and her face plastered to the window so I can’t tell if she’s thinking what I’m afraid she’s thinking of. I pull my own phone out. The earbuds are brand new, and pink because I missed my old ones. Who knew I’d ever want pink anything? But it brings a level of comfort I sometimes still sorely need.

Taking Sam’s hand, I squeeze it gently. She looks at me, then rolls her eyes as if guessing at what I’m thinking. I interject before she can say anything. “Sam, I’m not…”

“I’m not going to do anything, god. Not if our lives aren’t in danger. Trust me.” A small comfort, really. Her eyes are pleading and I nod. Trust her. I’d promised her I would. Sighing, I settle into my seat and close my eyes. We eventually do take off, and the flight is uneventful. Sam uses the wifi to secure a hotel room for when we land, and I use it to make a checklist of everything we can possibly see in the short time we’ll have. It’s not going to be enough time at all. There’s never enough time to see everything. It’s a little depressing but I try to make do.

We move around the city so fast that I know I'm going to need to view Sam's footage later just to remember most of it. I'm exhausted from the whirlwind tour of historical sites, but neither Sam nor I are in the mood to turn in just yet. I only wish I had weeks to explore in detail. Years if I tried to visit other parts of this country. It's a problem I have no matter where we visit. Too bad I can't clone myself, but the thought makes me shiver. As much as Sam would love it the world doesn't need two Lara Crofts.

The night belongs to Sam. We hit four bars and three dance clubs. It's in the last that I have the distinct impression I'm being watched. Not in the way where we get stared at for dancing so closely, but in the way that makes me reach for a gun that isn't there.

Try as I might, I can't see anyone.

"Is something wrong?" Sam's lips brush my ear.

I turn to look at her and shake my head with a laugh. "Drink is starting to get to me."

She gives me a wicked look, and I know I'm in for it. She pulls me up to the roof of the club, but I push her against the side of the building as we snog. Sam's leg is around my waist and my leg is between hers. I can feel how hot she is for me and that switch in my head flicks on. I pin her wrists above her head and Sam’s whimper kindles a fire inside me.

I'm thoroughly embarrassed as we descend back into the club. That presence is gone, for which I'm relieved. Sam can barely stand and doesn't bother to hide her disheveled state, so I tug her into a cab as soon as I can. 

We have an early flight but it's so late I don't bother trying to sleep. In the light of the hotel room I can see the bruises on Sam's wrists and the bite marks on her throat. My heart sinks into my shoes. I take her hand and stroke her skin gently. Her wrist is a little rough - it has been since Yamatai and the binding ropes had left its scars, but the bruises are noticeable. I'd gotten too rough and my voice sticks in my throat.

She grins at me and butts her head against my cheek. "You're amazing."

"I'm sorry I hurt you..."

Looking at her wrist, Sam shakes her head. "Badge of honor."

"I _don't_ want to be the kind of person who gets rough with you. You're too special for that. And you're so pissed right now that I feel like I took advantage of you..." I'm going over other encounters of ours in my head. I start to say more but she pokes me in the chest.

"Lara...Lara...sweetie. You’re not...roughing me up or anything. I mean I’m okay. I’m okay with the roughness. ‘Cuz there’s a part of you that’s rough and I love that part, but there’s also the gentle sweet tender Lara that...mmmm…” She trails off for a moment, before snapping back into focus. “Besides...you should see what I did to your ass before you pinned me.”

I twist around, and sure enough there's a red handprint right on my bum. I turn the color of Sam's dress. I still feel a little guilty, but we can talk about it when we’re both sober. I glance back at her and she’s smiling sweetly and dazedly. “I love you and all your rough edges.”

Our flight nearly leaves without us, but we manage to board in time. My hangover can’t be as bad as Sam, but in daylight her wrists look fine. There’s still the marking of my teeth on her shoulder, and when she notices me staring at it she gives me a smile and strokes my cheek, saying only, “Yes, I’m yours. You claimed me. It’s awesome.” Her voice is quiet, so respecting her hangover I just grin back at her. If I ever cross a line, I can trust her to tell me.

We sleep on the plane, her head on my shoulder and my cheek buried into her hair. My dreams are filled with snow, and I can hear a voice calling in the distance. But I can’t reach it. The snow is too deep, and the wind too strong. It starts to snow, the sky turning white and I try to push through the blizzard, my limbs growing heavier and heavier until I'm no longer able to move. I wake as the storm starts to bury me and it takes me a full minute to recognize my surroundings. 

“Lara? Are you okay? You’re sweating.” Sam puts her hand on my forehead and I smile in return. It isn’t the worse dream I ever had. I wonder if the voice that called had been Setsuko, or if it was someone else. I don’t know the answer.

“I’m okay. Just had a really strange dream. I was trudging through a blizzard, and the snow got deeper and deeper until I was buried.” I straighten a crick in my neck and peer out the window past Sam’s face. The view is breathtaking. Mountains buried in snow, their peaks sticking out of the clouds like islands at sea. The air is so clear up here that we can see for an eternity. I wonder what mysteries we can uncover on those frosty slopes.

“Try not to jump out the window or anything,” Sam tells me as she playfully pushes me back into my seat. I had leaned past her to get a better view, so I probably deserved it. “Pilot said we’ve got another hour before we land.”

“What time is the flight?” I doubt there were very many nightclubs, but I’ve been surprised before.

“One PM. Day after tomorrow. I wanted to give us a chance to either sleep in, or get up early and explore some more. This one is all you, sweetie.” She turns her tablet so I could see it better. Sam is amazing, and knows me perfectly. “I marked the places I think you’ll want to see most, that we can actually see in a day.”

I have to give Sam credit. She picked perfectly. I decide to only visit a few of the monasteries in Lhasa. That way I can take my time and enjoy the experience rather than feel rushed like I was in Beijing. China is a country I plan on making return visits to.

By the time we get to our hotel, I’m wide awake. It’s barely noon, local time. Sam looks like she’s ready to collapse into bed, so I give her a little shove in that direction. She flips me off after she teeters face first onto the mattress. I sit next to her, giving her bum a thwap. “I’m going to go for a jog. Do you think you’ll be okay here alone?”

“Brains.”

“That’s a yes. I’ll bring you back supper.” 

Lhasa is beautiful. I’m not even twenty-five yet and I’ve seen some of the most awe-inspiring places on earth, many of which haven’t had living eyes on them in centuries. It’s a good feeling, but I’m not sure it’s one I deserve. In the time since I’d convinced Roth to take us into the Dragon’s Triangle, I’ve killed scores of men. I’ve watched people - some of them very close to me - die. Because of me, Sam is a killer too. I don’t deserve to feel proud of my accomplishments. Yet I do anyway. Maybe I’m only human, and maybe I don't want that island to win.

Starting out at a brisk walk, I get a feel for the city. It feels like one in transition. I remember reading about the Chinese tearing down a lot of the old Buddhist buildings and religious sites and turning it into a tourist town. It’s pretty obvious that’s exactly what they’ve been doing and it’s really depressing. It’s not the first city this has happened to, either. Two cities in China proper have already had this make-over. My blood boils and I increase my pace to a jog. The destruction of so much history and for something so transient as tourism dollars just hits me right in the chest.

After about half an hour, as the sweat stains my shirt and my legs start the familiar bun, I sense someone following me. It’s subtle, and it takes me another five minutes of running to be sure, but somewhere in the bustle around me, there’s a person who is good enough to follow me without me being able to tell where they are.

Slowing down, I make my way into a little corner food stand. I’m hungry and the pretense of eating might give me a chance to catch my follower in the act. I’m funneling some laping noodles into my mouth when I think about Sam. She’s alone back in the hotel room. I don’t want to give away my thoughts so I eat a little more slowly before I pull my phone out. I casually text Sam, then look around surreptitiously. 

She texts me back a moment later. I tell her about being followed and to get dressed and stay put. Her response is a frownie face. I roll my eyes and put the phone away. It’s time to see if I can lure my mysterious follower out. There’s an alley nearby that I cut through, and then as soon as I’m clear I scale up the wall and perch on the edge of a roof. Sure enough, a figure walks down below me. It pauses and looks around.

I land next to the person and slam them against the wall, my forearm at their throat. Her throat. The girl stares at me with wide brown eyes. She’s wearing rags and her frame is slight and she’s clearly underfed. I pull away immediately. “I’m so sorry! Are you all right? Why were you following me?”

The girl shakes her head, holding up her hands at me, palms out. She clearly doesn’t mean any harm and I curse myself bitterly for my paranoia. The girl can’t be any older than eleven or twelve. I hold my own hands out. “It’s okay. Are you hungry? Let me buy you some food.”

Shaking her head, the girl pulls out a pouch. I watch her curiously as she opens it. It’s a small figurine made from a white stone and carved into a wolf. It’s not native to Tibet. It’s origin is thousands of miles away, and when she presses it into my palm I can feel the buzzing of power within. She closes my fingers around it. Her smile is warm. Her english is surprisingly good. “It’s a key. That’s all I know.”

“A key to what?” I grab her arm before she can run away. She’s so frail and small that I doubt she’s eaten well in a long time. I start to pull her back towards the street. My grip is too strong for her to get away, and I don’t even have to try that hard. “I’m buying you lunch, you’re so thin.” I stop at one of the street vendors to get more noodles, then take her to a place where we can sit and eat.

I tuck the figurine into my pocket and send Sam another message, telling her it’s a false alarm. She gives me another frownie face. The girl struggles a bit more then gives up when I make her sit. I try to be gentle. “What’s your name?”

She hesitates for a moment, looking around before digging into her food, as though she were afraid it would be taken from her. I won’t let that happen, but her worry is concerning. After a few bites she shakes her head and doesn’t answer.

“I can’t just call you girl,” I say, reaching over to put a hand on her shoulder. “I’m Lara.” Names in Tibetan culture are a pretty significant thing, and one can have several over the course of their lives. I just need to get her to trust me, especially after how I’d introduced myself.

“Dolma,” she says finally, after a moment’s thought. “My mother chose it.” From the tone of her voice this is very important to her. I give her a smile and let her finish eating before I ask my next question.

“Why did you give me that figurine? You said it’s a key, but why me?”

Dolma looks back down at her nearly empty bowl, and her voice is so quiet I nearly miss what she says. “It told me to look for a girl with the eyes of a wolf. That she would look familiar to me.”

I can feel the energy of the object in my pocket and grimace. “That does sound like me, much as I wish it weren’t so. Why am I familiar to you?” That the figurine told her anything isn’t a surprise at this point.

She shrugs a shoulder in a gesture that’s probably universal to children her age. “Your face. You remind me of someone.”

That sends a chill right down my spine. I dig my nails into my knees and look more closely at her. “Who do I remind you of?” I’m fairly sure that I don’t want to know the answer.

The girl turns her face towards me, her eyes studying mine. She holds my gaze without flinching. I’ve seen grown men twice my size flinch and this girl isn’t turning away. “When I was little, there was this man. He gave my mother the wolf. Your eyes are a different color and your face is softer, but you’re the same.”

My stomach starts turning around in circles and I’m glad I’m sitting, because I’m suddenly dizzy. I wait until the world stops spinning before I reply in a voice that’s much too shakey for my liking. “Do you know this man’s name?”

Dolma shakes her head. “My mother never told me before she died. I only know he went into the mountains and never came back.”

I look in the direction of the snowy crags and chew on my lower lip. My parents had disappeared on an expedition when I’d been barely this girl’s age. I pull the wolf out of my pocket and turn it over in my hands. None of this is a coincidence. As I hold it in my hands, I think about going into the mountains. Find my father and my mother and lay to rest the questions that have been nagging me for fifteen years. 

“It’s not time yet.” I snap out of it and look at Dolma. She’s studying me. This girl’s eyes are older than she is, and I can’t imagine what kind of life she’s led. 

I find my voice and ask, “Time for what?”

Her hand waves in the direction of the mountains, and the figurine in my hands pulsates, as though it concurs. It’s not an answer I’m happy with and I grit my teeth as I fight back every rebellious impulse I have. A lot of the answers I’ve been searching for are _out_ there. Once again I find myself reacting to supernatural events, and now it seems like there’s a _timeline_. 

“Right.” I shove my irritation down and get up. None of this is Dolma’s fault. At worse she’s just a messenger. A starving one at that. I need to take care of this before I decide what I'm going to do with this information. “Do you need a place to sleep tonight?”

She looks up at me shyly, then nods her head and gets up. I’m relieved because there’s no way I’ll be able to sleep knowing this girl doesn’t have a roof over her head. What had happened to her mother? “How long have you been on your own?”

“A couple of years, I don’t know.”

I nod at her. Her english is really good for being on her own like this. There’s more to that story and I just need to know what questions to ask. Dolma clams up after a little while, and I stop pushing her. I don’t know what I’m going to do about her, but I just can’t let her suffer on the street if there’s anything I can do to help. For whatever reason my father got her involved in our family bullshit and now I’m responsible. 

That night, I dream of the snow again, of trudging through a blizzard. This time Sam is with me. I’m pulling a sled while she huddles with Dolma on it. When I wake I don’t remember where we were heading. The only thing I’m sure of as I hold the wolf figurine and watch the sun rise through the window is that I’ll be coming back, sooner rather than later. That seems to appease it, but not me. Those mountains beckon.


	3. The Woman With the Scar

I really love how Lara manages to freak me out and then ten minutes later say everything is okay. As if that’ll calm me down and make me put my lampclub back where I’d found it. The ones in our room are heavy and useful for bludgeoning people to death, which Lara had jokingly noted when we’d first walked in. I hadn’t expected to need to put that to practical use! 

I’m in the process of of giving her a death glare as she walks in when she’s followed by this dark haired Tibetan girl. She’s maybe a little younger than I was when I first met Lara and my snarky comment dies in my throat. It had been a good one, too. The poor girl looks half-starved and I can’t blame Lara in the slightest for her compassion. I slip an arm around her waist as she calls to have some food delivered. But I still have some snark in me. “If this is your hint about kids, it’s noted.”

She shoots me a look and I give her my most darling smile. I’m leaning in to sneak a kiss when I realize the girl is gaping at us. She probably doesn’t see two women acting this close all that much around here, and I step back. I can sense Lara relax as I do so. Moving over to the bed I sit next to the girl. “I’m Sam, Lara’s...person.”

The girl gets this determined look in her face. “I’m Dolma. And neither of you need to do anything, I’m fine on my own.”

Oh there’s some serious stubborn pride there and I kind of like her. She reminds me of Lara and me. I wonder if I was that bad. Lara was. She still is. “Just because you don’t need anything doesn’t mean we don’t want to help. Trust me, Lara can outstubborn the both of us combined if she sets her mind to it. It’s better to just let her help.”

She sticks out her lower lip in a pout. That might work under other circumstances and it’s really hard not to waver under the power of it. I glance back up as Lara approaches, and wonder what she’s planning. We can’t exactly take the girl with us when we leave.

“Food will be here shortly.” She plants her hands on her hips and regards Dolma, studying her like she’s a particularly fascinating sculpture. “Do you have anyone? Any family or friends?”

The girl shakes her head and I feel my stomach tighten. I’ve only just started mending things with my parents. Sometimes I really do forget how lucky I am. This girl doesn’t even have a Roth. Maybe that’s it. I look at Lara again, really look at her. Roth did so much for her when he was the only thing she had left in the world and she wants to pay it forward.

My wife nods her head and returns to the phones. I wonder what she’s doing but when I move to ask she just shoots me a look and I shut my mouth. Okay then. Instead, I occupy my time asking Dolma questions about the city and the people she’s seen here, filming the whole time. She’s not very talkative, but I get a little bit out of her. 

Lara hangs up the phone, then comes over and sits next to us. “Sam, do you think you have something she can wear? I’ll take her shopping tomorrow but until then I think we can get her into something cleaner.”

“Yeah, I have a couple things!” I bounce up and start rooting through my bags. I find a t-shirt I usually sleep in and a pair of sweats. If Dolma ties them tight enough they should stay on her long enough to get her something in her size. “I mean if we gave her something of yours it’ll never fit!”

“I don’t know if that’s supposed to be an inappropriate joke or not,” Lara says. “But you should really refrain around Dolma.”

The girl rolls her eyes, and I giggle. “Lara, she’s not five. Remember that I lost my virginity at-”

“SAM!”

I give Dolma the clothing, still unable to stop the grin on my face. “Go change in the bathroom.”

When she’s gone, I turn to Lara. “How do you do this? You just find a kid in the middle of freaking Tibet and bring her home.”

“And she had this.” Lara pulls something out of her pocket. It’s some kind of carved wolf. I can feel it’s energy giving me the heebie jeebies almost immediately.

“What the hell is that?”

“A key,” Lara says, looking suddenly tired. “From my father.” 

“A kid, who by some miracle _knew your dad_?” This isn’t a door I want to open any time soon. I sit next to Lara and take her hand, trying to absorb this crazy coincidence. That’s how we’re sitting when Dolma comes in. She looks at us, then sits in one of the chairs and pulls her legs up.

“Did you know Amelia Croft, too?” I ask her, after there was a long silence. Dolma shakes her head. 

“Just the man.”

“How old were you when you met him?” I’m trying to figure out the math in my head because if the timing works out it would be around the time Lara’s parents vanished.

She shrugs, and I feel Lara shift in irritation next to me. So instead I say, “Okay, never mind. Food is almost here.”

We don’t get any more answers and we never end up visiting any of the places we’d planned on. Lara spends a lot of time making arrangements on the phone, too and by the time we’re flying out of Lhasa, Dolma has been set up with a small apartment, a cell phone, and a monthly allowance.

I take Lara’s hand as I watch her look out the window. I wonder if she would have done any of that if her family hadn’t been involved. I don’t have the heart to ask her, because I don’t want her to have to think about that. But knowing her, she asks herself the same question. Besides, I’ve got other questions on my mind.

“What is it, Sam?”

Her question startles me, and I take so long to answer that she looks at me. “Well…” I give her a shrug of my shoulders. “I was wondering how come we’re not knee-deep in snow right now. I’m not complaining. I don’t think we need to be chasing after wild geese right now.”

She holds up the little white figurine that Dolma had given her. “I’m not ready, I guess. I don’t think I want to know the answers, or what I’ll find. It’s been so many years, and I’m just not ready.”

There’s so much resignation in Lara’s voice that it hurts. I wonder how much is what she really feels or if it’s that damned wolf. It doesn’t sound quite like her and it’s just a teensy bit alarming. Lara should be chomping at the bit but she’s sitting there talking about not being ready. I take the figure from her and I can feel Himiko stirring inside me. She’s pacing around like a caged tiger and maybe this is how Lara feels all the time. Even a moment’s lapse and the monster comes out to bite you and everyone you care about.

Carefully, I put it away in Lara’s carry-on. Like water washing over me, my own personality reasserts itself and Himiko is gone. It seems like whenever I’m around one of these things my control over myself weakens. It’s terrifying and the last thing I can do is tell Lara about it. I can’t burden her with my existential bullshit.

“When it’s time, we’ll book the first flight out there. I promise you.”

Her tired smile buoys my spirits. “Well Sam, what’s next on our whistlestop tour of the ancient world?”

“I wasn’t sure if you were still in the mood for any of that. We spent an extra day in Lhasa, and this...whole thing with your dad.”

Her finger presses to my lips and she shakes her head. “I’m not going to change my life around for things like this. We’ll be back home eventually and then we can let the world back in, but until then I’m going to enjoy my honeymoon.”

Of course, her finger is in the perfect spot to start sucking on and I manage to distract us both for a couple of minutes. Her expression gradually lightens until there’s only laughter in her eyes. I can never get enough of it when Lara looks like that. It’s a look she reserves exclusively for me.

I don’t let Laura see our destination when we change planes and keep her distracted whenever the pilot mentions where we’re going. She finally puts her arms around my head until after the pilot announces half an hour to landing, and then lets go of me. “Rome!”

There’s a lot to do in Rome even when you have a week, so I’ve given us three days. That had been part of my plan all along, and even with the extra time in Tibet we’re still going to get the full stay. We’re barely settled into the hotel before Lara’s trying to drag me all across the city. I indulge her because I know she’s still got Tibet on the mind. Besides, soon enough the sun sets and the night is _mine_.

Even though my feet are killing me, I put on my most killer heels and my shortest dress, and pin Lara down until she gives in and puts on the outfit I picked out for her. This manages to backfire pretty spectacularly when she rolls me onto my back and pins _me_ to the bed. Lara’s eyes are hooded and dark and I drink in her gaze as my body lights up like a Christmas tree. It takes me ten minutes just to straighten myself out when she’s done with me but it’s totally worth it. 

Rome’s nightlife is supposed to be excellent. I have the most beautiful woman in the world on my arm. Lara is wearing this sexy, low-cut blouse and stylish leather pants, which matches really well with the black dress I’m wearing. Heads turn as we walk into the first bar and I grin toothily at Lara. She has to feel as proud as I am. My hand slides down her arm and touches the ring on her finger. I love when she wears it there instead of around her neck. I guess she isn’t expecting any kind of danger or climbing today. 

This gorgeous, sexy woman is mine, and from the way she glances at me, she feels the same way about me and there’s just something about that that makes me stupidly giddy. I don’t even go for drinks, I just drag her out to dance. Lara eventually finds her rhythm. My arms are around her neck and shoulders and we lock our eyes together, oblivious to the world.

She gives me a feathery kiss on the lips and touches her forehead to mine. “Before we left for Japan, I asked Winston to have the master bedroom stripped down. New bed, different furniture...I was torn between something modern and something classical but decided you’d like modern better. We can make it truly ours once we’re home.”

It takes a minute for that to sink in. She really _is_ serious about living at the manor. I check her forehead for a fever and she swats at my hand, rolling her eyes. So I poke her nose instead. “You better be doing this for you and not out of some misguided sense that I need some big place or something.”

“It’s for both of us, Sam. Yes, there are a lot of memories there, and it’s so ostentatious it’s a little nauseating, but it’s just being wasted sitting there, unlived in.” Lara hates waste. After all our time spent with her working two or three jobs just to get through University and keeping a roof over our heads, we’ve both learned to be thrifty. Well _she_ learned and just made me copy her, anyway. 

“Lara, there’ll be like three people if you include Winston.” I hate pointing that out, especially when her face furrows up. “Maybe we should open it up to someone. We travel a lot, right? I’m not saying rent to strangers because that’s skeevy but what if we converted it into … I don’t know, a shelter for kids or something.”

“Now that’s a thought…” 

Anything else Lara might have said is lost when someone taps my shoulder. It’s a woman, maybe late twenties. She’s pretty, in the girl-next-door sense. Her skin is tanned and there’s a long, curved scar that runs from just her left eye, down across her nose and cheek all the way to her jawline. That eye is cloudy, but her right one is the color of emeralds, and she has on dark eyeliner. Her hair though. Her hair makes me jealous. It’s long, dark red and shines in the light of the club.

She asks in Italian if she can cut in. Her voice is low and smokey and I can picture her belting out a song like ladies used to do in the forties, drawing the music from the very depths of their being.

I don’t get a chance to answer before she’s swept Lara away from me.

They dance for like twenty minutes while I nurse a drink. That lady has moves, and in a slinky navy colored dress she’s putting them to good use. I get distracted by the way the fabric molds and flows around her ankles and then at how it hugs her breasts. And it just depresses me. Lara can _tap_ that if she was inclined. There are a lot of people she could be with. Dancing with. Looking very serious and concentrated at. That’s it. I get up with every intention of throwing the first punch, but Lara intercepts me first. I pout at her and there’s more hurt in my voice than I want to let out. “Enjoy yourself?”

“It’s not…” Lara sighs in frustration and presses her palms to my cheeks. “We need to get back to the hotel and change. I’ll explain on the way there.” Her face falls as she takes in my expression. “Don’t look at me like that, Sam. You’re the only one for me.”

“Yeah. Tell that to Tits McGee.” I pull away and make it outside before she grabs my arm and holds me, her front to my back. It’s pouring out and I don’t really care if I’m channeling Himiko or not. I’ve come to learn that Himiko is the jealous sort. Or maybe she just brings that out in me.

“I did. The first time she made a pass at me I made it very clear I was already claimed by the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. This is about business, Sam. Please don’t be angry. It’s about an artifact.”

Turning around, I stare at her face. She’s genuinely fretting. My anger abates and the downpour slowly turns into a drizzle. “I just get … I mean look at her curves.”

“She does nothing for me.” When I give her a look she rolls her eyes, then drags me into a taxi for the ride back to the hotel. She doesn’t let go of my hands, and it isn’t long before I’m leaning in against her. “I take marriage very seriously. You don’t...you don’t _stray_. Especially when your wife is this jaw-dropping Japanese princess.” 

“Tell me more about this wife of yours,” I reply, nuzzling my nose into the crook of her neck.

“Oh! Well she’s gorgeous. When I run my fingers through her hair it’s like touching fine silk. Her eyes are almost always filled with light, and she’s smarter than she likes to let on. Her ability to take raw camera footage and make it into art is supernatural. I’ve known her for years and she always comes up with ways to surprise me. And…” Lara lowers her voice to try to hide her embarrassment. “And she’s utterly brilliant in the sack. A creative mind in love, you know.”

“Mm. Your wife is lucky. She has this tall, sexy and intense woman who loves her that much.” Taking Lara’s hand, I place it on my leg and rub it in place until she gets the hint. Her eyes keep darting furtively to the taxi driver until I turn her face and kiss her. I’m having trouble breathing by the time we pay the taxi and stumble towards the elevator. This is exciting but really kind of frustrating since Lara is so paranoid we’ll get caught that she can’t concentrate on what’s important. Namely, getting me off.

That all changes in the elevator when she lifts me up against the mirrored wall. I’m completely at her mercy, her hand between my legs and her mouth on the pulse-point of my throat. I don’t care where we are or who walks in on us and my nails draw blood on her shoulders. I scream my release into her mouth as she holds me against the mirror. Lara lets me down gently, both figuratively and literally, and presses some fingers against my cheek. That makes me blush more than what we just did. 

The elevator dings and this elderly couple enters. I’m standing there, my hair going in every direction, the hem of my dress riding up on one hip. Lara not-so-discreetly fixes that, and I reach up to smooth out her shirt.

Lara’s face is as red as mine. There’s this jolly song playing over the speakers as we go up several more floors while we stand next to a golden girl and her husband. I can’t say a word, and stare straight ahead until the door opens. I grab Lara’s hand and drag her out of the elevator. As the doors close, I swear to god I hear laughter behind us.

“Oh my fucking god!” I double over and start to laugh too. “Oh my god!”

Lara leans against the wall. “We are never doing that again!” I look over at her and her shoulders are shaking. I poke her in the ribs and the laughter bubbles forth. This is probably some kind of horrific nightmare for her. Which means I’ll have to work extra hard to get her to loosen up again. I’m in an amazingly good mood though, and push Lara through the door when we’re back in our room. 

It’s another thirty minutes before we’re back in a cab again. Lara makes me wear something good for running and climbing. She’s threading her wedding ring onto the string of her pendant when I finally get around to asking what’s actually going on. “So Tits McGee has some kind of...artifact? Or does she know where one is since we’re dressed like we’re going on a burglary.”

“Giovanna. That’s her name,” Lara corrects, and I wrinkle my lips and mouth the name like it tastes bad. It’s snooty. I revise her up from girl next door to Desperate Housewife.

“This is what I get for feeling jealous around Soraya, isn’t it,” she says, letting out an exasperated sigh.

“Pretty much.”

“Well, she knows enough about the official word from our adventures to have done her homework, and she said she knew where there was something that might be similar to what we’ve encountered.” 

I put my hand on Lara’s lap possessively. “Yeah, so she follows me on Youtube. That doesn’t make her an expert in funky power skulls.”

“No, but she does know things about them that you cut out of the videos.” That makes me pause. When I edited together everything out of Costa Rica and Peru I’d been careful about how much I’d shown of the copies and some of the weird faces.

“Like what kind of things?”

“That the artifacts and the shadow copies are related. She claims she’s been researching this for over a year.”

“You can’t seriously be trusting her.”

Lara shakes her head, squeezing my hand and then opening the cab door to let us out as we come to a stop. I’m relieved. I don’t like that woman on principle and I’d never actually spoken to her. And if she knows too much, there’s no telling where she got the information from, or who she’s actually working for. Whatever she told Lara has to have been really convincing.

It takes me a moment to recognize where we’re at. I turn to Lara. “The Vatican? Are we going to be committing blasphemy? Because if we’re going to be committing blasphemy I’m wearing the wrong pants.”

“We’re not… _what_? Giovanna told me that the artifact is in there. I wanted us to investigate a bit first before we meet her.” Lara takes my arm and leads me along the the outer wall. “Maybe we can sense whatever might be in there. Or maybe the figurine will. It seemed to react positively when I was speaking to her…”

“Lara, are you seriously listening to an ancient wolf statue?” It’s then that I feel it. This energy in the air and Himiko reacts _violently_ to it. Way more violently than the tiff in the club. I lean into the wall for balance as Lara says my name. It’s like she’s talking through glass.

I shake my head when the sensation passes, and look at Lara. The fright in my eyes is reflected in hers. “I’m okay I’m just...there’s something in there and Himiko doesn’t like it.”


	4. The Holy Path

We walk around the outside of the Vatican City for twenty minutes before diverting north to meet Giovanna. Just another couple seeing the sights, but with an eye for entrances. I see Sam filming possible scaling routes more than once. This is dangerous and illegal, but if what Giovanna says is true it’s a risk we might have to take. Considering Sam’s reaction to just being near I’m inclined to believe that there’s something inside the Vatican directly related to our artifact hunt. 

In all truth it’s a relief to be progressing again. My mind was still in Tibet for awhile there. I know I’ll be returning, it’s a matter of when, not if.

“I thought we weren’t going to do any of this shit on our honeymoon.” Sam threads her arm through mine, and she doesn’t sound the least bit upset. I glance at her out of the side of my eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know, you’ll just have to make it up to me later.” She looks at me through the viewfinder and I smile back before I push my hand against the lens. “ _Laaaara_!”

I owe her. I couldn’t imagine a life without her and I don’t particularly want to. That’s why I have to do things like this. Breaking into the Vatican. Hunt down that bastard Shaw. There’s no telling what he has planned for those artifacts and I worry about wasted time. But most of my leads have dried up and Soraya promised she’d call if she got a bead on the enterpretuer. I’m not sure I can trust her not to act alone (and trusting her in general takes some effort on my part). She’s too much like me in that way. I might need to call her soon, especially if I make a breakthrough at the Vatican.

“Okay. I’ll make it up to you. Lets route to Paris on the way home and we’ll do something kind of...frivolous and fun. You won’t even have to drag me out, I’ll go willingly.”

Sam leans against me. “I like dragging you around my natural habitat.”

“A Croft is willing to explore strange and sometimes frightening territories,” I respond, and Sam’s eyes crinkle cutely as she laughs.

“Just us, right? We’re not gonna let Tits McGee tag along?”

“Of course not.” Sam’s jealous, it’s pretty obvious but she doesn’t need to worry. I could see myself going for Giovanna back in our Uni days, back when I thought Sam would only ever be a dream but I have my dream girl now. I have a ring on her finger and everything.

Maybe Sam’s problem is that Giovanna has this raw charm to her, like a stone worn down around the edges and weathered by time. When she’d danced with me, it had been hard to look away. I don’t know where she got that scar, but her eyes are intelligent and strong, lacking the the sharpness I usually associate with people like Soraya or myself. Her voice doesn’t really help the charm either. It’s low and smokey. When she speaks, it’s impossible not to listen, and she was pretty good at keeping the conversation off of herself.

What’s more, she knew about the artifacts and she knew about some of their properties that we’d told no one outside our circle about. Like the way emotions become heightened around them. They don’t control you, but they do make you _feel_ things more.

Sam elbows me and I snap out of my thoughts. I look up and realize we’re almost there. Giovanna is waiting for us in front of a dimply lit building. She’s changed as well, wearing black trousers and a black sweater. Even with her hair pulled into a pony-tail it falls down past the small of her back.

We nod at each other, while Sam looks between us suspiciously. I shoot her a look, before turning to Giovanna. “You were right, there’s something in there that makes the whole area feel off. We’re attuned to it from our experiences with other artifacts.” I’m not about to mention Himiko to her. I still don’t trust her and I can’t risk anything happening to Sam.

The Italian is staring intently at Sam, and I follow her gaze. There’s blue markings on her hands. They aren’t glowing, but they’re very definitely there. Shit. I continue speaking, hoping to draw her attention from my wife, “I’m just hoping you have a better plan than break in and look around.”

“Mm.” Her eyes move over to meet mine. “I have a plan. We will not be going in blind.” She jerks her head towards Sam. “The party-girl stays here.”

“I will fucking not!” Before I can stop her, Sam steps up to Giovanna, almost in her face. I’ve hardly ever seen her this pissed at anyone before, and I’m glad it’s not at me. The last time that was directed at me made me never want to experience it again. I reach to pull her back but she smacks my hand and grabs Giovanna’s shirt. The taller woman just stares at her impassively.

“I’m not letting Lara go in with someone we just met, where she could get hurt or arrested or worse. I know what I’m doing. Just because I like to party doesn’t mean I’m _useless_.” Sam lets go of Giovanna and I take a step forward. Sam could hit her, I’m certain of it and for a moment I think she’s about to.

Then Giovanna laughs and I have to grab Sam’s wrist before she actually does haul off and punch the red-head. I pull Sam away. “She’s coming, end of story.” It’s really kind of hot the way she went off like, that but this isn’t something I’m going to encourage all that much.

“I can stand up for myself.” 

Sam tries to wrench away, but not before I whisper in her ear, “I know. I like it.”

I can see the shiver run down her spine as I let her go. The air seems to clear. Maybe disaster has been averted, but it’s obvious Sam and Giovanna are like oil and water. I’m going to need to keep between them.

“Do not expect me to bail her out if she gets us caught,” the woman says dismissively. She starts to walk down the street. I glance at Sam and hold my hands up. “Keep calm. We need her to get into the Vatican.”

“I don’t like this, Lara. There’s something up with that woman.”

Regardless, we follow her. There’s a section of wall that’s a little lower, and she explains that she’s already disabled the camera’s in the area. Sam presses her as to how she did this but there’s no time. She gives me a disgruntled look before I help her over the wall, then I hop up and pull myself over.

I’ve never been inside the Vatican before and I wish I’d done more research. I’m not too happy with following someone else, but Giovanna has an uncanny ability with directions. Sam records everything before I even ask her to. We can look at that later, if there’s a later. I’m starting to suspect it’s some kind of trap when Giovanna halts us outside one door. 

I stand guard as the woman hooks a small handheld to the electronic lock and starts to crack it. The lock blinks red, then red, then green, and the door unlocks.

Almost as soon as it opens, Sam gasps. She waves her hand at me, trying to signal she’s okay, but she’s paler and the marks on her hands have started to glow. I pull her in after Giovanna, and the Italian closes the door behind us. “What are we looking for?”

Giovanna bends over a desk, opening drawers. “I’m not sure. What I’ve researched was not clear on what it looks like, only that it’s kept in one of these rooms. The Church does not understand the value of what they have.”

“Is it like that...spear thingie?” Sam keeps her voice low as she walks past some artifacts. I’m hoping we can use Himiko to find it and get out of here. I’m willing to risk it right now, and it’s not like we have a choice.

“The Spear of Longinus,” I correct her. “They have one here, but it’s kept in the Basilica. No one knows if it’s the real one.”

“Hold the fuck on.” Sam points at me and I roll my eyes, knowing what my wife is going to say before she does. “It’s seriously the _Spear_ of _Longinus_? Oh my god the jokes write themselves! And no one knows if it’s _real_? Do you think it takes batteries?” 

“Can you watch your language when we are in the Vatican?” The Italian woman’s angry words make me snap my head up. I didn’t peg her as being religious, but I’m more worried about being discovered.

“I think if God was gonna strike me down he already would have,” Sam mutters, but she quiets and resumes looking around. I move to the opposite end of the room. There’s a wall full of books and scrolls and the hair on the back of my neck sticks up. I move my hand along the bindings, not touching anything. I stop in front of a red book with gold lettering. It’s an Italian book on early Christian scholars, but there’s something wrong with it. I pull it out and open it. 

The paper is much, much older than the bindings, but that’s not the first thing I notice. The first thing I notice is that the words are in a myriad of languages, most of them dead. I recognize a few of them from my father’s journal. That third piece of the puzzle. His hidden notes, the journal, and this book! “I think I found it.” 

I don’t know what makes me feel so uneasy about it, but it exudes that same sort of power that came with the skulls that are safely locked away back home. It’s darker though. It reminds me of the Kris, though what blood a book could draw outside of a papercut I’m not sure about. Maybe it feeds on something else.

Sam comes over, cautiously. I don’t blame her. The book makes me feel a little ill. I show her the pages and she blanches. “This book so doesn’t belong here.”

“No. It does not.” Giovanna walks over, each step purposeful. I snap the book shut and carefully place it into my satchel before she gets it in her head that she can just take it off my hands. Her eyes move between mine and where my hand is still on the bag, but I stand there patiently, waiting for her to decide if it’s worth challenging me.

She decides against it. I wouldn’t have handed it over easily anyway, but I’m not in the mood to fight if I can help it. I gesture politely. “After you.”

The red-head smirks at me, then saunters out. I watch Sam staring and glower at her, before following. I just want to get out of here and study this book.

We don’t leave the way we came in, and in fact we end up walking out of a side door like we belong there. Sam catches my eye and I nod my head, agreeing with her that there’s more to Giovanna than we think. When you know someone as well as we know each other, words aren’t always necessary.

“You’ve been there before,” I say, once we’ve put enough distance between us and the Vatican to be safe. “I was expecting…”

“Resistance?” She raises her eyebrow at me. “Come, we’ll go to your hotel room and then we can see if there’s anything in that book that can help us.”

“Who said-” I put my hand up and Sam closes her mouth. She resumes glaring at Giovanna.

I’ve had it up to here with this whole thing. “Lets just go.” I can’t shake this gnawing worry in my gut. There’d been no one there. There should have been people. Religious scholars, priests, a guard. But we hadn’t encountered a single person in the Vatican, and even the streets seem unusually empty. It could be the late hour but I have my doubts. It feels too much like we’re being led by the hand towards a specific outcome.

Back at the hotel, I place the book on the bed. I almost always have my father’s journal on me, and that goes next to the book. The notes are in my head, which I’m grateful for because I don’t want anyone outside of my team to know about them. My team… When did I start thinking of Sam and Soraya that way?

Sam is leaning against the wall while she looks at me as I get comfortable in front of the notes. She sighs. “Since I’m going to lose you in research the rest of the night, I’m going to get us coffee and something to eat.”

“Thanks, Sam.” I look up and smile at her. “I appreciate that.”

She gives me a tired grin, then turns to head out the door. She pauses, then glances at Giovanna. “You, you’re coming with me. I need help carrying things back and we totally need to talk.”

Giovanna just shrugs and vacates the desk chair. “Okay, _putana_. We’ll have our little talk.”

Somehow, I hear Sam's fist break Giovanna’s nose before I even see her move. Giovanna’s insult is only just sinking in but Sam’s knocked her down. Giovanna kicks her and I jump off the bed as they start rolling around on the floor. The Italian gets on top and punches Sam, bouncing her head into the floor. I grab her wrist before she can hit my wife again. She twists around and slams her fist into my stomach. The wind is knocked out of me but I grab her other arm and yank her back. Giovanna hits the ground and I plant my knee between her shoulder blades.

There’s a few seconds of blissful silence. Giovanna is bleeding on the floor and I hear Sam groan behind me. “For god’s sake it’s like dealing with children.” I dig my fingers into Giovanna’s hair and yank, hard. Leaning down, I let all my anger and frustration at the situation into my voice. “If you _ever_ touch Sam again, I swear to _god_ they won’t find where I bury your body.”

“...Fuck, Lara that’s hot.”

“Don’t you start, Sam.” I shove Giovanna’s face back into the floor and get off of her. “I know you two don’t get along, but if we’re going to figure out this goddamn book I can’t have you two trying to kill each other!”

“Lara…”

I take a deep breath, going over to check on Sam. She’s going to have a nasty bruise on her cheek and eye, and her knuckles are pretty bruised too. “I’m not happy with you either. I know you think she deserved it and maybe she did, but that’s not-”

“Lara…!”

“What!” I take another breath and grind my teeth. “I’m sorry, I’m a bit peckish and frankly I’m tired of the two of you-”

She grabs my head and makes me look behind me. The ink from the book is writhing and flowing off of the pages like water. Where it hits the floor it bubbles and grows into a human figure. Another shadow puppet. It looks at me, it’s eyes cold, like distant stars on a black field.

I get to my feet and storm past Giovanna. The Italian woman is looking much too calm for what’s happening, but I don’t have time to think about that right now. I duck as the creature swipes at me, then punch it in the throat.

It makes a gurgling sound as it dissolves into a black mist. I glare at the floor, then at the two other women. “Are we going to have any other problems or can I get back to work?”

There are no arguments, but I don’t get back to work right away. I get Sam taken care of first with an ice pack, then order take out because she’s not going anywhere anytime soon. Giovanna can take care of herself and sometime during the evening she and Sam disappear. Sam comes back alone. I have to assume Sam didn’t murder her and leave the body somewhere.

As I sit on the bed scribbling notes, I think about the whole situation. She’d reacted to the shadow puppet like she’d seen one before, and that’s concerning. She’s not here right now to ask, so I file that away for later. She has answers, and she’s going to give them or I swear to god I’ll give her more than a broken nose.

The weird presence is gone now and several pages are now blank, but there’s a dozen references to Greek settlements in Turkey. One name in particular keeps coming up. I close the book and page through my father’s journal.

Home is going to have to wait. I drop it into my lap and sigh. I just hope one of us doesn’t end up throttled by the time we get there.

Giovanna returns later in the evening and I stop her as she enters the hotel room. We stare each other down until she blinks. “What do you want?”

“You’ve seen those creatures before, haven’t you.”

Pursing her lips, she steps past me and sits on the edge of the bed. “I have heard stories, and I have found evidence of them in some ancient texts. And...” She looks away. “I was exploring a cave in Spain when I encountered one.”

That grabs my attention, because my own research has turned up nothing. “Tell me more.”

“There is not much.” She shrugs her shoulder. “Only that they are guardians, made from the blood and bodily fluids of human sacrifices. That, or they are the vengeful spirits of the dead. Or perhaps they are remnants of gods. It depends on where you look. The only thing I see common are the numbers seven, thirteen and one-twenty-eight. They appear with nearly every reference to the creatures.”

“Well that’s frustrating.” Sam is sitting up on the other end of the bed. I thought she’d been asleep but she must have been listening in. She’s right, it really is frustrating. Different stories, and I don’t know if they’re actual myths or something Giovanna pulled out of thin air. I still don’t know anything about her. She seems honest and she’s found information that’s eluded me, but she loses points for antagonizing Sam. I look between them.

Giovanna holds up her hands. “I am not going to start anything.”

“Yeah Lara, we totally talked it out. We’re chill now.” 

Sam gives me a thumbs up, but I have to ask. “When did you have the chance to do that?”

She flashes me a toothy grin. “You were so into your homework that an army could have marched through and you wouldn’t have noticed.”

Somehow I don’t believe that they’ve reached any sort of agreement beyond ‘no fighting in front of Lara’ but I don’t pursue it. “Yes, I did my homework. I know where we need to go next.” I glance at Giovanna, heartened by the fact that my theory on the numbers may be on the right track.

She looks back at me. “And where is that?”

Giovanna bristles when I ignore her and look at Sam. “Hon, can you book us a flight to Istanbul? We’re going to Turkey.”


	5. No Sam Without Lara

I swear to god I’m going to kill Giovanna. I hate that bitch. I hate the way she looks at Lara, I hate her condescending tone, I hate how she treats me like I’m some liability. It felt so, so good hitting her, and my black eye is so worth it. And Lara… Lara is hot when she’s angry. I want to show her how hot but Giovanna is around and Lara has a lot of work to do.

So I go to cool my head on the roof and Giovanna is there. She’s leaning on a railing on the roof. Walking over, I follow her gaze along the rooftops of Rome. It’s really beautiful tonight. 

Giovanna’s expression is almost wistful and unguarded before she notices me and we have a glare off for a few minutes, before she says, “You have a good right hook.”

Did Tits McGee just compliment me? I don’t think I can deal, but I shrug a shoulder. “You too.” Like this is somehow something we should be proud of. Fuck it. We _should_ be proud. I’m this tiny little Japanese girl and I broke a nose. And Giovanna is kind of this vampish woman who’s only a little better at fighting than me considering how easily Lara took her down. But then again, that’s Lara, and she’s a BAMF.

“Clearly, we are going to be working together.”

“Clearly.” I say, eyeing her warily.

“We should keep the fighting to a minimum, at least when your wife is around. Or we will never accomplish a thing.” She turns back towards the city. She’s right, and that kind of pisses me of that she got to be the better woman before I could be, but I fold my arms and seethe internally.

“Okay.” It’s the only thing I can say. We stand in tense silence for awhile before I need to hear sounds. “How did you get that scar?”

Her head doesn’t move but I can feel her looking at me out of the corner of her eye. I guess she’s weighing if she wants to throw me off the roof or something, and she doesn’t answer me right away. I sigh and look up at the sky and after another minute I hear her walk back inside. Maybe I should have thrown her off. Violence solves everything!

I return to the room after awhile too and nap a bit. Lara is so adorable when she’s in the zone and I can’t keep my eyes open long enough to cheer her on. Luckily, I’m awake in time to hear Giovanna’s explanations. What I’m not expecting is booking a flight to Turkey. That’s a country we’ve never been to and I’ve been hoping we’d get a few days at home doing married couple stuff but the look in Lara’s eyes tells me that’s going to have to wait. When she looks at me like that I can’t deny her anything. She owes me married couple stuff. I should probably find out what married couple stuff is, but I want to do it at least a little. 

I’m nice so I even get First Class for Giovanna. Several rows back and on the other side of the plane to us because I don’t think I could stand being next to her in closed quarters for that long, but I _could_ have booked her coach. The flight is uneventful and I spend the entire time writing down what I think married people stuff is and showing Lara. She rolls her eyes a few times but puts up with it. I hope she gets the hint, because I’m all but hitting her over the head with it.

After I start discussing curtains she puts a hand over my mouth. “Sam. I get it. You want to do domestic things. But this is really, really important.”

I lick her hand until she lets go and goes ‘ew’, then take it back and squeeze it. “I know it’s important and you _know_ I like doing these things with you. I just don’t want to miss out on the boring mundane stuff either. I mean, what if we’re like 80 and we never even picked out curtains together! What would our kids say?”

She gives me a slightly traumatized look. “Kids? And wouldn’t they be excited about all the stories we’d have to tell?”

“Well yeah. And they’ll get to watch all the videos I take, but _curtains_ Lara! Curtains!”

She stares at me again, and then shakes her head like she thinks I’m a little crazy. “First thing we do back in London, we’ll pick out curtains. Happy?”

“Very.” 

She nuzzles the top of my head and I hear her murmur ‘she wants _kids_ ’ in a terrified little voice. I mean I haven’t given it much thought but it’s crossed my mind. I wonder if there’s some kind of weird science that can impregnate an egg with another egg because Lara’s babies would be _beautiful_. Isn’t there something about bone marrow? 

I kind of just want a piece of her, because she could be taken away from me in a heartbeat. I turn my head up and kiss her. It catches her off guard, but it feels like we have a very in depth conversation about how much I need her, all through the use of our tongues.

We’re not in Instanbul for long but I make a note to come back here sometime when we can enjoy it. We take a connecting flight to Izmir from there rent an SUV to head farther south. The weather is actually pretty nice but I pay, because I’ll be damned if we don’t have decent climate control this time. 

I text Soraya a bit while Lara drives. She says Shaw has been quiet this whole time, but there’s some kind of big thing planned and she’ll let us know once she’s got a location. She tells me she’s got someone waiting for us at Ephesus. It’s pretty much a tourist site at this point, so I hope we can find what we’re looking for. “Hey Lara. Did you talk to Soraya about this? She says a friend of hers is waiting at the site.”

“Yes, I asked her a few things about Ephesus, as well as some other concerns of mine.” She glances at me and mouths Giovanna’s name.

“Gotcha.” I settle back down and let Soraya know we’re grateful for the help. I get a message from Jonah and spend the next half hour of the drive telling him all about our honeymoon. And I send him pictures, because he’s like our big cuddly bear of a brother and I’m pretty sure he shipped us the moment we stepped onto that boat.

The place is packed with tourists. I dig my camera out of my backpack and pan around. There’s a sea of faces from all over the world and it’s really kind of awesome to see how busy it is. Lara looks conflicted. Happy to see some ancient wonders getting attention, but probably afraid of the damage people who don’t know any better can do. I slide my hand into the back pocket of her pants and squeeze. “Okay do we know who we’re looking for?”

“Her name is Leda.” Lara looks around. “She should have curly brown hair, about shoulder length.”

“Yeah, like that narrows it down.”

But it turns out that Leda finds us. She’s a cheerful looking woman, a little taller than me. Her face is rounded, with grey eyes that look like fog on the sea. Her hair is a tangle of coarse curls that frame her face and shoulders and her skin is a warm, earthy tone. She’s a bit on the plump side.

She and Lara talk in another language. I think it’s Greek, but at least Giovanna looks as clueless as I feel. Leda claps Lara on the shoulder and then hugs her. After introductions, she gives me and Giovanna hugs too. “Raya’s told me a lot about you both!”

That might not be a good thing. “...oh god I’m so sorry.”

“Good things, I promise!” When Leda speaks, she moves her hands to emphasize her words. She’s a very energetic speaker and I wonder how ‘Raya’ and her met. She raises her eyebrows at us. “We’re not going to find anything just looking around.”

I glance at Lara, who shrugs and pulls out her notebook. She shows it to Leda. “We need to find this symbol. I’ve seen it at multiple locations around the world. Turkey was mentioned several times when I was studying a book we found. I’m positive there’s a link.” 

I’ve seen the sketches. Lara drew them from the video I’ve taken from the shrines. The faces are there too. I hadn’t thought to look for those but that would narrow things down, wouldn’t it?

“Kind of abstract, isn’t it?” She takes the journal from Lara and looks more closely at it. “This one looks pretty familiar. There’s a face a lot like it but it’s in a less interesting area.”

“Less interesting to tourists maybe.” Lara literally bounces on her heels in excitement and I grab her hand before she runs off.

“Try not to look like a kid in a candy store okay? We probably don’t want to draw too much attention.”

She gives me a sheepish grin and then starts off at a slower pace. I watch her fondly for a moment then chase after her. Leda catches up a few moments later. She looks at me with a grin. “She loves this, doesn’t she.”

“Yeah, this is like her element.” I think I like her. She’s really photogenic too. “How do you know Soraya?”

Leda laughs. “How do I know her? Intimately, Samantha.”

“Sam, no one cal---wait really? You’ve tapped that?” I zoom the camera in on her face. “Spare no details, Leda! I want the scoop on the mysterious mercenary!”

I get the scoop. In fact it’s such a scoop that I’m pretty sure Soraya is going to kill Leda and me. But it’s totally worth it because Leda’s face lights up when she talks about the mercenary. I really hope she knows that there’s someone who reacts that way when talking about her. Soraya never exactly oozes happiness when she’s around us. Now I’m hoping her flirting had been just flirting, because I’m going to punch her in the face if she breaks Leda’s heart.

Time goes by so quickly that it feels like I’ve blinked and we’re there. Leda rubs her hands together and points. I don’t see anything, but Lara inspects more closely.

Carved on the rear side of one pillar is a face. It’s smiling at us. A really creepy smile that sends chills down my spine. “Okay, sweetie. So now what?”

Giovanna pushes past me. “We find a way inside.”

“Is there an inside?”

Leda is the one that answers. “Probably! A team recently used some sonar equipment and there’s a lot of gaps and underground passages in the area.”

“You’d think that would make the news,” Lara replies, digging her fingers into a gap in the stone.

“Not when they don’t want people knowing about it.” Leda moves to help. “The team is one of Shaw’s, but I know the people who rented them their equipment. They were really excited.”

“Well then, we’re about to find out why.” We get the gap wide enough for Lara to slip through. Giovanna follows her, and I turn to Leda. 

“Coming?”

She shakes her head. “You need someone to keep watch. I promised Raya I’d be careful, anyway.”

“Okay. Hopefully we won’t be long.”

It’s really dark inside the tunnels, but we have flashlights and my camera so we can see. It’s impossible to get lost because it’s a very long tunnel with no obvious branches for the first hundred yards or so.

I keep my voice low as I ask, “So what are we looking for?”

The left fork ends over thin air, and Lara shines her light down into it. “Anything that feels off. The artifacts always draw us to them, remember?”

“Yeah. This place is creepy.”

Giovanna started down the other branch. “Nothing feels off in that pit. We should try this way.”

I shrug and follow her. The hair on my arms starts to stand on end after a few minutes. After another ten we don’t really need a flashlight anymore because the markings on my arms are glowing. Lara touches my face and her fingers feel cold. I’m really hoping the face ones aren’t permanent. “I’m okay. I guess we can tell how close we are with how glowy I am.”

“At least you’re useful for something,” Giovanna says, and something stirs inside me that I have to fight down. Lara’s hand on my arm helps, and we keep walking. 

“I’m not seeing any of that black water. Usually there’s no way to get to the ruins with these artifacts without going through some.” Lara sounds worried, but I’m relieved. Whenever there’s black water those shadow puppets show up and they’re bad news.

“Maybe this Shaw person did something with it.”

I’m reminded that Giovanna doesn’t know everything and I feel better. We haven’t really talked about Shaw. I nearly bump into Lara when she stops moving, and I look past her. The path ends in a dip. It’s a drop of about three feet into a walled off garden. The plants are all carved stone and there are broken pillars spaced throughout. I see the second creepy face of the day, carved into a statue atop one of the intact pillars.

We’re not alone. There’s a ladder leading up to a platform, and three men are prying at something on top of it. “Lara, do you see?”

I don’t hear her response, because my head suddenly explodes into pain.

****

First Day

I hate my parents. I just want one day. One _hour_ with them. Just them and me, but it never happens. And now they’ve sent me away like I’m a piece of luggage or something inconvenient. To this stodgy school in England. _England_.

I wish I’d stolen something more expensive, maybe they’d have sent me some place exciting instead.

_England._

I have to share a room with someone, but it could have been one of those schools where like eighty girls share a dorm. Small comforts right? The teacher leaves me in front of the door and I let myself in.

There’s a brunette girl sitting at a desk. She’s a little younger than me and her hair is pulled back in a braid. She’s _gorgeous_. Her tongue is stuck out in concentration as she reads a leatherbound book bigger than a bible. She looks up at me when I close the door. They’re the greenest eyes I’ve ever seen. 

I fold my arms. “Hi. I’m Sam.”

“I’m Lara. Nice to meet you. Your bed is over there.” She points, then looks back down at her book. I swear she’s blushing, but she’s going to just bury her nose in a book when _I’ve_ just shown up? 

Oh. That’s so not happening. Operation Remove Stick From Butt has now commenced.

****

Last Day

“It’s _fucking Cambridge_ Lara. _Cam fucking bridge!_ ” I can’t believe it. Of course she’d get into Cambridge. I wave the acceptance letter in her face. “Do you know where I found this, Lara Croft? In the trash! What was it doing _in the trash_?!”

She snatches it out of my hand. “I can’t afford it.”

“Bullshit! We both know you can afford it. I mean come on, your grades are awesome, you’re brain is awesome, _you’re_ awesome! Why miss out?”

She levels a look at me. “ _Someone else_ put my name in.”

“Because I care about your future, sweetie!” And it had hurt. It had hurt like a bitch to think about how far apart we’d be. But it was totally a pain I’d bear for her. Except she’s not going to let me. 

“I’m not cruising through life on my father’s money.” She starts to rip the letter up before I can stop her. I stare in horror as the pieces flitter to the ground. “I’m going to work for it. Through scholarships and jobs. I have… Sam you don’t understand, I have to do this for myself.”

For some reason I’m a little broken up over it. I mean, I hadn’t been accepted. Of course. I’m going to UCL. Lara has a golden ticket to one of the best archaeology schools in the world and she just tore it up. My voice catches in my throat. “No, I _don’t_ understand.”

She takes my hands and squeezes them. “I’m going to UCL. They have everything I need there. The right classes, good teachers, and you.”

“Oh.” It’s the only thing I can think of to say. “Is it selfish to feel happy about that?”

“Of course not. What’s the point of chasing a dream if you leave your family behind in the process?”

****

Drowning

I’m in the galley when it happens. The ship wrenches around and water starts pouring in. I’m scrambling, trying to get back to my feet but I’m washed out and into the angry ocean.

Even as it batters me, I hear a voice. It’s calling my name, calling for me. I think maybe it’s Lara but my lungs are burning and I don’t know if I can make it.

The water churns around me as I break the surface. I think I see land so I kick in that direction. The waves actually help a bit, but my muscles are burning by the time I crawl onto shore. I don’t know where the others are and I kind of just have to hope everyone made it off the ship. They all have to be okay. God, I knew this had been a bad idea. My gut kept telling me that. I should have listened to it.

What am I gonna do?

****

Burning

Lara looks terrible. I can still hear the sound of them hitting her even though it’s stopped. It’s a sight I can’t unsee. Tied up helplessly, my wrists aching and rubbed raw by coarse rope while the most important person in my life gets the shit beat out of her.

It all starts to sink in. They’re going to turn me into a human torch and then they’re going to do terrible terrible things to Lara before they kill her. I just...give up. The fire is lit and Lara tells me to look at her. I can smell the smoke and feel the heat but Lara forces me to focus on her and only her. I don’t know how she does it but I think I love her for it.

And then the wind catches me off guard and our link is broken, along with all the unsaid things passing between us. A presence envelopes me and the ropes loosen enough that when my legs give out I slide down the pole. The presence disappears and when I regain my senses Lara is gone too.

****

Dressing

He throws the dress in and waits, arms folded and staring at me. I pick it up and glare. It’s like a defense mechanism. What the fuck else can I do? I’m fucking terrified. I keep expecting someone to break in and… well the way they keep looking I’m pretty sure the only thing keeping me safe is the fact that Mathias doesn’t want his precious vessel ‘tainted.’

I should feel better about that than I do, especially with the way the Solari leers as I change. I want to claw his eyes out. I actually think about it. Lara would. Probably. Ever since she saved me in the temple I’ve been thinking about her. She’s like...the goddamn Batman. And I know she’ll come for me now. So I have to be patient. I have to trust her, because I can’t get out of this alone.

****

Ritual

Himiko’s corpse is ugly. It doesn’t stink though, and the weirdest thing is that it feels like she’s watching me. Every time I move. I can’t shake it. It’s fucked up, but I’m pretty sure that she’s alive in there. I stop feeling sorry for her right around when she starts to claw her way into me.

It burns, like I’m on fire, it tears at me like someone is taking a broken bottle to the inside of my skull. She’s there, she’s pushing me out and there’s _nothing_ there’s _nothing at all_ I can do and nothing waiting for me. I think I hear something. Fighting. Lara! I fight back too, inch by figurative inch, pushing back against the Sun Queen to reclaim my body. There’s no punching, not even some kind of weird psychic X-men plane, just will against will and fuck I’m stubborn when I don’t want to give up.

Stubborn, but losing. She’s had thousands of years to prepare for this moment, and how many other women has she overpowered? I just want to see Lara again. For some reason, that becomes the only thing I can think about, even as I feel everything fading to black around me.

The pain is gone when I open my eyes. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Lara’s face is haloed as the sun shines down on us, and she’s _saved_ me. I don’t know if it’s the sun or the way she’s looking at me, but I’ve never felt more warm and safe.

It took two years for us to heal, and it’s not a complete process. It never _will_ be. I sometimes look back and wonder why it took us so long, when our emotions had been so high just after. I think I was scared. Scared of losing my savior, scared of what the emotions I was feeling meant for us. Scared that they were just in the moment and nothing more. I sure as hell wasn’t in the right mental space for a real relationship, either. 

And every time I question it, question _us_ I think back to that day. She went through hell for me. She saved my _soul_. Not just my life. That has to be love, right? That has to mean something. It means _everything._ We waited and the feelings only got stronger until they finally burst and we let ourselves have each other.

But Himiko wasn’t destroyed. She’s still there, at the back of my mind and the edge of my conciousness. It’s like she’s always been waiting. Waiting and watching and _judging_. She’s not pleased I’ve found my happy. Every important moment is flashing through my mind. First meetings and first kisses and proposals, all while my head rings. I’m floating. Someone is _shouting_.

I’m not me anymore. My eyes open and I can see through them, but it’s Himiko who lifts her hand towards Lara, the smell of ozone filling the air. It’s Himiko who calls down the thunder.


	6. No Lara Without Sam

The crack reverberates through my chest. I turn in time to see Sam go down and I see _red_. I’m on her attacker in an instant, punching him to get him off balance and then grabbing him by the face and slamming his head into the ground. Seven times. Seven times until he stops moving, blood pooling under his skull. I don’t pay him any more heed because Sam’s hurt.

I kneel over her. I don’t know if I can risk moving her. Her breathing is rapid and shallow and her eyes just look past me like I’m not even there. Checking her hair my hand comes away wet with her blood. Panic seizes me and I sit there numbly, staring at my fingers. This is bad, this is so bad. I can’t… I can’t…”Sam..Sam! Don’t do this to me! Wake up, damn it!”

“Screaming at her is not going to help!” It was Giovanna. I’d forgotten she was even with us. 

“We need to get her to a hospital, but she’s in no condition to walk.” Focus on the logistics, Lara. Focus on what needs to be done to help her. There’ll be time to panic later when Sam is safe. But then there’s never time to panic. There’s never been time to panic.

She looks at me finally and I’m so relieved I don’t see the glow in her eyes until it’s nearly too late. The lightning strikes several feet behind me and I hear a man scream. I barely have time to feel a thing before a gust of wind throws me away from my wife.

Sam stands, her limbs spasming like she’s a marionette. I cautiously get to my feet, unable to tear my eyes away. Her head is flopping to the side. It straightens with a jerk and it’s so obvious it’s not Sam looking at me that I have to fight the urge to throw up.

If she’s not in there somewhere I really don’t know what I’m going to do. We have plans together. A life to live but it always comes back to that goddamn island. If I could firebomb the place I would. Wipe it from the face of the earth and let it burn the memories with fire.

“Give her _back!_. You have no right to her. None!” The anger fuels me and I latch on to it. I scream at Himiko in English and then in Japanese. “ _[She’s not yours and I won’t let you have her!]_ ”

I don’t know if Sam can hear me but I call her name. “Sam, you can _do_ this. Come back to me. I don’t know _who_ I am without you.” I step closer, hands out. I don’t go for my weapons - that’s a last resort and one I feel physical pain for even considering. But if she’s...no longer in there, or if she’s suffering…

Wind hits me and I’m thrown to the ground. But I get up. She knocks me back into a stone pillar. But I get up. Himiko starts throwing wind and rain at me. There’s a storm outside but inside this temple it’s a hurricane. Mist whirls around me as I slam into a wall, then get ripped into the air only to collide with the ceiling. I land on the ground. My back and head hurt, and when I breathe there’s a sharp pain. I can’t hear anything but the wind, and I shout, “Sam!”

Himiko appears out of the mist and her hand closes around my throat. Her face is contorted into a mockery of Sam’s. I grab her wrist and twist it and she lets go. I see an opening and I butt my head against hers. She staggers back and I leap, wrapping my arms around her and knocking us both to the ground. “Sam, _please_!!”

Drawing a knife, I stare into her eyes, looking for a sign, for something, anything of my Sam. I don’t see anything, and I press the blade against her heart. Blood wells up around the tip. Don’t think, don’t feel, don’t feel. I can’t let myself feel this, I...There’s a flash in her eyes and I let go of the knife. She was there, just long enough to give me hope, but then Sam is gone too soon because I’m suspended again. Himiko sucks away the air around me until there’s nothing for me to breathe. I claw at my throat as though that will somehow help.

Shadows close around me. 

_”Lara!”_

When my eyes open, I’m floating in a black abyss. I try to call Sam’s name but no sound comes from my mouth, and I can’t see a damn thing. I can’t even _feel anything_. The only thing that’s clear is a humming sound, all around me. Had Himiko killed me? Had my moment’s hesitation doomed Sam to a lifetime of mental damnation? No, I’d seen her. I’d seen Sam’s eyes come through. No matter what else happens, Sam is still in there, and that means I can save her. 

Hands grab at my ankles. I still can’t see anything but I can feel them, dragging me down, dragging me away from Sam, dragging me towards an abyss. It feels like hundreds and hundreds of hands. I kick and I claw and I punch and the hands let go of me. Air surges through my lungs as I sit bolt upright, gasping. I’d been out cold. Each breath hurts and the sudden oxygen just makes me dizzy. I still can’t see, my eyes are obscured by blood. As I regain my senses I hear Sam crying. I crawl towards that sound. When my hand lands on her knee she jerks away at first, but I pull her back. My throat feels like it’s full of rocks. “Sam...thank god...”

“I’m sorry..I...I’m so sorry.” Sam’s voice is broken and tiny, each worried accompanied by a shuddering sob. Her hair is soft and she smells like heaven as I pull her down and bury my face in her head. 

“I’m okay. We’re okay. You’re so strong, Sam, you fought her off.”

Sam tries to jerk away again, and her shriek rings in my ears. “I nearly _killed you_! I could have killed you, I was hurting you and I couldn’t stop it! I don’t want to be her, I don’t want to have to watch her hurt people. It’s-”

“It’s her and not you. You’re not Himiko. She just used you. You’re _not_ her and you’ll _never_ be her!” She sniffles and shifts against me and burrows into my arms. I hold her like she’s going to be ripped away from me at any moment. ”You’re here, there’s still...god I almost...I’m so _fucking sorry_ , Sam!”

She speaks so quietly I barely catch her words, but they make my blood run cold. “Next time do it. I’ll forgive you. I forgive you ahead of time but next time you have to do it.”

How could she ask me to ever do something like that? There’s a choked sound and it’s coming from my own throat. The world spins, but I can at least see again. She’s looking up at me as my tears drip down onto her cheeks. I’m too shattered to even be angry. “No… _no_! Not as long as there’s a chance you’re still in there.”

Her hand touches my cheek. “Lara it’s like hell. Like my soul is being ripped at and shredded and then watching her hurt you, helpless to stop it, knowing it’s my face that you’re seeing doing it...I’d rather you set me free. Promise me.”

“I _can’t_.” Now I’m angry. I pull her up so we’re both sitting and shake her by the shoulders. “If you’re still in there I’ll cut my way into hell to get you back out. Do you understand? You keep me human, Sam. You keep me _stable_. I trust you to have the strength to break free so you have to trust me. Do you trust me?”

She searches my eyes, then sighs and nods. “I trust you. Oh my god…” She hugs me tightly and I start to shake. “Lara…”

“Just don’t...ask me things like that,” I whisper. “We’re going to banish Himiko away.”

“I thought controlling the weather and defending us would be useful...but the power isn’t worth it.” Power corrupts. It’s an old adage but no less true. Every time she uses it, it weakens her and makes Himiko stronger. 

Everything is catching up to me and the urge to have a nervous breakdown is nearly overwhelming. I put it aside, like I had on Yamatai, like I did in every crisis, and get to my feet. It’ll catch up to me eventually, I know. But I put it aside. Sam gets up too and I check her head. The blood is dry, and her scalp is clearly tender but I thought her injury was worse than that. I turn her around and kiss her. “I’m not going to ask any questions, I’m just relieved you’re okay…” 

“Just gonna have a headache.” She winks at me. I want her checked out, but we need to get out of here first. “Hey, where’s Giovanna?”

I look around. Rubble is everywhere, and Giovanna could be buried alive. The other thing I notice is a distinct lack of a presence in the air. A sinking feeling fills my stomach - the artifact is gone. Giovanna could have taken it in the chaos, but I start looking for her anyway.

There’s a foot underneath a stone slab, but after I push the rubble off I see it’s a man. 

“Here!” I follow Sam’s voice. Giovanna is half-buried in debris and it takes us twenty minutes to dig her out. She’s covered in dirt and there’s a gash on her forehead. I feel momentarily guilty for thinking the worse of her.

The guilt evaporates when she draws a gun on Sam. I grab her wrist and yank her arm up. “She’s fine! She’s fought back Himiko!” She looks at me, and I stare at her with all the fury I’m feeling right now. Giovanna can’t beat me in a fair fight one on one and she knows it. Her grip on her gun loosens and I relieve her of the weapon.

“Keep an eye on her. Next time, I _will_ shoot her.” She wrenches her arm free and limps into the empty garden.

I watch her, then pull Sam back into my arms. Once I assure myself that she’s still okay even though nothing has happened, I let go and move after Giovanna. The garden is a mess of rubble, the fight with Himiko having damaged centuries old carvings and pillars.

The color of red draws my eye, and I kneel to inspect a broken altar. It has the swirling paint we’re familiar with, but as I start digging I feel my heart sink into my feet. Whatever artifact it had held is gone now. Those men had to have been Shaw’s people, and while we’d been distracted by what was happening to Sam, someone had made off with what we’d come here for.

I feel exhaustion creep into my bones, but I force myself to stand. “We need to get out of here before someone comes to see what all the noise is about.”

Giovanna makes a disgusted noise, before she starts back the way we came. I pull Sam along as we hurry after. Her hand is tight in mind and I’m not going to let go until she tells me to. We don’t see any more bodies or other evidence of our attackers, and I start to worry about Leda. She is a nice woman and even I had noticed the way she talked about Soraya. Maybe she’s Soraya’s Sam. That makes me want to check on her even more. 

Water is flowing around our feet as we make our way out. I stop Giovanna when we get to the tunnel exit, and then peer around outside. The sky is grey, the clouds rolling and angry and rain is pouring down like some god (or goddess) is very, very angry. That explains the flooding, and it only looks like it’s going to get worse. 

“I’m totally not doing that,” Sam says. I squeeze her hand. We both know better.

Leda is leaning against a wall, arms folded as she tries to shield herself from the rain. I don’t see anyone else so I crawl out and whisper her name. The woman jumps two feet into the air and she thwaps me in the shoulder. “I don’t know what is going on but I’m glad you’re all right. They’re rushing everyone out because of the flooding.”

“Lets go then.” I want to put distance between myself and this place, and the memory of Sam’s body jerking around as Himiko had asserted control. Every time I close my eyes I see it. I hope I can forget her face, sneering and cruel, and the feel of the air being ripped from my lungs. Sam’s hand rests on my back and I shake myself out of it. 

We run pell mell through the rain, finding the rover in the chaos and climbing in. We’re going to lose our deposit from all the mud and water but that doesn’t really matter. I throw it into gear, and after a few false starts where the wheels spin, get us moving. It’s slow going to get back to the freeway, and several times flood waters nearly wash us away.

“This is bad,” Leda says, her face plastered to the window. “I don’t know how all those people are going to get some place safe.”

Her face becomes illuminated by a blue glow from the front seat. Sam’s eyes have that eerie light about them and her markings are bright and blinding. I grab her wrist, hard. “SAM!”

“I’ve got this.”

“Sam we talked about this, you’re just going to-”

Her voice crackles as the markings on her spark. I jerk my hand away as I get shocked. Thunder rumbles overhead in time to her words. “ _I’ve got this._ You heard her, right? This is my fault and I don’t want to hurt anyone else. Let me do this, Lara. If I can’t come back...”

The wind outside picks up, buffeting the truck and making it rock back and forth. The sky starts to clear as the winds push the clouds apart. From the back seat, Giovanna has drawn a gun. I draw my own as she points it at the back of Sam’s head. I click the safety off as I sight between Giovanna’s eyes. Sam could probably fry us both if she wanted, before either of us can pull the trigger.

It’s Leda who breaks the standoff. She puts one hand on Giovanna’s wrist, and the other on my own and forces us to lower our weapons. “Let her do this. She has to know that you trust her. If you trust her she’ll trust herself.”

The Italian snorts. “You didn’t see how easily she was possessed.”

“She came back, didn’t she?” In a single smooth motion the brunette disarms us both and clicks the safeties back into place. I start at her dumbfounded and she gives me a cheeky smile. “Be around a mercenary long enough and you learn some neat tricks.”

“Teach me that sometime.” Sam startles me and I turn back in my seat to face her again. The glow in her eyes is gone, and while the Sun Queen markings are still on her skin, they’re no longer lit up. I pull her hand against my chest.

The sky is clear now, bright blue as far as we can see. The ground is still muddy but flooding is much less of a risk. I peer into Sam’s dark eyes. They’re clear. I kiss her, then again and I don’t care that we’re not alone. “ _Please_ don’t do that again!”

“I’m fine!” She says it and I almost believe her. Giovanna clears her throat from the backseat, so I get us moving again. Sam’s hand finds it’s way to my knee and I hold it in a death grip. 

The silence is unbearable. So much hangs in the air. “What was different this time?”

“Back in the ruins I was hit in the head. Since I wasn’t...consciously fighting her she kinda just took over. But in regaining control I learned a few things about her and how she works, right?” I haven’t let go of her hand but she’s using her other hand to gesture as she speaks. “And I realized that it was still raining. The storm was still going on even though I’m back in charge of my own head.”

Sam pokes herself in the forehead. “Sooooo I gambled that I could make the storm go away without her taking over and oh my god is she pissed.”

God, I wish Sam wouldn’t gamble with her soul like that. She’s called me her soul mate before and while I once said it back, it’s not something I think about much. The concept scares the shit out of me. What happens if I lose her? Not just her life, but if her soul is destroyed, where does that leave me. I set my jaw and stare straight ahead before the prickling behind my eyes can become something embarrassing. I don’t even have it in me to yell at her right now.

She turns her hand around in my grip and our fingers lock together. “I’m sorry… I know I promised I wouldn’t tap into it, but if people are going to be hurt I can’t just...do nothing.”

I can’t promise that we’ll avoid situations where she might be forced to tap into it and I can’t think of a way to keep her out of direct danger. I don’t entirely buy her explanation and it only makes me want to try harder to find a way to pull out whatever tendrils of Himiko that are still inside my wife.

When I glance down at our hands, both of our knuckles are white and my hand aches, but Sam doesn’t let go of me. I wouldn’t let her even if she tried.


	7. Reunion

Without the skull we return back to the London. I’m so relieved to be home. Our home as a _married_ couple. Really, once we left Tibet we haven’t been able to just be married and I’m going to enforce a strictly domestic home policy for at least a week. With Lara paranoid about the artifacts we _do_ have it’s an uphill battle that I’m losing, but when I dump one of the cats in her lap I finally get her nose out of her journals. 

She scritches Grim’s head and looks up at me. “Okay I get it, I’ve been neglecting you.”

The tabby meows in agreement while I nod my head vigorously. “Married couple stuff, Lara. You need to get out of the house. _I_ need to get out of the house. It’s stupid, I know it is but we need to be normal for a little while.”

“It’s not stupid.” Lara closes her journal and gently puts the cat on the floor. She gets up and puts her arm around me as she guides me out of the study. “I was on the phone with Soraya earlier. She said she had a lead, but she’s not going to call again for a few hours.”

“And you’d rather spend your time waiting with me than researching, right?” I don’t want to be the kind of wife that makes her spouse drop everything at the drop of a hat for her. I don’t. I feel guilty saying that as soon as it’s out of my mouth. “God I’m being a selfish bitch!”

She stops moving and gives out a little sigh and strokes my cheek. “I’m being a little selfish too. Getting absorbed in something like this.”

I burst into a smile, still feeling way more selfish than Lara has a right to. But I’m not gonna argue. “Okay I’ll drive. That way you can read up on your phone while we’re on the way!” 

Lara gets this adorably panicked look on her face but I’ve already grabbed the keys and I’m running for the garage. I can hear her behind me as I turn and try not to break my neck on the stairs. There’s this _crashing_ sound and Lara has jumped off the stairs and landed on a table. She rolls to her feet and looks okay so I dart past her. She nearly grabs my arm but I shake her off.

The best part is she’s laughing as she chases me to the car, just a little too late, because I dive into the driver’s seat. She stands next to the door, leaning against it as we both pant for breath.

“How old was that table you just broke?” It looked expensive, but not old. I’m not going to tell her it probably cost a few hundred pounds though.

“Oh god. Thirty years, I think?” She leans in and pecks my cheek. “Just try to drive like a normal person? Please?”

“Says the lady who just dropped twenty feet in a mad dash for the right to drive.” I buckle up and start the car. Once Lara is settled, I tear out of the garage. Lara lets out this gasp and grabs onto the handle above the door. She’s never forgotten this big accident I had when I was seventeen. I don’t remember anything about it. One minute we were in my Aston Martin and the next I was in the hospital with Lara sleeping in the chair next to the bed. She’d looked pretty banged up and it was good to wake up to her being okay, but I still feel guilty.

Maybe not guilty enough. It didn’t really do much to make me drive any differently. Life is too short not to have fun, right? But now I have reasons to live so I sort of drive a little safer. A little. Kind of.

“Sam, eyes on the road.”

“Sorry sweetie. You just look kind of funny right now. You’re pale. You should do your research!”

She swallows and shakes her head, staring straight ahead. “I’m okay. Just...oh god.” Lara’s eyes close and I giggle. This never gets old.

“Where are we going?” She’s relaxed a little, since I haven’t run any lights and only nearly hit the median once. Twice. And then a third near miss. I shake my head, not ready to tell her just yet. It’s a surprise, and like all surprises must only be revealed when it’s supposed to be.

I park in front of a store and Lara gets out to take care of the meter while I stand there taking it in. “It’s good to be back! My babies, I missed you all!” I sweep my arms out like I’m trying to hug all the stores.

“We were only gone a few weeks,” Lara says, laughter in her voice.

I flash a grin. “I know but my babies still missed me.”

“So you wanted to go shopping?” She pets her arm around me and I lean in. I hope she’s not disappointed.

“Kind of. I wanted to do us shopping. Stuff for us. I mean the mansion has all kinds of things from the past but there’s no...us. Our future.” I turn in her arms and look into her eyes, trying to convey my meaning with my eyes. “I want us, Lara. I want to fill that place with us. You, and me, and I’m not saying we need to pull out all that old gorgeous furniture, but if we’re going to live there I want it to feel like a home.”

Lara’s smile is a little mysterious. Soft and fond but also a little sad. I’m not sure I get it. She holds up her fingers. “One and two; the study and library aren’t touched. And three, my mother’s art room. But everything else we can make a mixture of old and new.”

How many times will she have to say it before it sinks in? She really does love me. I throw my arms around her and kiss her soundly. “Okay. That’s fair.” I grab her hand and start to pull her alongs. It’s _literally the law_ as newlyweds that we have to look at curtains so that’s the first stop and Lara laughs at me while I hold up increasingly crazy designs.

We settle on something in a dark green with shimmery thread patterns for the bedroom, which’ll kind of set the tone for everything else, but that’s okay with me. We walk towards the next store, with our hands swinging back and forth as we moved.

“I kind of miss the flat.”

“Yeah? I do too, sweetie, but it was way too small for all the stuff we’re collecting.” I glance at her, wondering what she’s getting at.

“The manor is so… _huge_ and lonely. Just the two of us and Winston…And the cats.” She rests her head against mine for a moment. “But you’re right on room. The flat would be too small to live the rest of our lives in….”

Lara is obviously conflicted. On the one hand, it’s hers. I know she wouldn’t want to waste a property by not using it, but she’s right. It’s kind of big and lonely. “That’s why we have to make it homey and warm and welcome and full of people.”

“Full of people?”

“Well, yeah?” I lead her into another store. “I don’t know how yet. But some day it would be nice to have all the bedrooms filled.”

“Right…” Lara’s voice is barely a whisper, and from the look on her face I swear she’s traumatized. I don’t know why until I see a man walk by carrying a kid and then all the breaks in my head and my feet screech to a halt. Lara bumps into me.

Whirling around I put my hands on her shoulders. “Okay I just realized what that sounds like and I don’t mean for us to like have a million kids or anything, just a couple. I meant friends, or a renter, or something. I mean aren’t there a couple old houses that get run for tourists so they can afford upkeep? Couldn’t we do that for the first floor and then donate the proceeds to local charity?”

“I...uh...well I need to think about that.” Lara rubs the back of her neck, looking at me in concern. “...Just a couple?” She exhales and cups my cheeks in her hands. “Sam, we really need to talk about -”

“We’re talking about that later. Lets keep shopping.” I slide out of her grasp and bolt down the aisle. I don’t even know where those thoughts came from and I can’t even blame Himiko for it. Considering the kinds of parents we both had? Why would we ever want kids? I’d be terrible! I can only imagine the thoughts running through Lara’s head. Like what if she died on an expedition?

We’re out most of the day and probably spend more money than most people make in a month, but it’s more of a long term investment deal so Lara doesn’t seem to mind. That, or she’s just indulging me. Once we got past the conversation we didn’t actually have it’s smooth sailing, and we end the day with a nice dinner at a pub with excellent fish and chips.

Lara seems a little distracted so I lean in over my beer. “Sweetie. Lara. Eyes … well eyes anywhere on me would be nice.”

Her eyes snap over to my face, and dip down in appreciation as she flushes. “Sorry.”

I glance around. “Are you staring at a hottie?”

“No, I just can’t shake the feeling we’re being watched.”

“Fuck no.” I slap my hand on the bar. “I’m not having any of that! Not tonight! Not...ever!” 

“Sam…” She grabs my hand. “I haven’t seen anything. It’s probably me being paranoid but …”

I feel myself deflate. “I know. We can’t take any chances. Maybe we should go home.” That, by the way, is the other reason kids will never happen. Even if I kind of do want a little girl with Lara’s eyes and my sense of style.

Lara looks at me a moment, then licks her lips and moves her head towards the ladies room. I blink at her, then glance where she’s looking and raise my eyebrows. “Really? It’s not like...a make Sam feel better thing?”

“You have ten seconds to decide before I start walking to the car,” Lara warns as I feel her hand move up my leg under the bar. Not fair. I’m up and marching towards the bathroom before she gets to five.

We don’t even get home until like after eight. I’m a little tipsy, and Lara’s mood is improved over what it was like in the pub. I’m really kind of happy we can still go into honeymoon mode at the drop of a hat. Well I can. Lara runs cooler most of the time but I know her buttons and I’ve learned to be patient since it takes her longer to warm up.

She’s really warm up still and I have every intention of spending the rest of the night christening the pool with her. Except she has a different idea, pinning me to the wall and kissing me like it’s the end of the world.

“Get a room.”

The voice startles us both and Lara jumps back so quickly that I slide down the wall. I pick myself up and stare at the woman in the hall. “..Reyes?!”

Running up to her I give her a hug. Lara hangs back a little bit, flushing from embarrassment and looking a little awkward. Reyes pats my back and pulls away. “I know you probably had plans for the night, but we came in earlier than we thought we would.”

“It’s all right,” Lara says, holding up her hand. “We don’t see you enough as it is. Are you on holiday? Winston let you in?”

“‘Raya did, actually. It’s sort of a vacation. I wanted to show her things about Roth.”

“Soraya’s here?” I look around, but instead of the mercenary Alisha comes out of the common room. I give her a great big hug. Oh god, all we really needed was Jonas and this would be perfect. I glance at Lara. The house suddenly feels a lot more lively. I can tell she’s seeing that too.

“Yeah, and she brought a couple of friends.” Reyes keeps a straight face, but it’s obvious she doesn’t like talking about Soraya. They have to be here about Roth too. Lara and I had paid to have our friends brought home and buried properly. I wish Alisha could have known Roth was her dad before all this.

“I wish someone had called me,” Lara murmured, slipping past us. “I’ll brew some tea.”

“Winston already took care of that, Lara.” Reyes stops my wife in her tracks.

“Well, I suppose we should greet everyone.” Lara heads towards the common room and the rest of us follow her.The mood feels a lot more somber, and Lara is less happy than she was earlier. I think she’s put out about the tea thing. When we get there, Soraya is sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace with Leda in her lap. The Greek woman is leaning in, whispering in her ear. She waves a hand at us and I wave back.

I spot another woman but before I could get a good look at her giant arms have encircled me. Jonas’ voice booms in my ear. “Samantha! Little Bird!”

An actual squee escapes my mouth as I hug Jonas back. It really _is_ a reunion now! Our fucked up little family. Even Soraya is a part of it now, really. There’s that new girl but she’s hanging back, probably a little nervous or something. There’s a lot of people around and if I wasn’t extroverted that would be a problem for me, so I get it.

I give him a big smooch on the cheek and let him crush Lara for a bit. I think I hear one of her ribs crack but she’ll get better. Probably. It’s a Jonah hug and they’re pretty hard to beat.

Heading over to Soraya and her girlfriend, I leave Lara to the islander’s mercy. They’re so adorable together that I decide not to interrupt them. Everyone is still greeting everyone, except the blonde girl hanging out in the corner. So I figure, hey, I might as well _try out_ being the good host-wife my mother always wanted me to be and approach her.

“Hey. I’m Sam.” I offer my hand out to her. She’s taller than me, and maybe has an inch or two on Lara. Her hair hangs loosely around her face and a bit past her shoulders and is the sort of platinum blonde that comes out of a bottle. She’s wearing all black. Her shirt is low cut and distracting, but she’s standing a little defensively, arms crossed over her chest and shoulders hunched a little. It’s a stance I’m familiar with - Lara stood like that a lot when we went clubbing and I’d left her so I could dance with some guy. New girl is uncomfortable.

She looks at my hand, then at me, and makes a tsch sound before she quickly shakes my hand and returns to her previous stance. I wonder who she came with. She stares at me a moment more, and her accent is American when she finally speaks, “I’m Amanda. I came with, uhm. Jonah.”

I glance back at Jonah, who still has Lara in a death grip. My wife seems to have accepted it and is talking animatedly with Reyes and Alisha. Maybe Reyes doesn’t hate us after all. Jonah glances over and smiles warmly, and I return my eyes to Amanda and grin like an idiot. Oh man Jonah did _good_ for himself! I mean, Amanda is hot. She’s got this dark eye make-up thing going and manages to pull it off almost as well as Soraya does. I need to see if I can work that.

“So you and Jonah are a thing?” Maybe she’s just feeling out of sorts. She’s kind of being introduced to Jonah’s extended family. It has to be scary. Especially when that family includes Reyes and Lara. “How long have you been going out.”

Amanda rolls her eyes, but there’s a faint smile on her lips. “Five months now. He sort of sprang this trip on me last minute. Uhm...I almost said no but I couldn’t miss the opportunity.” She nodded her head in the direction of Jonah and my wife. “He’s told me a lot about her, I mean. I didn’t know Roth. My field of study is social anthropology, so there’s some overlap with her field.”

It takes me a moment to process that. She’s a scientist? In a similar field to Lara? I rub my arms. “Wow. You don’t hear much about other women doing this kind of thing.”

“You didn’t at all until her. So I owe her for raising awareness.” Her tone is so dry that I can’t actually tell if she’s serious or not. Amanda glances back at me and she smiles again. It’s a really pretty one. “She’s probably never heard of me.”

Considering how much research Lara does it’s more likely than Amanda thinks, but I keep my mouth shut. I don’t want to embarrass Lara, even if I do love to talk her up. “I’m usually the one stringing together video instead of learning things. I have to do a lot of research but I kinda rely on Lara to fill me in on details.”

“Yeah. I’ve seen your youtube channel.”

Not the first time I’ve heard that from someone and I’m reminded of Giovanna. I give her the eye. “No comments on the crazy?”

She reached over and pushes up my sleeve. The markings on my arms glow faintly and I yank the cloth back down. Amanda just shrugs a shoulder. “I’ve seen too many strange things to discount anything. I know the signs. ” 

Turning away from me, she walks towards Jonah and Lara. I watch her give the big man a kiss. Me, Lara, Reyes and Jonah have all experiences with the supernatural thanks to Yamatai and those skulls. These people keep coming into our lives because of Shaw and his artifacts. I have this terrible feeling, and Himiko stirs in the back of my consciousness. _Don’t trust anyone_ she tells me. 

“That’s helpful,” I mutter. But no one hears me.


	8. Connecting

It’s still really tense with Reyes. I try to talk to her and when she looks me in the eyes I can only see hardness there. Anger. Sadness. She’s still grieving years after Roth’s death and I can’t judge her for that. It still hurts to think about him and if it had been Sam I don’t know if I could have emotionally survived that. But I make an effort and with Jonah around Reyes’ walls start to come down. He has that way of making one comfortable.

Soraya and Leda are pretty wrapped up in themselves, so it’s just the three of us from the Endurance until Jonah’s girlfriend interjects herself. She’s a really pretty blonde, with intelligent, light eyes. Her grip is firm when I shake her hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“I’ve heard a lot about you,” she replies, after introductions have been officially made. Jonah looks a little guilty and I give him a reassuring smile. Amanda smirks and pats his arm. “He’s learned when to shut up.”

“I think I understand.” There were plenty of times I just didn’t want to hear about some boy from Sam, and that was when we _weren’t_ dating. “I hope most of that is good.”

“Little Bird, you know I couldn’t say a bad thing about you.”

“Only if you consider stubbornness a bad thing,” I reply. 

Jonah laughs, “Stubbornness is only bad some of the time.” 

Amanda’s face furrows briefly but the expression is gone before I can figure out if she’s irritated by our banter or not. “I wanted to actually talk to you about your work, if you have the time. Our fields have some crossover and between what Jonah’s told me, your youtube channel and what I’ve dug up on my own I’ve become a little fascinated by your discoveries. I have some questions.”

There’s something else in her eyes now. The way she looks at me, the way she studies me is a little unnerving. As though she’s trying to decide what to make of me compared to whatever Lara Croft she’s built up in her head. I try to ignore the impression that I’ve been found wanting, and focus on what’s important. _Archaeology_. Jonah gets this expression on his face. He knows the can of worms Amanda just opened.

I almost rub my hands together. “I’m willing to answer almost any question you have. Fair warning once I start talking, I’m not going to shut up. Where would you like me to start?”

“In your book you talked extensively about the dehumanization that the Solarii went through on Yamatai, but it feels like you left some things out. Did you ever feel like you were becoming them?” The entire room goes quiet. Reyes is giving Amanda the most heated look I’ve ever seen on her face, while Jonah just looks sad. I can’t see Sam’s face from where I’m standing but it probably mirrors Jonah’s. 

My jaw is tight. I can’t answer that right now, not with the other survivors in the room. I’m not even sure of my own feelings on the matter and the way she says it makes me want to hit her. “Maybe we should try a _different_ subject.”

Amanda looks around, realizing she’s stepped on a mine and holds up her hands in surrender. “Sorry. Didn’t realize it was something that still bothered you.”

“Fuck you’re dumb,” Reyes mutters, and I have to agree with the mechanic. Either Amanda really didn’t think through it or she deliberately brought it up to see our reactions.

Either way, I need to get away before I give her even more of a show. Sam still has a scar from when she’d startled me while I was writing about Yamatai and I can feel the old ghosts creeping around the edge of my consciousness. . “I need some air.” I pivot and walk quickly out of the common room. 

It takes several minutes to go down the hall and outside. The air is crisp and I probably should have brought a jacket. I make my way to the manor’s gardens and get lost amongst the plants. They’ve already bloomed and in the moonlight it’s a beautiful and calming sight. I sit down on a low wall and rub my hands on my knees. I should be over this by now. Writing that book had been supposed to be cathartic but all it had done was open old wounds. But I don’t regret it. It answered a lot of questions people had about the island.

Events in Turkey are still fresh on my mind and Amanda’s question is making me wonder if I _had_ become like those madmen. I’d reacted with violence so easily. I always react with violence when threatened and it’s worse when Sam is in danger. I nearly lost her. She might seem shallow but Sam really has infinite patience with me. I don’t know how I haven’t chased her away by now.

“Shit…” I lift my hands to my hair and tug at my pony-tail. Himiko. Her image superimposes itself over Sam’s face in my mind’s eye. The lightning she called down in Egypt, the storm in Turkey. I haven’t really sat down and thought about Turkey yet. As soon as we’d landed back in London I’d buried myself in work, and then Sam dragged me out and now this.

“Lara?” Reyes isn’t who I expected. I glance up when I hear her voice and blink my eyes to clear them. What did she want? I’m expecting a barb or something about Roth, but instead she sits next to me and awkwardly pats my shoulder. “Don’t let her get to you. I don’t know _what_ Jonah sees in her. Besides her tits.”

I laugh, and almost feel bad about laughing. “She’s intelligent, and I’m sure she’s a nice person, but she’s kind of.” I search for the right word.

“Kind of a _bitch_.” She eyes me steadily. “What’s really bothering you about this? It can’t just be that fucking island. You’ve never handled questions ‘bout this shit that badly before.”

“There was that time I punched a tabloid reporter.”

“That don’t count.”

I grin at her. “You’re not exactly the first person I’d expect to want to talk to me about this stuff.”

Her expression grows a little distant, and she looks down at her hands. “Guess I figure… Well we’re gonna visit Roth tomorrow. And I know what he’d say. Life’s too fucking short to waste it on grudges.”

“We told you about what happened on the way to Thinis right?” I don’t relax yet, but I can feel the tension easing out of me.

“Yeah, the lightning? Terrifying, but I trust you, Lara. We don’t always get along but I trust you when it comes to these things.” Reyes seems sincere, so I nod my head and launch into what happened on our honeymoon. I skim over the stuff with the girl in Japan and I leave Tibet out because I don’t feel it’s relevant. But I tell her everything about Italy and Turkey. Giovanna and the Vatican, what we found in that book, and the fight in the tomb.

“She’s back, and she’s herself, but I’m fucking scared I’m going to lose her. I don’t know what I’m going to do if that happens again.”

She’s silent, and staring at me and I wonder if she’s regretting bringing Alisha with her. Finally she flares her nose and I can visualize her counting to ten in her head. “Then you do what you have to Lara. But I’ll talk to Sam. Maybe I can do something. We’re all this fucked up family and…” She shrugs and she doesn’t need to finish.

I lean back and look up at the sky. “Thanks Joslin.”

“If you want my advice, and I’m gonna give it to you anyway, you need to figure out what this artifact shit is, and take it all out. That Shaw fucker you told me about isn’t gonna sit around doing nothing while you dick around and Sam’s time is probably limited.”

“Thanks, Joslin,” I reply, much less enthusiastically.

“Okay. So this was… a talk.” She got up. “See you inside. I heard Soraya and Leda making a bet on which of us would hit Amanda first.”

After she’s gone, I’m left in silence again, with a lot to think about. How to handle the situation with Shaw, and with Himiko. They’re both related. Deal with one and I think I can deal with the other. I glance back towards the mansion. They all depend on me finishing this.

There’s a footfall behind me. I’m on my feet, and ready to engage before I recognized Amanda. Sighing, I relax my shoulders. She holds up her hands. “Sorry. I guess I shouldn’t startle you. I wanted to … I’m sorry I brought it up. It’s one thing to read about something with an emotional detachment and then talk to someone who’s still attached.”

“Apology accepted. I could have reacted better, but I was expecting questions about more recent events. They’re not quite as traumatic.” I wanted to ask her something. She took the supernatural in stride. Dating Jonah, she’d kind of have to. Even I accept he has some kind of sensitivity to spiritual matters. 

The blonde folds her arms, then takes a seat on the wall. I join her after a moment. Like Reyes, there’s a wall up around Amanda, but what built it is a mystery. Part of me is curious to find out. “Why don’t you answer a question for me first? You’re really accepting about some of the stranger things I’ve seen.”

A ghost of a smile dances across Amanda’s face and her eyes get that far-off look I’m so familiar with seeing on other survivors. “Because I’ve seen some of it too. On a dig in Brazil, and in a few other places.”

Now that perks my interest. “Brazil?” We’d been near the border to Brazil when we were in Peru.

“Yes. On a dig near Rio Branco just after I got out of Oxford.” When she nods her head her hair bobs off of her shoulders. She looks a lot less standoffish, now.

“That’s a few hundred miles away from the site Sam and I found.” But that shouldn’t be surprising, we’ve encountered these artifacts and creatures all over the world. “What did you find there? Were you looking for Z?”

“We found some kind of statue. It was very large and very old, but we didn’t really have a chance to study it before we were attacked.” Amanda was still stuck in the past, and it doesn’t take me much to understand she was reliving what happened. “I thought it was my friend until it got close. Those eyes…”

I shudder along with her. “Like staring into a Lovecraftian abyss, isn’t it?”

Amanda finally glances at me. I could read pain in her eyes. Pain that is heart- _wrenchingly_ familiar. “Yeah, or something a lot worse. I never ran so fast in my life. When I got out of the ruins I realized I was alone. I didn’t think, I ran right back in but by the time I found her, she was gone.”

“I’m so sorry.” I touch Amanda’s arm. I don’t need to think that far back. Those things have killed people right in front of me. 

“It’s… okay. This was years ago. I’m over it. Run into them sometimes, but I try to work alone now. I still haven’t figured out where they come from.” She jerked away from my touch, shoulders hunching forward. My hand hangs there for a moment before dropping to my lap. She’s not over it, just like I’ll never be over Alex, Roth and Grim. Even making new friends doesn’t take the pain away - it just makes it a little worse, knowing they’re not here to meet these new people. 

I think I know and maybe she can confirm my theory. “The black water. Is there always some kind of black water that you have to come in contact with to go any further?”

Her eyebrows quirk up. “Yes. Yes! That has to be it!” She grabs my shoulders and shakes me. “Why didn’t I see that before?”

“It makes sense as a kind of defense mechanism. I’ve no idea how it works. Besides the face carvings and the artifacts, it’s the only common link between all the sites.” Maybe she can critique my theory. I lean closer to her. “There are a few things we keep out of the videos. The full nature of the artifacts and my theories about them.”

Amanda rolls her eyes, but now there’s a smile on her face. “Are you going to keep being a tease or are you going to tell me?”

I like her like this, with her guard down. We probably would have met much sooner if I’d gone to Oxford like I’d planned originally. I might very well have gone on that dig with her, or another one. Despite that, I barely know her, so I choose my words carefully. “The artifacts are objects of power. Shaw, who I’m sure you’ve heard of if you’ve followed the videos, believes that the power can be transferred. Having witnessed _first hand_ a transference ritual I’m a believer too.”

We’re hunched over like two schoolgirls talking about … whatever normal girls talk about. It’s kind of exciting talking to another archaeologist about this sort of thing. Another woman who’s field of study is the ancient world. As attentive as Sam can be, she doesn’t geek out quite the same way I do about it. “I keep coming across three numbers. Seven, thirteen and one hundred and eight. Seven prime artifacts, thirteen secondary ones, and a total of one hundred and eight if you count less powerful items.”

“Seven and thirteen are both fairly common across a whole spectrum of colors,” the American replies. “The last number you usually see in Eastern religions.”

“Exactly. I’m predicting a trip to South Asia this year.” I think back to our time in Tibet, and Dolma. I should check up on her and make sure she’s doing okay. “A lot of the clues my father discovered point in that direction. 

“Do you think this Shaw person is going to beat you there? Do you even know what you’re fighting him for, Lara?” Amanda has this intense sort of look on her face, but I regard her evenly while I decide on my answer.

“He’s seeking these artifacts for personal gain, and he had a man hurt me, so there’s some personal skin in this game.” Glancing back at the lit windows of the house, my eyes study the shadowed figures within. “And every person in that house is in danger because of me.”

The blonde’s eyebrows raise again. “Most people sound like egotistical dickbags when they say things like that.”

“And what do I sound like?”

A smirk crosses her face, and she doesn’t answer. I guess that means I sound like an egotistical dickbag. “I’ll keep that in mind the next time I make such declarative statements, Amanda. Shall we move on?”

We talk about Peru and Costa Rica for several minutes and I sketch in the dirt one of the faces I’d seen carved into the stones. It matches what Amanda remembers from her own explorations. She must be excited to talk to someone who doesn’t dismiss her out of hand, because I definitely am.

I’m staring at the drawings in the dirt when it hits me. “There was no water or carved faces in Thinis. In Turkey the water had been drained, but in Thinis it was like it had never been there.”

“Is Thinis unrelated then?” Amanda has gotten hard to read again. I don’t know what I said or did but it’s a little frustrating. Is this what everyone else has to deal with when around me? 

“No, I think it’s related, but not in the same way. It didn’t feel the same. There wasn’t that sense of unease that hangs around the other ruins, or around the island.” I get to my feet and offer my hand to help Amanda up. She looks at it, then stands without taking it. We start back for the house.

The blonde’s voice is quiet, and she sounds reflective. “Maybe there’s two sets of artifacts. Two powers vying for control.”

“It’s within the realm of possibility,” I reply, glancing at her out of the corner of my eyes. “But I’ve learned to accept that just about everything is.”


	9. Those Words Never Said

My legs are a little wobbly, but we’d both been pretty determined to make up for our plans getting altered last night so I’m okay with that. Lara’s still passed out in bed, which I’ll take as a compliment. I linger in the doorway to watch her sleep. Her hair is down, splayed out over her head and back and her left arm is hanging off the bed. Quietly, I close the door and pad over to the bathroom.

Reyes and company are going to visit Roth’s grave and I don’t know if Lara will accompany them. She goes once a month, and the one time I’d asked her about it she told me she liked to get advice from him. Maybe he doesn’t actually answer her but it sounds cathartic. I like to think he somehow nudged her in the direction of proposing to me.

I finish my thing and head back into the hallway, deftly stepping around one of the kittens as he tries to trip me up. We’d named him Grim, because he’s a grizzled fellow and for some reason he’s gotten it into his head that my legs are the best legs in the house. Which is only half true. Because have you _seen_ Lara’s legs? Picking him up, I hear some rattling around the corner. It’s coming from Lara’s study. Armed only with a cat, I sneak to the corner and peer around. There’s a person trying to pick their way into the study.

“Hey!” Brandishing a kitten like some kind of furry weapon, I reveal myself. “What do you think you’re doing? Alisha?”

Alisha jumps back, then fidgets with her fingers while trying to hide a set of lockpicks. I’m a totally gobsmacked. “First, your mom is gonna kill you. Second, Lara is going to kill you. Third, who gave you those? And fourth, you were using them wrong.”

“You can pick locks?” She starts to edge farther from the door, and I follow her. Darting in, I swap kitten for lockpicks and inspect them. 

“Remind me to tell you how I ended up at boarding school. These are pretty good.” Deciding I’ll keep them as punishment, I fold my arms and give her my sternest look. “ _What_ did you think you were doing?”

“I don’t…” She shrugged her shoulders and hung her head, hiding her face in her brown hair and hugging the cat. “You know how you talk about something pulling you? That’s what it felt like. Something pulling me.”

The hackles on the back of my neck go straight up and I look back over at the door. “Do me a favor and try to ignore that feeling?”

I put my hand on her back and start to guide her away from the study. It was also a good time to change the subject. “So what did you name your cats and how big of a cow did Reyes have?”

Alisha smirks. “She threatened to shoot you both.”

That’s better than I expected. I get Alisha settled in the kitchen and Winston already has breakfast prepared. So I leave her in his capable hands and run back to our bedroom. Lara’s rolled onto her back, one arm thrown above her head and the other wrapped around my pillow. The blanket is pulled down and it’s both adorable and kind of hot. “Oh my god, Lara…”

Unable to resist, I grab my camera. “For obvious reasons this goes in the personal collection and she’ll kill me when she wakes up, but just look at how adorable my wife is. It’s nearly ten A.M. and she’s still in bed, which might be a new record.” I turn the camera to point it at my own face and add with righteous pride, “She might be sick but more likely a certain someone wore her out last night.”

A pillow smacks me in the head and I turn the camera back towards her. “And there she is, rising from her grave.”

Her hair is askew and tangled and she has the blanket pulled up to cover her modesty and she’s giving me this grumpy little half-hearted glare. “If that ever sees the public eye they’ll never find your body, Sam.”

“Oh sweetie, don’t be silly. Besides, some day I’m going to get you to let me film us bumping uglies together and if you’re camera shy that’ll never happen.” Priorities. I have them.

“Mrs. Nishimura-Croft,” Lara starts, getting to her feet and stalking towards me with the blanket. “That’ll never, ever happen so you might as well give up in the idea now!” She flings the blanket over my head and ignores my squeal as she lifts me up in the air. Next thing I know, I’m upended onto the bed. I love this woman. I love everything about her. How she can go from serious to silly, goofy to dangerous, light-hearted to intense. Her fingers find my sides and she has me at her mercy, tangled in the sheets. Her tickling has me laughing so hard that I’m scared I’ll throw up.

A knock on the door brings the real world into our little bubble. I lay in the remains of our blankets while Lara pulls a robe on to see who it is. I hear Winston and they speak in low, serious tones. Damn it. I sit up to find Lara approaching me with a worried look on her face. There’s something in her eyes… “Sam, you better get dressed. Your mother is here. It’s something serious but she wouldn’t say what. She’s in the parlour.”

“What?” I’m so tangled in the sheets that I fall out of bed and Lara helps me up. I’ve never thrown clothing on so fast before, but I still take the time to try to look presentable. The world could be ending and my mom would still judge me if I wasn’t somehow perfect.

This is just so weird. I make sure my hair isn’t messed up and then walk quickly through the hallway. My mother is seated elegantly on a couch, sipping at some tea that Winston no doubt prepared out of thin air. I’m too worried to marvel at the ninja butler, and instead sit across from my mother. 

She has sharp features. I get my face from my dad, but my body from my mom, which is probably a good thing because could you imagine my dad in a bikini? Nightmare fuel, right there. Chewing on my lip and trying to keep my hands still, I wait for my mom to set her tea down and tell me why she’s here. It’s suddenly hard to breathe when I realize she’s wearing black. All black. My mother _never_ wears black. She’s a drama queen who loves her colors. A true Diva and this is freaking me out. I swallow a gulp of air. “Mom. Hi. I wasn’t expecting you. We were, uhm. Wife things.”

Hand to god I feel like I’m going to faint while my mother sits there watching me, in a stylish black dress. Finally she sets the tea down. Finally, she _talks_ and the words are clear and blunt. “Toru is dead. He passed away suddenly two nights ago.”

She’d waited two days to tell me but then she’d come in person. Or they were already in town. Or something. I don’t know. It feels almost wrong having her here instead of hearing her voice over the phone. At least then I could be _pissed_ instead of...whatever it is I’m feeling right now. My head spins and the room is suddenly blurry. I feel strong, calloused hands on my shoulders and lean back into them. 

I know I need to speak, need to say _something_ but my throat feels like it’s closing up. Lara, thank god for Lara because she as the sense to talk. “What happened?”

“We won’t know until the autopsy.” 

My hands are shaking and I think I might fall apart without Lara here. I spent half my life trying to get my dad’s attention and now that I’ve had a _taste_ of it, he’s gone. Lara told me over and over again that I needed to reconnect with my parents. I never listened to her. I didn’t give my dad a chance because I never expected him to ever _be_ there and now it’s too late to make up for it and cross the bridge we were building. I’m _pissed_.

But it’s not that that gets me. It’s when I look at my mom and see how carefully held together she is. There are all these _cracks_ forming in the way her jaw quivers. The bags under her eyes show through the cover-up and when she picks her tea up again the cup shakes so lightly that I must have missed it the first time. She’s barely holding on. Even her voice was wavering.

And that’s it. She and dad still loved each other. Even after everything, even after all that time they spent apart doing their stupid work when they should have spent it together…she’s hurting. She’s hurting and her mask is cracking and maybe, maybe she’s not totally the bitch I’ve always thought she was.

Lara nudges me. I push up off the chair and move towards the couch and my mom. Sitting next to her, I wrap my arms around her. Only when Lara closes the door behind her do I feel my mom’s shoulders start to shake. She gasps in great heaving sobs and for the first time I miss my dad not because he was never there, but because even after _everything_ I loved him. A few hot tears streak my cheeks, but I feel more angry than anything. My goldfish died and I bawled like a baby but my own dad’s dead and I’m just so fucking _pissed_. I guess it’s better than being numb.

The numb actually comes later, once the anger has burned out and my mom pretends she didn’t just sob all over me. She’s exhausted, so we let her rest in a guest room while I wander aimlessly through the manor. I’m drained, and numb, and I don’t have any destination in mind. I just need to keep moving. Lara catches up to me. I feel her hand on my arm and pull away.”

“Sam, I…”

“Give me a little bit okay?” I look at her and she looks both hurt and understanding. I know she just wants to try to make me feel better. But she’s been here. She knows loss better than _anyone_ but I need to be alone right now.

“I’ll… be in my study then...the others are back from Roth’s….” She gestures over her shoulder as though indicating the direction she’s going to be going in. “I love you, Sam.” 

I watch her go, promising to myself once again that our marriage is going to be different. We’ll balance work and personal. I don’t want to wonder when Lara is gone, if we’d wasted time we could have had together. It scares me how easy that is to think, though. That Lara will go before me. I can’t even think of a reason it could be the other way around, not with her life style.

Lara doesn’t even complain when we take a private jet back to Japan. She holds my hand, and we talk with my mom. Dad’s absence kind of hangs over everything, but she’s trying to talk and after a few false starts and another nudge from Lara I start to let her in.

My wife is wonderful. She gives me distance when I need it and holds me when I need that. She’s put aside the quest we’re on so that I can deal with my family matter. Not entirely, I’m pretty sure Soraya and Leda agreed to keep hunting while we’re in Japan, but I’m not going to get pissy about that. I mean, it’s life or death. Sun Queens and riddles and magic. That she’s willing to give me this time is really amazing, even if I don’t know how I feel about it. My dad’s dead. I can’t wrap my head around that. I just can’t. 

Between planning the wedding and the past two days I’ve spoken to my mom more than in the previous 25 years of my life. It’s the attention I’ve always craved if not the attention I actually wanted. She’s stubborn and opinionated and overdramatizing everything so this funeral is going to be a _big deal_. I don’t sleep well the night before and I’m up and ready to go before Lara’s even dragged herself into the shower. I’ve got this weird nervous energy and the sun is hiding behind the clouds. But Himiko doesn’t make herself known.

The house feels wrong. It’s quiet and empty without Dad and his endless business meetings. I wander out into the gardens. They’re meticulously kept - not by my parents of course, but they pay for the very best. I’ve always thought they were lonely and creepy. Too perfect and too impersonal, but today there’s a cold breeze ruffling the hem of my black dress. My heels are too high, and I’m sure I’m showing too much leg, but even in death I’m not going to give my dad the satisfaction of changing who I am. I’ll be there for him, though. A few years ago I might have skipped out on it. Hey. I’m growing up a little.

There aren’t too many fond memories of this place from when I was little. We moved around a lot. There’s a huge house in LA, another in Paris. But when I was four or five we were staying here for the summer. My mom had some kind of shoot and dad was closing a big deal on buying some network in Korea but I didn’t care. We were all together. Except we weren’t and it was so lonely. 

I was in this garden, walking in circles. It was way, way past my bedtime but no one ever cared. Even the nanny just let me do whatever I wanted. I ran across my parents, standing in the garden. They were holding each other and I think mom was crying and they both looked so sad. I never saw them being affectionate before, and I rarely saw it after. Even now, I don’t know what happened. It was just the clearest sign that they genuinely loved each other. I could have gone up to them, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to get in the way, because I always felt like I was in the way.

“I haven’t been in this garden since you were a little girl.” My mom’s voice startles me and I jump.

Hugging myself, I look at her and shrug. “Me neither. We weren’t here enough.” I could say something biting. More yelling about them never being there, but I don’t have the energy. Dad’s gone and it feels like so much time has been wasted. I mean fuck he’s never going to see his grandkids. Maybe I’d have even given him a chance with them. Yeah, Sam, you _really_ need to have that talk with Lara don’t you.

Mom’s eyes drop a little bit, before she tosses her hair with a flourish. “Samantha. I know we never told you this enough. Maybe not at all. But we’re proud of you. Your father was proud of you.”

I don’t know what I expected her to say. Not that. Definitely not that and it just triggers something in me. “You had a _great_ way of showing it! Yeah, lets ignore our daughter for _years_. Ship her off to merry old England and just give her an unlimited credit card, that’ll make her happy and adjusted! Did you ever call? Send a fucking _birthday_ card? Did you? You never visited, you never _asked me_ to visit! It was like you never wanted to see me again! Oh you’re _so_ fucking proud of me, aren’t you.”

The wind is picking up a little. My mom just has this...sad expression on her face. “Did _you_? What stopped you from calling? What stopped you from telling us we were anything more than a trust fund to you?”

The wind dies down and I feel like I’ve been punched in the gut. “That’s… not _fair_. I was just a kid. I just wanted you to _love_ me.”

Mom looks suddenly vulnerable. Sad and chastined and _frail_. She sounds tired and in pain. “I know I failed you. That’s why I tried so hard to accept your marriage. It made you happy, and you really can’t do much better than Lara Croft. Maybe I didn’t entirely understand it. I thought it might have been a phase. But I know I failed you and I could at least do right with that. Toru was… he didn’t accept it. It’s just so hard to. But we tried. I’m trying.”

“I didn’t even expect him to _be_ there,” I say bitterly, trying to blink my eyes dry. “Then he’s...he actually did it. He walked me down the aisle. Why?”

“When your father says he loves you, he never uses _words_.”

I wish he did. Just once. Just to hear it once, from either of them but especially my dad. My mom is critical and judgemental but she at least looked my way every once in awhile. But dad...his disapproval was that silent kind. The killer kind where if he even looked in my direction I knew it was a bad thing because then I was in trouble.

“One day doesn’t make up for a lifetime,” I tell her, but I can’t put any venom into my tone. It’s like pissing into the wind, there’s really no point. Hugging myself, I add, “But he picked a great day to try.”

Our eyes meet and I see the pain there. I can’t… ever be happy with how my childhood was, I can’t ever forgive them for ignoring me. And maybe part of that is my fault. Maybe they cared more than they showed and I refused to see it. Mom’s trying. She looks like she has something else to say, but then it’s time to go.

Except for when she broke the news I’ve been mostly numb this whole time. Usually I thrive on there being a lot of people, and the funeral seems to have everyone that my dad ever met. It’s bigger than our wedding, which isn’t surprising. Lara’s uncomfortable around all these people so when she holds my hand it’s as much for her sake as mine. Mom’s on my left, and Lara’s on my right. The service takes a long time, and three of his longest friends or partners have platitudes that I only half hear because my mom has a death grip on my hand. Reluctantly, I let go of Lara’s hand to pat my mom’s, and under her stoic diva face I think I actually see some gratitude.

This whole thing has me emotionally and physically exhausted. I just want to dip into the liquor cabinet and crawl into bed, but we’re barely back home when Dad’s lawyer arrives. I hear Lara through the partition, “Can’t this wait? It’s been a very trying day for both of them.”

A good spouse _and_ daughter-in-law. For the first time that day I manage a smile. Then I know I have to brace myself. I peek out, “I’m guessing it’s dad’s will. It’s okay Lara, we might as well get this over with now.”

“Are you sure? You both looked so-”

I take her hands and squeeze them. “It’s okay. Go get mom, I’ll take him to dad’s meeting room.”

Lara smiles at me. It’s soft and sweet and she’s looking at me like she’s seeing a new part of me. Then she nods. I turn to the lawyer and bow my head. “Please follow me.” Hey look, dad. I can be an adult!

I arrange with the staff to have tea brought in. When I get back, Mom and Lara are already seated, leaving the seat between them open. I give them a suspicious look because I’d wanted to put mom between us for more support, but sit and wait expectantly. It’s the usual dry legalese at first, with a few interesting tidbits about dad’s company. They apparently own a big camera company now.

Then things get weird. My uncle gets twenty percent of the company. And me? I got the rest.

I can’t even brain that. I’m sitting there stunned, trying to process the _scope_ of that. Nishimura Media Group is gigantic. I can’t run a company. I can’t even balance my own checkbook! Panicking, I look at mom, “What about you??”

“I’ve already got my own fortune, Samantha. The only things I want are mementos.” She takes my hand and squeezes it. “Toru and I discussed this a long time ago. The company is yours. Your Uncle can run it, but you can take control or let it operate the way it always has. I know you have your own career to think about.”

Giving things seemed to be the only way he could show love. He gave me away, and now he’s giving me everything else. It’s just too much. I wrench out of my chair and run out of the room. Lara calls out behind me but I just can’t. I just _can’t_.

_When your father says he loves you, he never uses words._

All I ever wanted _was_ those words.


	10. Looking Forward

Sam keeping her distance is a little painful but what she’s going through I can understand. Having one’s family ripped away unexpectedly is hard, especially when you’re just beginning to rebuild burned bridges. When I lost my parents I was inconsolable. It hadn’t helped that no one knew for sure if they were alive or dead. I’m glad Sam know me then, we might never have become friends. I pushed everyone away.

What I can do is be silent support when she needs it. Handle travel arrangements. Our pending expeditions go on hold, and I hate to do it but I have to ask Soraya to do some of the work without me. I don’t think she minds, but I want to be out there too. Sam’s still in danger, we’re _all_ still in danger. I find myself trying to walk a tightrope and I can only pray I don’t fall off.

My wife keeps going from angry to sad. She’s pissed at her father. She’s always been angry at him but now she’s lost one of the things she could focus her negative emotions on. I’ve pushed her time and again to talk to her parents. To let them into her heart, to give them more chances. And there’ve been plenty of times where I regret it. Her parent aren’t the easiest people to talk to, or open yourself up to. But one day they could be gone and then she’d never know how they felt. She’d have regrets. I’m witnessing that right now. She has regrets and her anger is as much at herself as at her father and eventually she’ll realize this. 

The day of the funeral is stressful. I don’t think Sam slept. She was up before I was, which is rare. Her eyes are red and she’s used makeup to reduce the puffiness, but I find her talking to her mother and leave them be. That’s a relationship she can save and one that both parties seem to be willing to try for. It’s just such a pity it took her father’s death to do that. I think they were headed in this direction already, thanks to the wedding.

The service itself is long and a little dry. It doesn’t tell me much about either Mr. or Mrs. Nishimura’s religious beliefs and I’ve always been too polite to ask. Sam might tell me, but my curiosity will have to wait. It’s the first funeral I’ve been to since the memorial for Roth and the rest of the Endurance crew and that wound reopens, just a little.

Death happens, whether it’s at the hand of a killer or nature or illness. It’s inevitable and I muse on that on the way back to the Nishimura household. One day, everything I do will catch up to me. I take Sam’s hand and squeeze it. Not today, and not anytime soon. So many people gave us this chance that I must fight for it.

Neither Sam nor myself expected the chance that her father gives her. Our now combined fortune is _staggering_ and something that’s going to need to be discussed. I’ve finally claimed my own and it’s useful in dealing with our artifacts. The rest of the money I have a plan for. But I can’t ask Sam not to take hers, in fact I’ll urge her to do so.

It’s not just the money. He left her the _company_. Something that will make a huge impact, something that will change our _lives_. It’s suddenly a very real possibility that our careers will take us in opposite directions. All I can really do is keep my feelings to myself for now and let Sam figure out what she wants for herself.

Once the will is finished being read and the three of us are left to our own devices, I turn and put my arms around Sam. She sags against me. “Don’t make any decisions just yet. Give it all some time to sink in and then you can figure out what you want to do.”

Sam nods her head, and murmurs, “We. We’ll figure out what to do.”

I don’t argue, nodding against her hair, and hold her a moment longer before letting go. Getting to my feet, I’m suddenly swept into my mother-in-laws arms. She’s a tall woman and my face is throat level. “Thank you. This would be a lot harder without you.”

“You’re welcome, Mrs. Nishimura.”

“Call me Liliana,” She says. It could be worse, she could ask me to call her mother and I don’t know how I’d politely get out of that. Sam is looking at us with a conflicted expression on her face, until Liliana gestures for her to join us. I can’t say I’ve ever been part of a family hug before, but it’s kind of nice.

Her mother ‘retires’ a few minutes later, and I walk slowly with Sam back towards her room. 

“Fuck.” I almost don’t hear it, but when I look at Sam she’s crying. “Just fuck I can’t believe he did that. What the _fuck_?! I don’t know how to run a company! I just want to film things, make documentaries and movies!”

“You still can. Your mother said your Uncle can handle the day to day,” I point out. Stopping us, I pull her against me. “It’s not the end of the world, Sam. He obviously trusted you enough to do the right thing by the company.”

“Maybe I can bring it kicking and screaming into this millenium,” she murmurs. I can’t help my grin. That sounds more like her. “More online media, maybe even work towards competing with Youtube.”

“What about setting up a division to handle things like documentaries,” I suggest. “Your baby project while your uncle handles the rest of it.”

“He’s adventurous. He’d be willing to bring in new ideas and run with them...”

“He did help fund Yamatai.”

Sam laughs. It’s a tired laugh, but it’s something. “I still can’t believe he turned a profit. But I guess since he didn’t own the Endurance and insurance covered most of that anyway…And then there’s your book.”

I nod. It hadn’t been part of the deal but half the profits went towards her Uncle’s investment. The rest went to Alisha’s college fund. Reyes had argued about it, but only half-heartedly. What she doesn’t know is I transferred all of Roth’s pension and insurance into a trust fund for when Alisha turns eighteen. I’ll get an earful then, but it’ll be worth it. “So what now?” 

“Well we have more money than god. And since it’s mine we’re gonna spend it however I want.” Sam puts her hand over my mouth before I can protest. “And I’ll be reasonably responsible, okay? I have some...ideas. Like how we talked about turning the manor into some kind of home for kids. I think we should just build a place specifically for that.”

“Okay.” I kiss her. I love that idea, it _thrills_ me and I can help fund that as well. We just need to find a place most in need. I think about that girl in Tibet, Dolma. Maybe one there, and one in England.

“Also,” she adds, and I pull my head back to look at her. The way she said that word makes me think what she’s going to add is going to be something I’m _not_ going to like. “I’m buying you a ship.”

I’m right. I _don’t_ like that. “Sam! I don’t need a ship! We can hire one when we need one. Do you have any idea how expensive they are to buy, let alone maintain?”

“I do, actually.” She looks at me stubbornly, so I stare back at her just as stubbornly.

“ _Lara_. Think about it. You spent half your childhood on the Endurance. All those places you’ve been. There’s so many sites we can get to and have everything we need right on board!” The new head of Nishimura Media Group reaches over to finger my pendant. “It’s not just for you, either. I can have an entire studio on board.”

“You’ve been thinking about this for awhile, haven’t you.”

“A little.” Smiling sheepishly, Sam threads her arms around my neck. “It’s just that something like this is so big I never really thought I’d have a chance to consider it. But your idea. A documentary and film division, dedicated to making new content… it would be a business expense. We could even put a helicopter on board. No more worrying about trying to charter boats or planes, the world will be yours for the taking.”

It’s tempting. I’d be a fool not to to be tempted. Every point she makes is a valid one. A ship built to my very exacting specifications, a portable lab, a moving home. “Sam…”

“Call it a wedding present for the both of us.” She gives me smile while I stand there dumbstruck, trying to find a reason, any reason to say no.

“The Endurance cost millions, Sam. And she was twenty years old. A new ship, custom built with all the bells and whistles we’d both want…” Just guessing at the math in my head is making my stomach twist. That doesn’t even include _upkeep_.

“Business expense,” She repeats. “Lara, let me at least look into this? Maybe you’re right. Maybe it’s too expensive, but…” She gestures around, though I don’t know what exactly she’s trying to emphasize. “Maybe it can be Dad’s way of making up for everything. Shit, this probably is. And the more I think about it the more I like the idea of heading a smaller division and letting someone else steer the big ship.”

“That’s probably wise, you can barely drive a car,” I reply. Our arms wrap around each other and Sam rolls her eyes at me. 

“I didn’t mean a literal ship, Lara.”

“No matter, no one should ever let you drive anything,” I reply, grinning at her. She shakes her head, giving me this look, before she sags into my arms. We stand there for a long time, my face in her hair. She’s exhausted, even I’m exhausted, but I pick her up suddenly and carry her into her room. Kicking the door closed behind us, I set her on the bed and start to undress her.

“Lara, I got this,” she protests, but I don’t pay attention. Sam gets stripped and tucked in, and a few moments later I’ve joined her. Neither of us are in the mindset for anything but holding each other, but I nuzzle Sam’s shoulder and kiss it lightly. 

“Get some rest. We’ll talk about this more in the morning.” I don’t want to let her sell me on this idea without some sleep and some space. Today was emotional, and emotional days are never a good time to be making important decisions.

We spend a solid week in Japan. Sam has too much to do and I find myself preoccupied when Soraya rings me up. The mercenary has picked up the trail on another artifact and while Sam deals with her business matters Soraya and I make our own plans. She’s positive that we’ll find something in Iraq. The number of archaeological wonders there is already pretty impressive, but she thinks we’ll find the Hanging Gardens.

I’ve learned to damper my internal skeptic, and the chance to find an ancient wonder of world is something I’m going to jump at. It’s _exciting_. I tell her that I’ll book a flight for early next week, and she agrees to meet us in Baghdad. I just need to tell Sam and see how she reacts. I’m praying she wants the distraction as much as I think she needs it.

I catch her in the garden, threading my arms around her waist as she leans back into my embrace. She used a new shampoo this morning and it smells really nice. “I thought you’d be busy.”

“Taking a break. Not much left to do. Everything is kinda in limbo right now.” Sam fits into me so well. Like our bodies were made for each other. It’s not the first time I’ve had the observation, but it’s suddenly very obvious.

“Well, I was thinking it’s time for the inaugural expedition for your new learning division.” 

Sam turns in my arms and fixes me with a suspicious look. “What did you do?”

“Soraya thinks we’ll find an artifact in Iraq. We’re going looking for the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, Sam!” My excitement starts to infect her and she rubs her hands up and down my arms.

“Oh god, I think that’s exactly what I need.”

“What, no shopping expedition? Are you turning into me?” My cheekiness gets the smack it deserves, which only makes my smile larger.

Sam slips out of my grasp. “No, but film therapy is exactly what this girl needs. With how much money I’ve spent lately I’m a bit shopped out.”

My jaw hangs open a little bit, and I chase after her as she runs through the garden. “Sam, what did you buy? Tell me you didn’t order the ship already!”

“I plead the fifth,” She calls out, somewhere ahead of me. I follow the sound of her feet, then cut across another path and pounce on her. She squeals as we go down into a flower bed. I straddle her, pinning her by the shoulders and staring down at her.

She’s gorgeous, her mouth open as she catches her breath, a spark in her eyes for the first time since before the funeral. I lean in, and whisper against her lips. “I can’t believe you. I thought we were going to _discuss_ that!”

“Are you complaining?” She sounds almost scared. I smile reassuringly at her and shake my head. “Good, because I knew it might piss you off but it just kept gnawing at my head and all this other stuff was going on and I wanted to just get the ball rolling.”

I’m not really that upset. I’ve had a week to think on it. And in all honesty, if it really does get built to my specifications, I’m really excited about the idea. “What are we naming her?”

“That’s a surprise.” She grins at me, and something tells me I’m not going to get it out of her. Not yet, anyway. “You’ll find out when we christen her.”

It takes a long time to build a ship, if you count the drafting and designing phases. Years, really. My excitement dwindles a bit. “So in two or three years, then.”

“Thirteen months.”

I sit bolt upright. “ _Thirteen months?_ ”

“Yep!” Sam props herself up, then slides her arms around me. “See, it’s mostly the interior that we need designed right? And our specialized equipment. The US Navy has this whole new fleet of research ships already designed and why spend extra money and time designing a whole new hull. As long as we can make the inside work we’re golden. And it’s big enough for the helipad to not be in the way.”

Once again I’m taken aback by the thought she’s put into this. “You should be grieving, Sam, not putting serious thought into ship design.”

She brings her hand to my cheek, stroking lightly. “Shopping therapy, it’s my thing remember?”

There’s that spark again, for the second time tonight and it makes me _ecstatic_. I’ll never rush her grieving process (and I don’t think she’d ever thought she’d grieve at all) but it’s wonderful to see her mood improving. 

“Besides,” She says, and presses her face against mine. “I kind of grieved for him a long time ago, you know what I mean? This is just me...finally losing him. I think we should start looking forward.”

There are still things behind me that I’ve yet to deal with, and most of them have my father’s face all over them. I stroke at her back, then turn my head to kiss her. Maybe Sam is ready to move forward, or maybe she’s doing everything in her power to forget, but I don’t allow myself that same luxury.


	11. To the Gardens of Babylon

_Nothing is ever lost, even that which should never be found._

The first thing I notice is the singing. It sends chills down my spine. It’s harmonious and in some language I’ve never heard before, but it makes me uneasy. Lara could maybe understand what they’re saying, but she’s not here to ask. And it’s _cold_. A stiff breeze moves through stone monuments, the air rushing away as though terrified of something. As though it’s _fleeing._ And the chanting grows louder the closer I get.

I don’t even know why, but I can’t stop myself. I have to see what’s around the corner, it draws me past pillars made with a glittering kind of stone. Dark like obsidian, with flecks of gold and silver in it. I pause to touch one, and it’s so warm but it makes my stomach lurch. There’s some faint glow. It’s not a natural light. The flicker of a torch and something that smells like burning flesh.

I think this is some kind of temple. You can’t be around Lara Croft as much as I am without gaining an eye for ancient structures. For all I know it’s an ancient orgy room or something, but I’m only telling myself that so I’m not creeped out. I mean I can tell the difference between Stone Henge and the Pyramids. 

The black walls are painted in vivid color, but I can’t make heads or tails of what it’s showing me. A ritual. The kind that taps into primal, terrifying parts of human nature. Just when I think I understand what it’s trying to say, the images shift into something else. Like how you try to remember a word. It's on the tip of your tongue, it's there, it's _right_ there but you can't grasp it and then it's lost. That's what those paintings are doing to me. This isn't right, it doesn’t feel natural and I’m not even sure it belongs there. Someone added it. Someone corrupted this place. The Force is strong here and it's the _Dark Side_.

I’m _positive_ that this temple is...well it's... There’s something _fundamentally_ wrong about it. It makes my blood run cold and even Himiko retreats to a deeper part of me.

A woman’s voice rises above the others as I step into the antechamber. She’s singing, and it’s joined by hundreds of other voices. She’s nude, standing atop an altar in front of a deep, dark pool, with many others all dressed in red and white robes singing behind her. Her skin is bronzed and marked with some kind of writing. Her hair is the color of coal. The sweat on her body is beginning to make the writing run, but her voice rises, higher and louder and faster, until the entire chamber is filled with it. Until it buzzes in my chest and Himiko screams in the back of my head and I think I'm going to throw up.

Something very large moves in the water. Black tendrils begin to inch across the ground, wrapping around the woman’s legs. An eye opens inside the pool, and it’s like staring into the deepest depths of space. Half the congregation is ripped into the water with a chorus of terrified screams.

I’m screaming too. Lightning crackles around my body as Himiko reacts with _revulsion_. It’s like she knows who this woman is. My heart starts to race as the woman lifts her hands into the air. I can feel it violently thudding in my chest, in time to a ryhthm that beats faster and faster.

Like water washing over rock, the woman’s hair turns to silvered gold, rippling behind her. There’s the sound of bone cracking and flesh ripping. Golden wings grow out of her back in fits and starts, before stretching from one end of the chamber to the other. The woman’s shoulders heave from exertion, her wings dripping with blood as her surviving followers chant in their strange language.

They continue to sing. Figures emerge from the water with skin as pale as death. Their eyes are black as the void and filled with stars. In the pool that _thing_ rumbles, and stares right through me. The woman turns, but before I can see her face awhining sound, high pitched like a jet engine, rings in my ears.

"Sam?"

Sitting up, I remember I'm actually on a plane. My stomach feels like it's flipping around in circles and every muscle is tight like I'm going to start running. Lara is looking over at me, expression worried. She presses her hand to my arm. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah." I sit up, running my hand through my hair as I try to relax. My skin feels clammy, but at least Himiko isn't making herself known. "Bad dream, I think."

"About what?" Lara's hand slips easily into my own and I shake my head.

"Don't remember. I think I was being chased by those godawful shadow people again. Are we there yet?" Just like that, it's gone. Even the feeling of being watched is gone. My heart stops racing. I should be more freaked out.

"Yes, we're landing in about twenty minutes." 

The buckle seatbelt sign is on and I groan. "Damn it, I really have to pee."  
 ****

-

Between the funeral and surprising Lara with the ship and the sheer mindfuckery of what my dad did, I think I need to focus through the lens of a camera while Lara does her thing. I’m looking forward and none of this is affecting me, but I’m probably just fooling myself. I can't even escape dreams about the evil dead, I'm just waiting to have nightmares about my dad now. It wouldn't surprise me. The Evil Dad. And he's not as cool as Bruce Campbell.

We've all converged in Baghdad. Soraya comes with both Leda and the broad captain of the _Four Winds_ , Kwesi Sika. His ebony muscles ripple under a tight shirt, so I'm sure he could snap me in two but he's really just big and cuddly and full of hugs, like Jonah. I give him a huge hug when I see him.

It's not as hot as I expected but at this time of year I guess that's normal. I want to explore the city itself. Which sounds like Lara but it's a beautiful city, so why not? We've wasted so much time and it's all my fault (or all my dad's fault but really, who's counting?). I see a familiar blonde head coming up behind Kwesi as he lets me go to chat with Leda.

"Amanda!" I wave at her, and she just gives me this look, and I swear she rolls her eyes at me. I don't know what I did to offend her but when I put my hand on her arm she narrows her eyes. I let go. "Uh. Sorry. Raya didn't say you were coming."

"I guess she didn't think it was relevant. Where's Lara?" Amanda brushes at where I'd touched her like she is dusting herself off. 

I'm not in the mood for her bullshit, so I shrug my shoulder. "Getting us some wheels. Which reminds me, I wanted to start documenting with that." I unsling my camera bag and kneel. I'd bought it in Japan after the funeral and this would be it's first real field test. It's supposed to be hella sturdy and durable. Considering the people involved with this project that’s a necessary requirement. It'll probably get shot. Or eaten by a dinosaur or something. I joked about Lara running into a T-Rex once and she got this look on her face like she actually believed that's possible. I dunno. Maybe it is.

“Has she told you where we’re going?” Amanda starts walking besides me. She really grates on my nerves sometimes. It’s like she hasn’t just treated me like something she’d stepped in. I don’t know what her deal is. Does she think I'm going to make Lara not talk to her? That's stupid. I'm not that kind of possessive and it's not like Amanda is going to make moves on my wife. Maybe it’s just a personal space issue, some people are like that. She seems to be really guarded with _everyone_.

I don’t know if we can trust her, but if Lara seems willing to I can give her a chance. I move to give her a little more space between us before answering. “Yeah. She says we’re going to find the Hanging Gardens of Babylon! This is going to be awesome!”

Amanda actually looks surprised. “Don’t tell me you’re actually interested in this stuff.”

“I’m married to a woman who’s idea of entertainment is reading ancient rune-inscribed books and reproducing a sketch of an ancient temple from memory.” I smirk at her expression. People always think I'm too flaky or stupid to keep up. So I kind of like it when I can surprise them. “She’s gotten really good at getting me into it. See, she needs someone who’s good at translating that into something the rest of the world finds exciting.” I pat my camera, then lift it up. "And that's me. So smile into the camera and get all anthropologic." 

The blonde eyes the camera, then sighs. It’s the same sort of expression Lara gave when we were in University and I was filming her. What it means is that I’ve won. “Here we have soon to be world-famous anthropologist Amanda Evert as we prepare to seek out one of the ancient wonders of the Ancient world. The Hanging Gardens of Babylon. Amanda, why don’t you give our viewers a brief rundown on the gardens?”

She looks at the camera for a moment, then nods her head. “Scholars still argue as to whether or not they ever existed, but most accounts have them as being built in or near Babylon, around twenty-five hundred years ago. They were built either in the palace or in a park nearby, and most accounts describe them as being above ground, on high walks or terraces and supported by stone pillars."

“What do you expect we’ll find?”

Amanda seems to open up the more she talks, warming to the subject and hopefully me. But I'm totally an expert at bonding with deeply closeted smart girls. As if I haven't noticed. “There’s likely little left but buried rubble. The gardens themselves of course don’t exist. But there was an ancient text Leda discovered while you and Lara were tending to family matters, and Lara and I discussed that over the phone before my flight.”

We’ve reached the vehicle that Lara’s secured, and I pan the camera over to her. She’s leaning against a jeep and wearing sturdy boots and cargo pants with straps around her thighs and just above her knees. She has on a light blue tank top with a bomber jacket over it. She looks ridiculously hot and I’m not the only one staring at her. Amanda has stopped talking and her mouth is hanging open just a smidge. Yep. Knew it.

Lara clears her throat and continues for Amanda. “What our friends discovered is that the location of the Hanging Gardens may have been further away from ancient Babylon than anyone ever thought. So we’re going back out into a desert.”

“Totally my absolute favorite climate type,” I say, before lowering the camera. “Are we all going to fit in there?”

“It'll be a tight fit, but we can manage."

I grin at her, and open my mouth because Lara just walked right into it and I have _the perfect retort_ , but someone clamps a hand over my face. Soraya smells like cigarettes. “Yes, I am sure we can manage the tight fit without the jokes.”

She lets go of me and I punch her in the shoulder. Leda appears from behind her, all smiles and curls, and nearly crushes me in her own hug. I half expect Jonah to come out of nowhere to finish me off.

The jeep is roomier inside than it looks, but with all the weapons and gear Lara’s packed, Kwesi gets squeezed into the passenger side of the back seat, with Leda next to him and Raya smushed on her other side. I glance at Amanda and she looks at me, then we’re both racing for the passenger seat. I used to have to run between classes in heels. I'm in boots so this is cake. I get to the door first, diving through the window and planting my very fine ass in the seat.

The blonde woman huffs, folding her arms and looking in the back seat, then in the front seat. I shrug at her. “So who’s lap do you want? I mean, you can’t really go wrong. Everyone in this jeep is hot.”

“I’ll just sit on the roof.”

Lara lets out this exasperated sigh, gets out of the jeep and comes around to Amanda. She opens the door, _picks Amanda up_ and drops her into my lap. Then she closes the door. “At least the air conditioning on this one works.”

If looks could kill, Amanda would have lasers boring into Lara’s head as she gets back in. “You couldn’t rent two?”

“That was the plan, originally." She smiles cheekily. "This was the last one.”  
 ****

-

I don’t even want to know how long this trip is going to be. I’ve got a crotchety young American girl in my lap. She’s so tense, and it’s hard to move around so I can talk to the others in the back, but I manage it without dislodging her too much. My hand rests on the small of her back and she even seems to relax after a little bit of rubbing. I catch, for just the briefest second, this utterly _depressed_ look on her face. It’s gone before I can blink.

“So I’m hearing that you’ve trapped the ever elusive mercenary in your web.” Kwesi’s voice breaks the silence, and I shift a little more to look at him. He’s glancing at Leda with a wolfish grin. 

The plump woman grins back with just as much teeth. “Yes, it’s official.”

“What’s official?” Lara looks into the mirror as Leda holds up her hand. She has the biggest diamond I've ever seen on her finger and I literally gasp. And maybe squeal a little, much to Amanda's distress. 

"That's gorgeous! Soraya you better treat her right."

"I will. She is the best thing that's ever happened to me." 

I’m way too excited to stop the word spew. "So when's the wedding? Are we invited, tell me we're invited. Are you thinking about settling down? No more adventures? Kids?"

As soon as the last word is out of my mouth, it looks like Leda stiffens up. I fucked up, I know I fucked up, but I'm not sure how I fucked up. In fact, I'm pretty sure I was seeing things. "Uhm."

Soraya puts her hand on Leda's arm. "Of course you are invited. We haven't decided on a date yet."

"She's settling down." There's a firmness in Leda's voice that makes me raise my eyebrows. Probably something they've fought about. I glance at Lara, certain that that's a fight we're going to have some day. My wife is careful to not meet my eyes. Mmhm.

"That's good!" Kwesi rests his hand on Leda's shoulder. He just looks so utterly happy for them. I remember how we'd celebrated on the _Four Winds_. Either he really likes lesbians, or he's just a big softy. "That's good. There is so much suffering in this world, that happiness is something you must _grasp_ on as tightly as you can."

Amanda moves on my lap, squirming in a way that's frankly distracting. I suddenly feel guilty for yelling at Lara about Giovanna. The jeep bumps on the road, jostling us as Lara turns off into the desert proper.

"I want one," Leda says. She's looking down at her hands, picking at the skin around her nails. "Soraya's getting too old to carry, and I can't, so we're going to adopt."

"Why can't you?" Once again I speak before I think. Amanda elbows me in one breast.

Leda sighs and looks at me pointedly. "Because my body didn’t always reflect who I really am."

There's a sudden, heavy pause in the air. Lara's staring straight ahead, Amanda is glancing off to the side. Everyone's trying to process her statement. The only outward sign from Soraya is that her grip on Leda’s arm has tightened.

Kwesi puts his arm around her and squeezes. "You will be wonderful mothers to a deserving child."

I start breathing again, and add, "Damn right!" Meanwhile, I’ll be kicking myself the rest of the trip. That’s me. Sam the inconsiderate ass.

"I call dibs on favorite auntie," Lara says. 

"And for the record, there still isn't a person in this jeep I wouldn't tap." I wink at Leda.

Amanda groans and covers her face, Lara sighs my name, but Leda smiles back at me, and I'm a little relieved.

The merc pulls Leda against her possessively, giving me a mock death glare. It’s all good though. I see it in her eyes, what Leda means to her. I’d worried before that Raya might break her heart. But Leda clearly means everything to her.  
 ****

-

We run out of safe driving space two hours later. Lara parks the jeep against a boulder. Amanda nearly falls out of the jeep trying to get out, and I steady her.

No one says anything. It’s really quiet, just the sound of the wind greeting us. Soraya moves first, opening the back of the jeep and unloading weapons. 

Lara has her case. I caught her putting it together months ago for carrying her weapons. I hadn’t said anything then. I wish I had. She straps a quiver to her back. She wears a bow around her chest, and Roth’s pistols at her thighs. She also has a shotgun. She looks ready for anything.

Soraya is looking over an automatic rifle when I approach her. She reaches into a crate and pulls out a weapon. It’s an MP5, and I chew on my lip as I inspect it, then hang it off of my shoulder. I really don’t like the weight, but I’m not going to hand it back now. I nod at Soraya and she gives me a long, considering look before nodding back. Leda slips past me to pick up a pair of uzis.

I film everyone getting ready. Amanda helps Kwesi into a pack with most of our supplies, then picks up another MP5. The big man only carries a pistol, but I’m pretty sure we’re okay on weapons.

We march into the desert like some kind of armed patrol. We’re knee deep in a recovering warzone and armed to the teeth. Was this Soraya’s idea, or Lara’s? Raya’s done this thing a lot longer than Lara has, and has the stories and scars to prove it. She and Lara take point, and I drop back behind Amanda and Leda to film them. “Do we even know where we’re going?”

Leda falls back a little, gesturing for me to point the camera at some maps in her hands. “There was something strange about the satellite images when I was looking over them. You can’t get very good pictures off the civilian systems, but I have my ways. If you look here.” She points at a spot on the map. Even while holding it she moves her free hand while she talks. She’s not the kind of woman who can stand still. “It’s like something is interfering. I compared it to images taken of Peru, Turkey and Egypt, and the area where Yamatai is, all from before you and Lara ever visited them. They show the same kind of signature. That signature is gone now.”

I’ll admit, I hadn’t expected Leda to be some kind of computer genius. I wonder how she and Soraya had met, and how long they’ve known each other. I have a lot of questions, honestly, but this isn’t the time to ask them and she may not want to talk about it. “Let me guess, it looks like that at our house now.”

“Yes.” 

“Great!”  
 ****

-

I get this feeling in the pit of my stomach that gets worse the closer we get to the spot on Leda’s map. Every fiber of my body wants to turn around and run in the opposite direction. I can’t explain it, and it feels vaguely familiar. But when we reach a canyon, the view takes my breath away.

It’s the Hanging Gardens. Terraces rise up sheer cliffs, each filled with a dazzling array of plants. Flowers and trees, bushes and grass, in every color imaginable. There’s an entire orchid on one stone platform, and as Amanda said, there are many pillars holding the garden up. The shocking thing is that some of the plants don’t belong. There are trees from the Americas, and what looks like cherry blossom trees.

No one says anything, I think we’re all still gaping and I look away long enough to make sure I didn’t forget to turn my camera on. No one is going to believe this, no one. There’s a massive garden in the middle of the desert, far away from the nearest river _and no one has found it before_. Or at least, no one has found it and lived to say. I feel the weight of my gun and it’s suffocating.

A chill runs down my spine. Amanda starts to rub her arms, looking up at the garden. “Anyone else get the feeling we’re being watched?”

“We’re not alone,” Lara says, unslinging her bow. She sounds wistful and a little regretful. “Sam, record _everything_. I don’t think I’m going to get to enjoy this as much as I’d like.”

“Already on it.” I return my focus to looking through my lens, scanning everywhere, trying to take it all in. I get a fantastic shot of the sun over the gardens and hold that for several moments, while everyone spreads out to explore. 

Something lands nearby, I look over to see a silver canister in the sand. Before I can shout, before I can look away, I’m blinded by a flash of light as a concussive blast knocks me back into a pillar. My ears ring and my head is spinning. There’s some kind of dull tapping sound, repeating rapidly, over and over and over. I realize it’s not a sound, but the vibrations from gunfire.

Big, beefy hands grab onto me and I’m lifted bodily up. “Lara!? LARA! _LARA! _”__

__My vision is nothing but blacks and white spots, and the only thing I can hear is that dull, distant gunfire. I beat my camera against my kidnapper and he drops me. I try to crawl away in the sand, but hands pull me back and someone puts all their weight onto my body._ _

__Whoever they are pins my arms at my side, and I freeze. We’re frozen like that, the gunfire starting to sound less distant. I’d recognize the body pressed against me anywhere, and I finally catch Lara shouting my name right next to my ear._ _

__Oh my god, oh thank god. But I’m still shaking, I can’t see. I can’t _see_!! “Lara, I can’t _see_!”_ _


	12. And the Sun Sets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have an extra-long chapter as apology for the long wait. I'm writing the rest of the fic for NaNo and I'm in the process of editing it. It will update more regularly once that's complete. Enjoy!

In her blind panic, Sam smacks me a few times in the face before I’m able to get her pinned down. The flashbang must have blinded her, and she doesn’t respond to my voice for several terrifying seconds. The markings on her arms and face are glowing brightly and I feel this terror in my gut. We _can’t_ handle Himiko right now on top of everything else!

“Lara, I can’t see!” The panic in her voice is like a knife in my heart. More than the people shooting at us, more than the power dwelling inside of her, I think Sam is scared of losing her ability to film. It’s not just her livelihood, it’s also the one thing that gives her purpose. I think she feels like it’s the only thing she’s good at.

“Sam!” I pull her into cover. We’re under fire and keeping her safe is my immediate priority. The retorts of Soraya’s gun ring in my right ear. The sound is deep, reverbing in my chest and making my teeth rattle. She’s propped the thing on a fallen pillar, but can only pull the trigger a few seconds at a time before our attackers rain bullets on our position. I turn my attention to Sam, inspecting her eyes. Flashbangs rarely cause permanent damage to adults, but it had gone off pretty closely to her and her face is reddened. Luckily, Sam’s eyes start to focus on my face. “Just sit still, your vision should return quickly. But sit still until we need to move, can you understand?”

“Yeah….yeah I think. Oh my god.” She touches my face, but she looks calmer now. Hoping she can see it, I give her a reassuring smile. Sam smiles back.

I crawl over to the mercenary and take stock of the situation. The enemy has the high ground. Kwesi is on the other side of Sam. He’d been the one to grab her in the initial confusion and I owe that man a drink when this is all over. He tucks her near him and gives me a thumbs up. One less thing to worry about, at least.

Amanda is further away, hidden behind some pillars. She can’t be seen by the shooters from where she is, but there’s no way for her to reach us without being spotted and shot. I signal for her to stay put. 

Leda is farther to the left having taken cover beneath a terrace covered by fruited trees. We’re separated, and I don’t even know how many people we’re fighting against. “Raya, can you fire a burst while I try to get a count of them?”

She smirks. There’s a fire in her eyes and I’m reminded that this is what she does for a living. “Ready when you are.”

I signal her and she opens fire. I poke my head out of the safety of our cover. Two men to the northeast on a platform covered in yellow flowers. Another a hundred meters west of them trying to hide in amongst ferns. I see movement below them as well. Six men, possibly seven, in three positions. “Six or seven.” I draw our positions in the sand. X for the enemy, and circles for us.

The wheels are turning in her head. I want to get Amanda and Leda here with us. We can’t escape without them, but any attempt they make out of cover will surely kill them. She worries at her lip. “The closest is what, two-hundred meters?”

“At least.”

“Wish we had a rifle. They would be easy pickings.” She hunkers down further as several bullets chip away at our stone barrier. A shard cuts her cheek.

I unsling my bow. “We don’t need one. If you can get me a little closer I can hit them.”

She stares at me, then at my bow and laughs. “If you can hit one of them at that range I’ll give you a hundred pounds.”

I regularly practice range shooting. Yamatai taught me that the best way to survive is to eliminate the enemy before they can have a chance to hit you. I grin at her and shake her hand. “Challenge accepted.” 

There’s something grim about making a wager over _killing_ people, but I don’t let it phase me. Soraya just nods, and hefts her weapon. “I’ll give you cover. We need to end this.”

“They’ll target me as I move anyway, but maybe Leda can make her way down here while they’re doing that. Focus on covering her if you need to make a choice.”

On the count of three, Raya sprays the enemy and I start to run for Amanda’s position. Three shots for every step I take. I don’t know how much ammo she has, but we can’t sustain this forever. I tunnelvision to Amanda and dive into cover, dirt exploding behind me as bullets track a mere meter behind me.

“You’re fucking _stupid_!”

I look up at Amanda’s disbelieving face. “Glad to see you’re okay too.” She doesn’t seem hurt. Inching past her, I get my bearings. Two of the men are at roughly one-sixty meters now. Leda has found new cover closer to the others and Sam has recovered enough to resume filming. I glance at the blonde. “Amanda, I’m going to need your help.”

She gives me a skeptical look, but seems willing to listen. “Okay. I’m listening.”

The plan is simple. I need time to aim. I need time to calculate the distance, the drop-off and the wind. I need my targets to not notice what I’m doing until it’s much too late. Amanda will fire on them while I use cover from a nearby terrace. I have to trust her. I don’t have a choice. I expect some kind of comment on being used as bait, but if she’s thinking it, she doesn’t say it. Perhaps she’s saving it for later. If there’s a later. I’ll happily let her tear into me if there’s a later.

I signal Amanda and she leans out of cover, opening with her submachinegun. My targets focus on her, but as soon as they do, Leda and Soraya are shooting too. Kwesi hasn’t shot a bullet yet, but he’s focusing more on keeping an eye out for someone trying to flank us. Armed with only a pistol, that’s the most effective thing he can be doing right now. He never struck me as the kind of man prone to violence, anyway.

With the girls alternating on their shooting, I take aim. Some of their shots come pretty close but I can’t focus on that. I sight down one man, and shut down every distraction. The gunfire becomes distant and dull, like it’s far away. The wind moves my hair and I adjust my angle to compensate. I draw and loose the arrow.

The man twists in the air as the arrow buries itself in his neck and then he’s falling off the terrace. I’ve already got my next arrow knocked when his compatriot notices me, but it’s too late for him. I strike him in the shoulder. He staggers, and a spray of bullets from Soraya’s assault rifle rip through him and finish him off.

No longer in the line of sight of any of them, I start to make my way closer to the enemy position. Amanda takes a chance on the lull in gunfire to retreat to the others. They’re all relatively safe for the time being, but there are still at least four more attackers to deal with. I’m closest and in a way that’s exactly how I want it to be. They’ve attacked my friends. They’ve disturbed this ancient place. If they want blood, by god I’ll show them blood.

I need to get to higher ground. It’s not that easy. The Hanging Garden is terraces and steps and I can’t begin to fathom how all these plants survive in this climate, undiscovered for centuries. For all it’s beauty, I’m uneasy. It’s as though it’s hiding something dark, something unnatural. The closer I get to those men, the stronger that feeling is. They _must_ have an artifact!

I find three of the men gathered together, hidden beneath cherry blossoms. It’s not even the right time of year for them to be in bloom, but every plant here seems to be flowering or fruiting. The scientist in me wants to know why. The artifact, perhaps? I push that aside. We’ll have time to _really_ explore once we’ve eliminated the threat. Even from here I can see runes and markings on most of the terraces and platforms. Do they describe the plants? Like a plaque at the museum or at a garden. Or do they tell how they mysteriously stay alive? 

My first arrow strikes a tall, portly man in the face. Before the other two can react, I’ve knocked another. The second man tumbles off the edge from the impact and I duck into the foilage of my platform as the third makes my position. 

It’s covered in thick ferns and is much more humid than some of the other platforms. I feel like I’m in the jungle, on the hunt. My skin sticks to my body, becoming slick from sweat and the humidity. Leaves rustle to my left. He’s not very good at moving quietly. I choose my steps carefully, always keeping something solid to my back and trying to avoid anything that might make a sound. The terrace is about two hundred square meters in size, which isn’t really that large in the grand scheme of things. But it feels larger. The ferns and leaves are dense enough that I can forget there’s a desert outside of this canyon, or that this garden is so impossible. There’s only the ferns and my prey.

I throw a stone, and a moment later the man fires his gun in the direction it had landed. I throw another, shaking some leaves to his right and he twirls, shooting wildly. There’s fear on his face and a mad grin crosses my own. Be afraid of me. You can’t see me, but I can see you. Just a little closer. Just come a _little_ closer.

The moment he steps into range, I strike like a snake. I grab him in a choke hold, my axe locked into his neck and my foot twisting underneath his ankle. His own weight mangles his neck open as he falls, and I unhook the axe and move on. I break into a run and leap to the next terrace, continuing that way from one terrace to another until I’ve reached the far end of the canyon. 

The plants here seem to be the oldest. I recognize the stalks of one as Silphium, an ancient plant thought to be extinct. The Romans valued it as highly as silver. I don’t know what possesses me, but I cut one down and stuff it into my pack. With the seeds, maybe we can bring this species back. If we have to make a quick escape, at least we can leave with something.

Some of the other plants here are also extinct, I’m certain. I’m no botanist, but they _have_ to be _valuable_. With a find like this, bringing in the right kind of experts as soon as possible is crucial. We’ll want to work in tangent with plant experts while exploring the garden. But first, the competition. By my count there are two more men, with possible third lurking about. I’ll have to keep him in mind while I deal with these last two. Better than being caught off guard. 

This last platform leads into the cliffside. The builders of the gardens had carved out what appears to be elaborate tunnels and rooms, lit by open shafts into the gardens. Besides the elegant script and carved pictures, there are the now familiar warning markers. The contorted faces. They aren’t laughing here like they have in other places. Here, they are in agony, and my head starts to pound the deeper I go. There are some other symbols, interlocking or segmented circles, but before I can get a good look at them the ground rumbles suddenly.

Seconds later I’m nearly buried under a pile of rubble and sand. The entire complex starts to to collapse around me. The ground shakes and twists and opens up beneath my feet and I leap towards the entrance, running as fast as I can. The stone tunnels are falling apart behind me, the floor giving way under me and the only thing I can do is run _faster_. A gust of wind surges up behind me and I’m flung out of the tunnels. 

When I come to, there are voices nearby. I try to grab my axe or a gun, but I’ve been disarmed. My concern only ceases when I recognize the voices. I push myself up, blinking the sun out of my eyes as a silhouette leans over me. “Sam?”

“Oh thank god.” My wife helps me up, then kisses me soundly and wraps her arms around me. I rest my chin in her hair a moment, then look around. I barely have time to try to understand what happened before Amanda grabs me by the shoulder and spins me around.

“What happened?!”

The Gardens lay in ruin. The plants have all withered and died, many falling apart before my very eyes. Dizzy, I lean on Sam as the sheer magnitude crashes onto me. “… I chased them into tunnels in the canyon. There was...an explosion, or something. Everything started to collapse. Oh god, it’s all _gone_.”

Amanda kneels, picking up the desiccated remains of a fern. Her voice wavers as she speaks. “Some of these plants have been extinct for millennia. Some of them were plants the ancients ate as part of their daily diet. We could have learned _so_ much. There are people I know who could have spent their whole lives unlocking the secrets here. Just a few hours ago I never imagined it could still be here, that it was real and now…”

Kwesi’s big hand pats lightly against Amanda’s back and she leans against him. Soraya is digging through some of the dying plants. Plucking at seeds and acorns, I think, trying to save something… _anything_. It’s not our field but this loss still hurts. There was so much in those tunnels, I could have explored for hours if given half a chance.

“I got as much as I could,” Sam says, holding up her camera. “During the fighting.”

“Good work, Sam,” I whisper.

“What?”

“Good work,” I repeat, a little louder. 

What Soraya is doing reminds me and I unsling my pack. The stalk is dead, but triumphantly I pull out some of the heart-shaped seeds. I hold one up. “Silphium!”

I hand it over to Amanda. There’s something haunting her eyes. Regret, I think. “I’ve got more but maybe it’s best if we each carry some. Just in case.”

When I step away to give some seeds to Kwesi and Leda, Sam hugs Amanda. I half expect the blonde to lash out like a wounded animal, but she doesn’t. She even hugs back. Awkwardly, but she does. She steps back, taking Sam’s arm and inspecting it. Sam’s markings are fading. Still there, but dull and no longer glowing. She and Sam exchange a few words, but I already know what it means. The artifact is gone.

The trek away from the Hanging Gardens is long, depressing and mostly silent. I turn to look back into the canyon. The terraces have mostly collapsed, the platforms are gone, and all those beautiful plants have withered away to dust. I barely got to get a look at the frescos and designs. I’d had only hurried glimpses of the tunnel system. God only knew what treasures and knowledge have just been lost today, but I’m too exhausted to cry over it. It’s another defeat and I don’t know how many more I can take. I watch the sun set over the ruins of the Hanging Gardens of Babylon.

I buy everyone a first class ticket back to London. I don’t care about the cost right now. I spend most of the flight sketching out what I remembered of the gardens. The others offer their insights as well and Sam’s camera work will help fill in the details later, but after several hours of flight we’re all a little tired of the subject. Sam swaps seats with Soraya and starts chatting Leda up about adoption and children. I’m sure her motivations are to simply cheer everyone up, but I can’t help but think of that girl back in Tibet. When we land I’m going to check up on Dolma. Maybe it would be best to bring her to England, but right now it’s probable that she’s _safer_ where she is.

I glance up and catch Sam mimicing having a pregnant belly. It’s an adorable mental image. Amanda elbows me and I realize I had a dumb smile on my face. “What?”

“Nothing.” She pushes some hair off of her face. “You two are… kind of. Cavity inducing. Not what I expected. It’s nothing.” It doesn’t seem like nothing, but she doesn’t seem inclined to pursue the subject. Her tone had been almost wistful. “So what’s next? It feels like we’ve lost our last lead.”

“Our lead?” I say, raising my eyebrow and giving her a faux surprised look. “You’ve just kind of wormed your way in, haven’t you.”

“You don’t sound like you mind.”

“No, I don’t. It’s nice to have someone to talk shop with. Sam pays attention, but it’s hard to get into the real intricate details with her unless it’s about film work. And Soraya is a little more practical about this sort of thing.” It’s nice to have someone who understands the lingo and the dialect and what it means to really dig in the _dirt_. More the science side, and less the adventure shooting side.

Amanda smiles ruefully. “I’ll admit I haven’t had many friends who could walk the walk. I thought you might have been all talk at first, but … you can walk the walk. Everyone keeps surprising me.”

“Even my wife?”

“Even her.”

“I guess that makes us officially friends then.”

She laughs, and gestures around at everyone. “So what do we call ourselves, then? I’m _not_ calling it Team Croft.”

Come to think of it, I don’t know what my father called his expedition team. We were the Endurance crew on Yamatai, and it was mostly just Sam, Soraya and myself for much of these artifacts. But now we have a real crew. With a real ship in a year, but Sam still hasn’t told me what it will be called. Apparently a helicopter too from what she was saying.

“I don’t really know yet. I suppose we should have some kind of actual organization. It will be easier to figure out how to pay everyone, too.”

Amanda looks genuinely taken aback. “I’m getting paid?”

“Soraya keeps trying to work for free but I’m not going to let her get away with it. The same goes for you and Kwesi too, and Leda. You’re putting your necks on the line every bit as much as I am!” I look down at my sketches of the Hanging Gardens and brush my fingers cross the paper. They could have died there. They almost did and then we lost all that history. I’m still angry, but it’s hard to maintain right now.

“Tomb Raiders?”

I laugh. “You know, Sam once suggested that. But honestly, the only people doing any tomb raiding are Shaw’s people.”

The blonde shrugs, and rests her hand on my arm. “It sounds kind of stupid, honestly.”

I briefly wonder if she’s flirting with me. But she’s with Jonah, and Sam will kill her if she tries anything. “You’re probably right.” 

The manor is about as we left it. Reyes and Alisha are still there, and it’s Jonah that greets us all, enveloping Sam, Amanda and I in a single gigantic hug. Winston already has dinner ready, and we convene around the dining table. Kwesi fills them in on what happened in Iraq, though he embellishes everyone’s parts until it seems like we’re all super humans dealing with some kind of skull-chasing, mustache-twirling villain. I let him. The way Alisha hangs on his every word is cute, and I’m really too tired to debate the finer points of the story.

I think Winston catches on pretty quickly, because we’re not even half way through before he’s shooing us to bed. Sam stifles a giggle, and elbows me and turns my head so that I catch Amanda pulling Jonah off. Just the thought makes me tired. “How does she have the _energy_?”

Sam slides her arm around my waist. “You know. I was worried about him maybe breaking her in half but now I think it’s the other way around.”

The others peel off as well, until it’s just Sam and I leaning on each other as we trudge upstairs. We’re barely over the threshold of our room before Sam’s fingers start playing with my waistband. I don’t know whether to laugh or groan, so I do both. “You can’t _possibly_ be in the mood right now.”

“You were so fucking hot today,” she says, tugging my belt out of the loops in one impressively smooth motion. 

“Yesterday at this point, I think.” I wasn’t of a mind to stop her before, but after what she just did to my belt, I’ve discovered a new reserve of energy. 

“Shh.” She starts pushing me towards the bed. When she gets like this it’s rather… well it’s _hot_.

“I thought you liked it when I got loud, Sam.”

She fixes me with a look, then pushes her finger into my forehead until I get the idea and fall backwards onto the bed. “Just let me do _all_ the work tonight, sweetie.”

The bed is so comfortable that I just hope I don’t fall asleep. I do, eventually, but not before Sam makes me positively embarrassed about myself. 

I don’t sleep the night through. It’s the wee hours of the morning when I drag myself out of bed. I feel suddenly wired, and spend twenty minutes checking all the locks on the entrances, before wandering into my study. The door to the relic room is ajar, and I tense. Drawing a sword from a display on the wall, I creep towards the door. Crouching, I strain my ears. There’s movement inside. The quiet sound is suddenly overwhelmed by a deep thrumming. A wave of energy blows the door all the way open and the heavy metal nearly crushes me.

Rushing inside and brandishing my sword, I’m greeted by the site of Alisha holding the statue of Mehit. “Alisha...put the relic down.”

To my relief, she does. I step closer, taking her arm and pulling her out of the room. I seal the door again. “How did you get in there?”

When she looks at me, her eyes are almost cat like, and they glow an eerie yellow. My stomach sinks. “Alisha, honey. It’s Lara. I need you to focus on the sound of my voice. I need to know that you’re in there. Talk to me.”

She does, but it’s in a language as ancient as the sand. I only catch a few words that I can understand. Then she runs, and it’s a blur but I swear she takes on the shape of a lioness. “Reyes is going to kill me.”

Tossing aside the sword, I run after her. It’s a merry chase she gives me, up the stairs and back down again. We’re making a racket and the cost of broken pottery is going to be painful, but at last I’m able to catch her, and pin her down. She tries to change shape again, and manages to gouge claws in my shoulder, but I don’t let go.

Footsteps approach, and I pray it’s not Reyes yet. I need a chance to talk to her, once I get Alisha subdued and secure. I lift my head, expecting Sam or hopefully Jonah. It’s a man in black clothing, but that’s all I see before he slams something hard into my head.

The world spins out and my vision dims as my head rings. I’m out for… I don’t know how long. I lift my head to see chaos. There’s a body in black clothing next to me, and Leda is standing over it holding a shotgun. Blood splatters her nightgown and her face, but she looks otherwise all right.

I take her proffered hand and let her pull me up. The hallway is a mess. Two more bodies lie at the end of the hall. Reyes steps over one, her fists bloodied. I turn back to Leda. “Where are the others? Alisha? Sam?”

“Soraya’s out cold downstairs. Kwesi has been shot but Winston says it isn’t serious. Amanda is down too, someone hit her from behind. Kind of like you were.”

“What about-?” Reyes decks me, shouting something about this all being my fault. She’s not entirely wrong. My face bounces off the hardwood floor and I see _red_. I twist my body, kicking my legs between Reyes and knock her to the floor too. In a second I’m on her and the only thing that stops me from beating her teeth in is Leda grabbing my arms. She hauls me off of the other woman.

“Stop that, both of you! They’re _gone_! They took Sam and Alisha.” I strain against the Greek woman before going limp as her words sink in. 

“I’m sorry, they’re gone.”


	13. Taking Control

It’s a really long day. I mean, first there’s the nearly going blind thing, then we spend like an hour fighting off these douchebags. I get some _great_ shots of everyone in action, but my ears keep ringing off and on and it’s distracting and scary. But I can see and … I really can’t describe how fucking scared I was. I mean, my eyes are my everything. I can’t work a camera without them. And that’s the one thing I’ve ever been good at. That’s my _thing_. Without that, I’m just dead weight, and god only knows how long Lara would stay around after that. Which isn’t fair. But it would really suck to sit there at home in a dark world knowing Lara is out doing something adventurous. And being worried sick about her.

And then while we’re regrouping, the whole damn canyon starts coming down. All those beautiful plants just turn to dust, all the terraces crash and break. It really breaks my heart. I’m not a super envirogroupie or anything, but I can totally get where the others are coming from. This Ancient Wonder is gone in like three minutes, five tops. I think Amanda makes a sound only dogs can hear. Just from the expression on her face this hits her harder than the rest of us. But yeah, I totally get that. She didn’t think we’d even _see_ anything here, but now that we have it’s gone. And isn’t part of her field something about what people ate and stuff? Goldmine. And it just blew up.

Kwesi and Raya had dig Lara out of the wreckage. My markings had flared while the place had come tumbling down, but then they were dull and lifeless again. Amanda had said that she thought that meant the artifact was gone, but her hands were oddly warm. She didn’t need to say anything anyway. Himiko had settled down and that’s like the best way to know if things were back to normal. That bitch always stirs when there’s trouble. She’d gotten real loud like two seconds before everything went ass up.

I guess whatever magic protected the artifact must have also kept the Gardens alive. So whoever broke the seal killed the gardens in the process. It makes me so _angry_ that it nearly wakes Himiko up again, but I don’t tell anyone. No one needs to know that. But damn, I just know we would have been able to get it without harming anything. I have this gut feeling.

I just want to go home. Find something positive to take out of this. The flight takes forever and Amanda spends a lot of time talking to Lara, but when we get home we have this sort of family dinner. The food and getting a chance to wind down kind of reinvigorates me. It must have done the same to Lara too, because she was totally into it when I couldn’t keep my hands off of her.

I’m alone when I wake up. There’s the sound of crashing out in the hall, joined by gun fire. I roll towards the nightstand, opening it to pull out a pistol but someone grabs me from behind. I smell something that’s kind of sweet and kind of antiseptic before I pass out.

I can’t remember my dream. I think I’m back in that place, the one with the chanting and the scary winged lady, only it’s much more beautiful. It’s a city with gleaming spires made of metal and glass. Golds and silvers and all the colors of the rainbow glittering around me. I hear marching, like there’s a parade and I catch a glimpse of a banner with a symbol on it.

But before I could really get a good look at it, I’m awake again. The first thing I notice is how cold it is. There’s wind howling outside and the room that I’m in is pretty much full of holes. Someone had put me in a basic white jumpsuit and I shiver from something that’s not just the wind. I hate that part more than the actual getting kidnapped part.

The second thing I notice is a still form next to one wall. I crawl over and turn her over. It’s Alisha! She’s breathing and shivering, so I pull her close, rubbing her arms to try to warm her up.

Alisha opens her eyes. They glow yellow briefly, and the monster inside of me stirs in familiarity. But the sensation passes. “..Sam? What’s going on?”

“We got damseled,” I tell her, letting her move so that she’s sitting next to me. I don’t have a jacket to put around her so I just hug her with my arm. “Lara and your mom are going to burn down half of Europe trying to find us.”

“I’m not sure Europe deserves that.”

“Some parts do.” Putting my arm around her, I squeeze. “Okay kiddo. I am _so_ tired of being held at the whim of gods and men. We’re gonna bust out.”

“How?” 

I glance at her, remembering the glow, and the stirring of Himiko. “Do you feel a little...different? Like there’s something inside of you napping and it just kind of wants to wake up?”

“Something made me pick up that statue. The one you brought back from Thinis.” She looks so guilty that I can’t be mad at her. The power is toxic and these things like to try to control you.

“That’s not your fault. Sometimes these things are out of your control. But I think...whatever was inside that statue is inside of you now.”

“That was supposed to be some kind of goddess, wasn’t it?” She looks up at me, fear in her eyes.

“Yeah, I think. Maybit or something. Mehit. She’s not a super-famous one, I think she got less popular later on.”

“She’s patient. Like she’s been waiting a long time. And she’s not happy about being forgotten.”

“Lucky you. I wish you know who was as patient. She’s always...there.”

Alisha’s head suddenly turns towards the door, and a moment later I hear the foot steps myself. Huh. Cats. That part wouldn’t be so bad.

It swings open, and low and behold there’s the big man himself. Shaw. I start to stand. Energy rushes through me and my hair starts to stand on end but then I realize we’re surrounded by metal. Sure, I’d be okay probably but if I fry Shaw I’ll probably fry Alisha too. Fuck.

The old bastard smirks at me as I sit back down. “Realized that metal is conductive, did you?”

“Fuck off!” Alisha snarls. She’s like sixteen, she shouldn’t be using those words but Shaw deserves it. Besides, I was sixteen once and about as foul mouthed.

“You have a choice. You can come along peacefully, or we can make this difficult.” 

I want to wipe the smug smile off of his pasty face, but I put a hand on Alisha’s shoulder hoping to keep the lioness inside her at bay. “Fine, we’ll play along for now.” Maybe we can find a way to escape. Hopefully before Mehit decides she wants to be in control. I can feel the girl tensing and untensing. Oh man, Reyes is gonna _kill_ me and Lara!

They don’t take any chances. Between us and Shaw are two heavily armed men. Behind us is a woman and another man, also heavily armed. We’re led outside. It’s raining and stormy, and we’re on some kind of oil rig. Water lashes angrily at the platform. Himiko stirs again and it’s like she feels at home. I can’t see the shore, but with the storm I can’t really see anything at all. I glance up at the clouds. Maybe there’s one thing I can do. Just work with me, Himiko!

We’re led across the platform and up into some kind of tower. The tower is clearly new, though I’ll give them some credit in that they did a decent job of welding it to the rig. It doesn’t look as precarious or scary as it could have been. I’ll also give them credit for ripping the interior straight out of Frankenstien. There are electronics and diodes and one of those tables that you get strapped to just before they do horrible experiments to your body. My blood freezes. Whatever else happens, I _have_ to protect Alisha. Being in this position is a little new to me.

 

There are wires running from the table to another table. On that table rests a sword. It looks ancient. I don’t know how I know it, but it’s from Yamatai. Okay so how I know it is kind of obvious, I just don’t want to think about that. “Well if you wanted to commit seppuku, I’d be happy to officiate. I think we have enough people for an audience.” 

“Come now, Mrs. Croft.” He gestures towards the sword. He looks and sounds like some cross between a friendly grandpa and the president guy from the Hunger Games. He’s just so creepy. “I would have thought you’d want to be free of this curse you’ve found yourself consumed by. This is your chance. We are going to siphon the Sun Queen into a more … _suitable_ vessel.”

“Thanks, I’ve always wanted to be found unsuitable. It’s been a dream of mine ever since I was a little girl.” 

He looks at me like he can’t tell if I’m being sarcastic or not. Hands grab my arms and drag me over to the table. They manhandle me down. So I’m just a little crazy because I just _have_ to taunt them. “You know you’re all gonna be dead tomorrow, right? You pissed off a mama bear and a wolf and they’re going to rip your throats out and spit down your necks.”

Alisha wrinkles her nose. “Gross.”

"You should hear what I was actually thinking instead."

"No thanks."

Shaw’s face is growing redder and I don’t think he appreciates our banter and that’s probably stupid on my part. Considering I know what they did to Lara. It had taken a lot of coaxing, but she had eventually shared everything that had happened in his research facility. 

So I know what this waste of human flesh is actually capable of. Maybe he doesn't have the stomach to do anything himself, but he's willing to hurt people to get what he wants. It's pathetic, and scary. I'm not afraid to admit I'm terrified, but I have to hold it together for Alisha. Sure her parents are Reyes and Roth and she's holding up way better than I would have when I was sixteen but she's still just a girl, and she doesn't deserve any of this. So whatever happens, I have to girl the hell up and take it for her.

I just hope Himiko can work with me.

Shaw’s henchwoman throws a switch. The pain is _immediate_ and intense, like I’m being stabbed by a thousand angry wasps. It pricks and crawls over my skin, and that’s when she starts screaming. The Sun Queen. She’s screaming and she’s raging inside of me. Lightning cracks over head, the thunder pounding in my chest. I strain against the bindings. There’s an explosion of white hot light and then Shaw’s equipment starts to smoke and sputter. 

Someone cuts off the power and I collapse back on the table. Sweat pours off my body in rivers. I feel so empty and drained. This constant presence that has been a part of my life for years is gone. I should be relieved, but the tears spilling down my face aren’t just from the pain. Something is missing and it’s not just Himiko.

“How is she still alive?”

Shaw’s voice sounds like it’s right above me. If the room would stop spinning, that would be nice? “Throw her overboard. Once the circuits reset we’ll siphon the child.”

Someone starts screaming. I roll my head to the right and there’s a fucking _lion_ rampaging throughout the lab.

No.. No no no. Alisha’s just a girl, she’s younger than Lara was on Yamatai. She can’t turn into a killer, she can’t be _used_ like this!

A familiar voice speaks in my head. Himiko sounds tired. She’s spent centuries locked away in a corpse, years biding her time in my head and then constantly fighting me. And now she’s stuck inside a sword from her own homeland. Maybe even one wielded by someone close to her. She can’t see, she can’t hear, but she can feel, she can hurt. After all of this, she’s kind of giving up. She just wants to _die._ I kind of pity her.

I stretch my fingers in her direction. I just need a little. Just enough to break free. Just let me save Alisha from that constant guilt. Let me save myself from drowning hundreds of miles from home. Let me save Lara from losing the last of her _family_. Then I’ll find a way to set you free. We’ll return you to the world and you can pass on like you should have a long time ago. Just let me….!

Electricity arcs across the lab and my bindings break free in a shower of sparks. I duck under a goon’s hands and roll forward like Lara taught me. When I grip the sword’s hilt, the blade glows and hums. Does this make it a lightsaber? Fuck it, this is totally a light saber. I point it at Shaw. “I have been used like an overflow container. I’ve been shot, groped, hit, stabbed, kidnapped on multiple occasions and stared at like fresh meat. I’ve lost like five cameras! And I’ve killed, I’ve killed so many people and there are nights I can’t sleep, but I’m not letting that girl get blood on her hands!” 

I think I’m crying again and my voice won’t stay steady but the sword, the sword is so steady. It’s like an extension of my arm and Himiko knows how to use it. And thanks to her, so do I. For the first time I feel like I’m in control of my own destiny. I’m not Samantha Nishimura, the vessel for the Sun Queen. I’m not Lara’s weakest link, the party girl with no future and no cares about her own life. I’m Sam. I’m Lara’s wife and partner but I’m not _defined_ by my relationship with her. I’m Sam, the owner of a multimedia empire. I’m Sam, I’m my own person and the Sun Queen’s powers are mine. This is the _last_ time I’m going to be someone’s victim!

Alisha has the henchwoman cornered. She’s going to rip the woman’s throat out, but before she can I swing the sword in that direction. Like a whip, lightning cracks through the air, hitting the woman and sending her slamming into the bulkhead. The lioness shakes head, like she’s trying to recover from the flash of light. Her features morph back into Alisha’s, and that’s when the far end of the rig lights up like a firework’s show. That’s _probably_ Lara.


	14. Bloodlust

There’s just no _time_. No time at all. Not to argue, not to reflect, we can only act. Reyes blames me - rightly so - for what happened to Alisha. For the artifact and for being taken. At least they never got into the study. Once they had Sam and Alisha they were gone. And we made the job easier for Shaw by having the power of Mehit in a sixteen year old girl. I’m so angry with myself at that. 

Soraya charters a helicopter. But where do we even look? How do we even look. It’s Amanda that gives us the answer. Laying on the couch nursing her wounds, she calls us into the room and points at the TV. A monstrous storm has formed over Finland, seemingly out of nowhere. At the eye of the storm, that’s where we’ll find Sam. And with her, Alisha. And once we have them back, I have to find a way to separate the goddess from the girl

The ride in the helicopter is tense. I stare across at Reyes, and she stares back at me. I look away, then sigh and meet her eyes again. “Joslin, I’m sorry. I don’t know how she got into the vault. She said it was as though she were being drawn to the relic. Mehit _called_ her.”

“We should destroy those things,” Reyes snaps. “I’m tired of this shit, Lara. I’m tired of getting caught up in it. Just being around you invites trouble. You can bring your new band of psychos into it, but once we get Alisha back, I… don’t think I want her around you any more.”

I don’t have a coherent protest, but it hurts. Alisha is the last link the two of us have to Roth. But the girl was put at risk because of _me_. Everyone else made the choice to. Alisha just tagged along with her mother to visit Roth’s grave. So I just nod at Reyes, and check my weapons. My axe is a comfort and the kris is heavy at my side. He knows he’ll get to feed tonight and I harden myself for what we must do.

We approach the rig, low over the water. The storm is powerful enough to cause the waves to crest almost to the rungs of the landing gear. Reyes leans forward, looking out the cockpit. “We sure this is it?”

I’m positive. “Look at the lightning. It keeps flashing in the same place, regularly.”

“The pattern it’s in looks kind of familiar,” Raya muses. She edges the heli closer to the rig. I don’t know how she’s keeping us so steady. I’d have killed us three times over by now.

“That’s because it’s the kanji for the Sun Queen.” I click the safeties off and then back on on my pistols. “The landing pad looks clear. Are we all clear on the plan?”

“I set explosives, you two clear the area,” Reyes says. “And look.” She grabs my arm. “You might be a pain in the ass, but you’re still _our_ pain in the ass. Don’t die.”

The heli bounces to a stop on the pad, skidding a little from the slickness. I’m out first, sinking the kris into the throat of the first man unlucky enough to come investigate us. Raya clears a hatch for Reyes, and then joins me as we start to work our way across the rig. We’re both wearing black, and the Lebanese mercenary is carrying a silenced M4A1. I have silencers on my pistols as well, but while Soraya concentrates on ranged targets, I weave into melee. The kris sings in my hand. The more I kill, the faster I move, until my blood is humming and all I see is a hazy shade of red.

“Lara!”

Soraya’s voice snaps me out of the bloodlust. I exhale, and very slowly pull the blade away from her throat. I slide it into my belt. “I’m good. I’m sorry.” I still don’t know how much of that is me and how much is the soul in the blade. I don’t actually want to know.

The Merc squeezes my shoulder. Lightning strikes the strange tower at the other side of the rig. It’s blinding and loud. The air hums with discharged energy, and the storm starts to dissipate. Fear seizes me and I try to bolt towards the tower. _Sam!_ But Soraya holds me back. “Wait for Reyes!”

I try to struggle and for one brief, mad moment I consider turning the Kris on to my friend. I regain control of myself and turn my head to her. “The storm has stopped. If it’s stopped then Sam could be-”

“We don’t know that. Don’t panic until you’ve got a reason to. If you lose it now we’re all dead.” She lets go of me, and I draw my pistols and nod.

“You’re right. I’m sorry, I just..”

“If it was Leda I’d feel the same way.”

Reyes catches up to us a moment later. She spares a glance at the bodies then looks at me like she’s not sure what to think. Like maybe I’m more like Roth than she wants to accept. “Everything is set. We ready?”

“Do it.”

The explosion rips through the rig. We use the chaos to sprint for the tower. I shoot two men on the way there without slowing down. One topples off the rig into the water below. There are others waiting. I think I see a glimpse of Shaw and take a shot at him but he’s gone before I can confirm a hit. Reyes is a dervish, pumping shotgun shell after shotgun shell into the people foolish enough to cover Shaw’s retreat. She’d used to be with the police, and I know she and Roth had gotten into their fair share of fights. I wonder what she really thinks of all this.

As soon as we’ve cleared the way I start to climb the stairs to the tower. The door opens easily for me, but I wait for the others before diving in. 

It’s a mess inside. Lighting flickers. There’s a burnt and mangled body against the wall, and two others on the floor. Sam is standing in the center of the lab, one arm around Alisha and the other holding a katana that crackles with electricity. They run towards us the second they see us. Sam practically leaps into my arms, and Reyes smothers Alisha in hers. For a few precious seconds it’s just me and Sam. “I guess you didn’t need us after all.”

“We wanted to give you a welcoming party but I couldn’t get the decorations up in time.”

The rig rocks suddenly and starts to list. I have a thousand questions for our girls but now is clearly not the time. “Reyes, just _what_ did you blow up?”

“I may have gone a little overboard.”

Soraya gives her a fond smile. “I always liked your idea of going overboard.”

“Don’t you even start.”

I suppose it was too much for the two of them to be in close quarters and keep the peace. “Argue later, we need to get off this rig _right_ now.”

“Hold on.” Sam rushes _back_ into the lab. Is she mad? I chase after her, but she evades my grasp.

“Sam, what are you doing? Are you all right? Did they hurt you?”

“I’m fine.” She picks up the Katana’s sheathe. “Just need to get Himiko’s sheathe here.”

“Himiko’s…” Oh. All the equipment suddenly makes sense. I’d seen it before in Shaw’s other lab, where he’d been trying to replicate the transference ritual. Had he transferred Himiko’s soul into this sword? Sam was still alive, that meant we could remove Mehit without harming Alisha. God, we’d been too late. What if that ritual had killed her? We would have been too late!

“Yeah,” Sam says, nodding at me. “But I’m really ready to go home now.” She tugs on my arm. “Lara. It’s okay. I’m okay.”

Soraya snaps from the door way. “If you two are done screwing around, the rig is sinking.”

Taking Sam’s hand, I drag her out of the lab after Raya and Reyes. “Go after them.”

“Lara, what the fuck are you doing?”

“I’m going after Shaw. Wait five minutes, no longer, do you understand?”

She searches my eyes, then throws her head back and groans. “Lara Croft, you march your butt back to our ride or so help me god I’ll take you over my knee. You’re not going after Shaw. He’s _gone_. Don’t play a hero over something stupid!”

“Are you threatening to _spank_ me?” I ask, baffled, as Sam starts to push me after the others. 

“Who said anything about a _threat_.”

Sam has come a long way since we crashed in Peru. I need to talk to her about the sword, and what happened with Himiko. She’s right. Trying to catch Shaw would only get me hurt or killed. But my instincts don’t want to let him go. I want to see his corpse, I want to make him suffer. But Sam won't let me budge. I know I can easily break her grip, I know I can get to Shaw, I _know_. But the rig rocks beneath us and I realize there's no time.

We run pell mell for the helicopter. Raya is already spinning up the props while Reyes gets Alisha strapped in. I make Sam climb in first before I follow. We’re three hundred feet in the air when the rig suddenly tilts onto it’s side, sending a plum of water high enough to splash at the cockpit windshield. I glance at Sam as I all but pull her into my lap, and she just smirks at me. I start to wonder who’s the more dependent one in this relationship. I can function when she’s in danger but that’s mostly autopilot.

“Where to?” Soraya asks.

“We agreed to meet the others in London. Winston reserved us a hotel suite under a false name. We need time to regroup and recoup.”

“You need time,” Reyes interrupted. “I’m taking Alisha home.”

“You can’t!” Sam waves her hands in front of her, then makes cat clawing motions. “She shapeshifted into a lion! She was gonna rip those guys new assholes if I hadn’t convinced Himiko to help us!”

We all look at Alisha in unison. The girl looks distressed. “I don’t even remember any of that.”

“We’ll figure it out.” Reyes hugs her daughter against her. “It’s okay baby.” 

“Samantha is right,” Soraya chimes in. “We can’t risk her hurting someone on accident, and she shouldn’t have to carry that guilt around if she does.”

“I don’t want to hurt anyone. But it’s like there’s something curled up inside of me. Waiting. Like I told Sam, she’s patient. She’ll wait you all out if she has to.”

Reyes’ jaw tightens, and she gives me a look as if demanding that I fix this. I don’t know how, but I’m going to. Maybe we can replicate some of what Shaw has done. It worked to pull the Sun Queen out of Sam, but it looks like it took a lot out of her. We can’t do anything until we know we can do it for Alisha safely. There may be something in my father’s notes. I’ll have to pour over them again, and brainstorm with Amanda and Soraya. Whatever I can find out for that girl in Japan will certainly help Alisha, and vice versa, too.

Winston chose a five bedroom suite for us. We take a taxi from the airport, and Sam keeps giggling as the unsuspecting busboy loads up suitcases full of weapons to roll up to the suit. I try to shush her but she just seems really giddy. I guess having another person’s soul sucked out of one’s body can be liberating. It resembles her when she’s been up all night, anyway.

“I wish we could have salvaged some of that equipment for Alisha.” I keep my voice low as we walk to the elevator.

“No. Oh no. We’ll find another way but it won’t be that.” Sam slides her arm around my waist. She’s carrying the sword with her other hand, wrapped up in a jacket. “It hurt.I mean childbirth probably hurts less. We’re _not_ putting that girl through that.”

There’s a fiercely protective tone in Sam’s voice. She looks at Alisha as we crowd into the elevator. I suppose the girl has another guardian now. There’s confidence in Sam’s voice I only usually really hear when she’s talking film, and it’s reassuring. I kiss the side of her head. “Are you’re going to tell me what happened before we got there at any point?”

“Later,” she promises. “I’m still trying to...it was really weird, okay?”

“It’s okay, but I don’t know if it can wait too long.” 

The others are already inside the suite when we come in. Alisha runs for the bathroom and Reyes collapses into a cushioned chair. Kwesi is sitting on the balcony, so I check with him first. “How are you feeling?”

He looks up at me with his trademark smile. “Ah, I’ve been better. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen action like that. It makes me feel young and foolish again.”

“Well you certainly look young, but not foolish.” I lean against the balcony railing and fold my arms. Behind and below me, a pool is lit up for late night swimmers, but there doesn’t seem to be anyone around.

The man laughs, then holds his side. “Oh, but I worry about you and your family. You are caught up in something terrible and I fear before it’s all over, someone won’t be coming home.”

“Let me worry about that, Kwesi. I’m not leaving anyone behind.”

“That is not always for us to decide.” He shifted in his seat, trying to get comfortable, so I help him with a pillow. He squeezes my arm. “I’ve been thinking about that girl. Alisha. And these artifacts you’ve spoken of. Our bodies are vessels for our souls, and they’re not made to hold more than one. Eventually, that goddess will force Alisha out.”

“There’s a ritual, but I don’t think Shaw has been doing it right.”

“ _Exactly_. It’s not something you can force. It’s something that has to be done naturally.” His smile falters. “Well. As natural as this entire situation can be. Perhaps she needs to be drawn out.”

I make him promise to rest, then head back inside. Everyone has arranged themselves around the suite’s common area. Leda has her head on Soraya’s lap and her feet in Sam’s. I roll my eyes at them, and sit next to Amanda on the other couch. She’s staring at Sam’s camera and looks almost shaken.

“What is it?”

She wets her lips, then turns the screen so I can see it. She’s zoomed in on a figure, and I realize that must be the seventh person that I’d thought I saw. I take the camera to get a better look. There’s something really familiar about him. No, about _her_. I hiss the name out like a curse. “Gio _vanna_.”

Amanda snatches the camera back and looks at it again. “Wait, you _know her_?”

I get up, pulling Amanda with me and into one of the bedroom. “Yes, she led us to a book in the Vatican, and then accompanied us on our lead in Turkey.” 

“Remember how I told you about...Brazil. The shadow people and losing my … friend?”

“Yes…” There was some hesitation in her voice and I look at her quizzically.

“My friend was Giovanna’s sister. And if she’s… That’s her, she was there, she’s mixed up with Shaw. I don’t know what it means but if I see her again I’m going to hit her.”

I give her shoulder a pat, since the only people I’ve seen her let close enough for physical contact have been Kwesi and Jonah. Though she did let Sam hug her. Amanda is a lot like me, and it takes a lot to let someone that close. “She doesn’t know we know. We can use that to get some information out of her.”

“We should tell the others.”

“Sam is never going to let me live this down. The two practically beat each other up.”

Amanda laughs. The sound is strained. “Did she win?”

“She was going to until I intervened, I think. I’ve never seen Sam get like that before, but I think she was still upset at how Giovanna introduced herself.” I take the camera back and look at it again. She’d been there at the Hanging Gardens, and she was with Shaw’s men. There’s no doubt of that in my mind now. That woman used us. “You know, I think I have an idea.”

I want to take the fight to Shaw. He has all these artifacts. I still remember the experiments in his lab, and now he threatened Sam and Alisha. I have a brief moment of imagining the look on his face when I sink that kris into his neck, then shake it off.

Giovanna, our presumed friend who’d been so helpful in Rome and Turkey, was a Shaw plant. But we can use that. I call her, and tell her we have another lead. She’s more than happy to meet us at the hotel, but I don’t want it to look like we’re waiting in ambush. Sam and Reyes take Alisha to buy some changes of clothes for all of us. Sam goes reluctantly. She’d given me plenty of ‘I told you sos’ when we’d revealed what Amanda had discovered, but we need Giovanna to believe we’re still in the dark. It’s not that I don’t believe that Sam is a good actress, but her emotions run high around Giovanna and I’m trying to _avoid_ violence. 

When Amanda opens the door for her, there’s a moment of surprise on the Italian woman’s face. She wasn’t expecting Amanda, but she recovers quickly enough and hugs the blonde woman. Amanda’s height is the only thing saving her from faceplanting into Giovanna’s impressive cleavage. The red-head is dressed like she’d come in from the club and Sam’s nickname for her of ‘tits mcgee’ never seemed more apropos.

“It’s so good to see you! How long has it been? Two years? Three?”

Half-afraid that the blonde is going to murder Giovanna, I step in to save her. “I take it you two know each other?”

Amanda squeezes out of Giovanna’s grip, shooting me a grateful look before responding. “We go back a ways. I met her sister when I was overseas.”

“Fia and Amanda became such fast friends, too. A lot like you and Sam, I’m certain.”

Amanda looks distinctly uncomfortable. Giovanna remembers that Sam and I had fallen in love and gotten _married_ , doesn’t she? She rolls her eyes. “Yeah, we went crawling around old ruins a lot too.”

I take Giovanna’s arm. “Lets go out to the balcony and chat.” There’s no easy way for her to escape if she realized we’re on to her from there. She’d have to get past Kwesi, Soraya, Amanda and Leda. I shoot a look at Amanda, trying to tell her that we’ll talk later but I don’t know if she catches it. I grab a bottle and a pair of glasses on the way out.

On the balcony, I pour us a drink and lean against the railing. “Any luck on your end?”

She shakes her head and takes the glass I offer her. “No, I’ve come across nothing but dead ends in my research. Once we lost the artifact in Turkey, everything seems to have dried up. You?”

“We had some leads, but our initial trip turned up fruitless,” I tell her. Her face remains impassive, the scar curving across her nose lending her a dangerous air. Giovanna seems to rely on mystery and intimidation, because she really can’t fight. “We found what I believe were the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, but Shaw beat us there first.” I don’t have to feign the bitterness in my voice, or the anger I still feel over what happened there. “I don’t know what he did, but the actions of his people destroyed a priceless historical location! Some of those plants were thought to be _extinct_.”

Giovanna’s surprise was disingenuous, and any further doubts on my part washed away. “That’s terrible! What do you think happened?”

“My guess is they pulled the relic out in an improper manner. Damaged whatever..effect was keeping the Gardens alive.”

Giovanna purse her lips, and took a sip from her glass. She turns to look out from the balcony, and I turn around too. “That’s a disturbing thought. What if there’d been someway to use that on people? We could extend someone’s life. If they were sick or injured it would be doubly valuable.”

“That hadn’t even occurred to me. Have any of your contacts gotten word on where Shaw is headed next? I believe that we need to be the ones ahead of the game now. We keep getting there much too late.”

“What makes you think I have any idea what he’s up to?”

I shrug, and set my glass down. “You’ve proven resourceful, and I’m hunting down every lead that I can. Giovanna, when was the last time you were in the Middle-east?”

The woman suddenly jabs something into my right side. My body spasms. It doesn’t hurt except for a localized burning sensation, but I lose all control and tip over the edge of the balcony. I feel Giovanna give me a light shove and then I’m falling. I can’t even grab on to anything because my limbs aren’t responding.

When I hit the water, it’s like running into a wall. All the air rushes from my lungs and I’m dazed. I try to swim, try to move anything but my motions are jerky, and useless. Someone grabs on to me, and I feel a rush of relief until I realize that _they’re holding me under!_


	15. Chasing GHosts

I’m _not_ happy with Lara. The last thing I want to do is be out shopping while she’s possibly in danger. Ironic right? I usually love shopping, especially when I’m doing it with people and it’s doing a good job of keeping Alisha distracted. It’s one of the things that makes me happy. At least that’s what I used to tell myself. Bad day? Go shopping. Parents ignoring me? Go shopping. Unresolved sexual tension with Lara? Go shopping. But it’s always a fleeting happiness. Reyes is being a grump and it takes me ten whole minutes to talk her into letting me pay. But it’s so worth it. I like Alisha’s style, and I’m all about enabling her. Now _that’s_ something to make me happy. Spending money on other people.

We get out of the cab at the hotel, hit the elevator and make our way down the hall to our suite. Giovanna is backing out of the suite, a gun pointed towards the door. She turns and runs towards us. I grab Alisha and pull her aside, and really I want to chase the bitch down, but I get a terrible feeling in my chest and run into the suite.

Inside, I’m just in time to see Soraya mid leap as she jumps off the balcony. Why is she… I don’t see Lara. _I don’t see Lara_. I push people out of the way and sprint to the balcony. Looking down, I see Raya fighting someone in the pool. There’s a body face down. I’m half-way over the railing before someone grabs me.

“Sam, no!”

“That’s Lara! Lara’s down there! What the fuck! Let me go, let me go!” I strain against Amanda. She’s lanky but she’s actually pretty strong. If I’d had Himiko still I...don’t know what I would have done.

Amanda drags me into the suite and forces me onto the couch. She pins me to it. “Calm the fuck down! There’s nothing we can do from here!”

I squirm underneath her, and manage to hook my foot under her leg. It doesn’t really budge her but I feel a little better for putting the effort in. “We have to get to her!”

“Not by jumping!” Amanda sits up. She’s straddling me now, and running her hands through her hair.

“Raya jumped!”

“Raya is crazy!” The blonde woman gets up and offers me her hand. I take it, and we run out the door. If the others follow us I don’t notice. The elevator is taking too long, so I run into the stairwell and slide down the railing. Amanda is right behind me.

“What floor is the pool!?”

Leda calls out from somewhere above me. “Two flights down!”

Paramedics and police have already responded when we make it to the pool. We get there in time to watch one take over CPR on Lara rom Soraya. Whoever had attacked her is unconscious and bleeding, but the only thing I can focus on is Lara. Lara having the water pumped out of her lungs. Lara being loaded into an ambulance. Lara hooked up to machines inside. It’s like all my nightmares coming back to life. Like Yamatai and Peru all over again. Helpless to do anything but watch her and pray. She’d been so badly hurt once her wounds had caught up to her.

I don’t leave her side once we get to the hospital. People walk in and out. Doctors check in on her, nurses. Raya stops by for awhile. Jonah takes up camp on a chair in the corner, and Reyes hovers by the door until he convinces her to come in. I sleep. Maybe. Amanda tries to talk me into taking a walk but I threaten to handcuff myself to the bed.

It’s really late when Reyes sits by me. “Shades of deja vu, huh.”

“Yeah.” I tear my eyes from Lara to look at her.

“Doctor says she’ll probably be awake by morning. It’ll be okay, Sam. Your girl is tough. She’s seen herself and us through worse.” There’s grudging respect in her voice. Like I know she hates the trouble we get her into, but at least she still cares, kind of?

“Still mad at her for the whole...lion goddess statue thing?” I look back at Lara. Why won’t she wake up?

“Mostly. Seems like you can’t help that shit, and she’s Roth’s daughter. She said wants to explore the world. Discover new things.”Reyes smiles wanly and shrugs her shoulders. It sounds like her worst fear.

“Sorry. We’ll help her, though. We’re so close to a break through.” But god, when I see Giovanna again I’m gonna cut a bitch. I’m going to ram Himiko right into her chest and let the Sun Queen turn her to _ash_. Then I’ll laugh all maniacally and probably freak Lara out. It’ll be great.

“I know you will. It’s just...fucking frustrating.”

“And scary,” I add for her. 

“Yeah, that too. You get some rest, Sam. I’m gonna take Alisha… I don’t know yet. I’ll see if Raya has a safe house. We can’t stay here, or go back to the hotel. And I don’t know if the mansion is safe.”

Safe houses. We’re talking about safe houses now. What is my life? Is James Bond going to walk in any second. I rub at my eyes. Okay, God, if you’re up there, once all this crap is over can we get a nice break please? I don’t know if he answers, but I finally get to sleep.

There’s that city again. Some of the buildings must be a thousand feet tall. Spinnerets and spires, rows of gleaming silver stepped pyramids and a gigantic golden pyramid at the top of a hill. It looks like the ones at Giza, but much much bigger. Lara would have a field day with this place.

It’s warm and humid like standing on a beach on the Mediterranean. And it’s bustling with people. So many people. Men and women going to market and gathering for a parade, all wearing colorful clothing. Some of them have painted their faces flashy colors, others have more subdued make-up. It honestly looks a lot like any crowd in any big city. Most everyone has skin in shades ranging from obsidian to gold or bronze. I find myself walking down a grand avenue, but I’m pushed off to the side by the swelling crowd. 

An army marches down the street, trumpets blaring in triumph at some mighty victory or something. They are led by a tall, dark-skinned man in resplendent golden armor, but the whole of the army seems to shine. They have steel plates on their chests and helmets with fearsome creatures for faceplates, but their legs and arms are exposed. Some of their commanders are women, and there are more in the long procession. 

I think they kind of resemble a cross between Roman and Egyptian soldiers. Their heraldry has some kind of segmented circle on it. Behind them are people carrying the spoils of war. Treasures. Artifacts, including _several_ crystal skulls.

I climb up onto a wall to get a better view. The leader of the army dismounts from his horse. I hear people whispering his name, but most call him the Captain General. He is greeted by the same woman I'd seen doing that ritual. They embrace, but the priestess looks at me. Her eyes are dark amber and they hold a hundred truths.

Three. The number three. Citizens, Generals and the Priesthood. I lose that train of thought as I come back to myself. I don't have Himiko in me any more, but she still seems so familiar. I almost think they’re related.

My face is smushed against something warm and soft. I lift my head and stare into Amanda’s sapphire eyes. This is awkward. I sit up so quickly my head spins. “Uh. Sorry. Did I drool on you?”

“No. It’s okay. I didn’t want to wake you up.” Amanda wipes at her sleeve and makes a face. “Okay, you drooled a little.”

“I’m a heiress, that’s probably worth a little something on Ebay.” We’re getting along okay. She seems to have thawed a little. There are bags underneath her pretty eyes and she must be as exhausted as I feel. “You look like you could use a nap too.”

“I dozed off a little.” She frowns, looking towards the bed with Lara in it. “You’d think she’d be awake by now.”

“The paramedics had to resuscitate her. If Soraya hadn’t been so fast I don’t know what would have happened.” It had been a long fall, if she hadn’t landed in water I’d be a widow. The thought makes my stomach upset and I instinctively take Lara’s hand. “I dunno. She’s not in a coma. The doc says she could wake up any time. But I’m….really worried.”

“I wonder what she’s dreaming about.” Amanda rests her hand on the edge of the bed, and I feel this… okay I’m jealous. Lara is _mine_ what is she even doing here? But that’s not at all fair. Lara doesn’t make friends easily and I’m starting to trust Amanda. She’s been through a lot with us.

But I’m still a little worried. Like maybe Lara won’t want to spend as much time with me and I dunno what I’d do then. “Hopefully something good.”

Lara’s face has contorted a little. Her brows are furrowed, and her heart rate has increased. I glance at Amanda, then back at Lara. “I guess it’s something bad.” This sucks!

My wife seems to settle down after a few more moments, and I let myself breathe again, settling back in the uncomfortable chair and fidgeting with the hem of my shirt. Lara doesn’t do anything more and the silence stretches so long it makes me uncomfortable. “So uhm.” I realize I know almost nothing about Amanda. She’s smart, she’s an anthropologist, and like Lara, she doesn’t let many people get in close. I still can’t believe she’s dating Jonah.

The big man is fast asleep. He looks like a teddy bear. He even looks comfortable all zonked out like that, I don’t know how he does it. And the freaky thing is he was army. He knows how to handle a gun and he’s scary good at it. “How did you two meet, anyway?”

“I was in Hawaii attending a conference.” Amanda starts to perk up a little. Good. Jonah deserves someone who’s head over heels for him and she doesn’t really seem like the type to just gush about a guy but she’s so low key about it I was worried.

“You’re telling me that you met _Jonah_ at some kind of archaeological conference?”

Amanda throws her head back and laughs. She covers her mouth when she realizes how loud that sounded. “Oh god no. He’s a smart man but that’s not really his kind of thing. I met him on a beach. He’d set up a barbeque and was just feeding people for free. He was...cute and sweet, and it had been a really long time since I let myself relax. Or flirt. You should have seen the swimsuit I was wearing. I think his eyes popped out of their sockets.”

“I can imagine.” And I can and it’s hot and no Sam, bad Sam. Amanda smirks like she _knows_.

“So I ended up hanging around Hawaii for a lot longer than I’d meant to. And his grandmother practically adopted me.” Her smile falter for a second. Like she’d just thought of something sad. “I’ve been chasing after ghosts. Before Brazil, I wanted to find something to make a name for myself. But then I lost Fia. And … I wanted to know why. I wanted to know what those _things_ were. So...chasing ghosts. I ended up… It doesn’t matter. Jonah was the first person that sat there and listened to me and he didn’t judge and he … “ She snorts and starts to withdraw into herself. “I don’t deserve anyone like that.”

“That’s bullshit. Come on. He’s really into you and he’s one of the best men I’ve ever met. He knows when something bad is coming, he cooks _really_ good food, and he’d defend all of us to the death. He’s like...part of my family.” I guess that might make Amanda part of it too. Still not sure how I feel about that. “Fia was Tits McGee’s sister?”

“Giovanna is the evil twin. Literally.” Amanda remarks, her eyes rolling so far into her head I see nothing but white. “Fia had a temper, but she was more genuine. Giovanna is all fake smiles and manipulation. Fia would sooner just hit you if she didn’t like you, but she was...it wasn’t something she just did. You had to earn it.”

“I think I’d like her.” I wonder at their relationship. They must have been so close, like Lara and me. Amanda picks at the skin around her thumbnail, and shrugs her shoulders. The way she says Fia’s name makes me suspicious, but rather than blurt crap out I’ll let her talk.

“Don’t know what she’d think about any of this. I wouldn’t even be here if she was alive. I’d be… I don’t know where. Lecturing somewhere. On a dig. Having her charm funding for us out of unsuspecting rich people. She was really good at that part. It feels like my career has stagnated. “

“Well, you’re getting fast tracked. I don’t know much about your field but I do know that it compliments Lara’s, and you’re really good about explaining things to the camera, so I think I want to keep you.” I flash a grin at her, but she folds her arms over her chest. “Remind me to get you talking about the gardens again…When you’re up for it.”

“Fucking Shaw.” She unfolds her arms, then reaches over and digs her nails into my wrist. “That beautiful place, _gone_. I’m glad that Fia never got to see it. It would have broken her heart.”

The marks she leaves on my skin tells me that it bothers Amanda more than she’s even admitting. I change the subject. “You have to tell me how you’re dating Jonah and you haven’t gained eighty pounds.”

Amanda gives me a grateful smile. “Lots of exercise.”

Come to think of it, I haven’t had many friends to just chat with like this in a long time. Time for the gossip. I poke her in the arm. “Details. Stat.”


	16. What Does It Mean To Be A Croft?

I’m walking on top of the snow. I leave no footprints because of that. To the west I see a group of people in a camp. They’re too far away to see clearly, but there are maybe a dozen men and women. Wrapping my arms around myself, I walk closer. Some of them look really familiar. One face in particular cuts through me like a sharp knife.

“..Roth??” I rush forward, but it’s like moving through water. Even my voice sounds faint, and tinny. With each step, I’m pushed back. I’m fighting a current that’s keeping me away from Roth. _Roth!_. He’s talking to Grimm! But there’s something really wrong about it all. They look younger. There’s less grey in Roth’s hair and his face is less lined. Grimm doesn’t look too much different. He has more hair on his grey head, and his mustache is somehow bushier but it’s still good old Grimm. He was always the crazy uncle of the family, and I mean that in a good way. It’s so good to see them! I don’t see Alex though, and that hurts. If Roth and Grimm are here, I’d expect to see him. I have so much I need to apologize for. To all of them.

A young woman pulls her parka back. She's at least six feet tall with brass skin and hazel eyes. Her face has very pronounced cheekbones. It's only when she smiles that I recognize that cocky grin as Soraya. She can't be any older than I was when I embarked on the Endurance for Yamatai. She's confident and _so_ beautiful, but comparing her here to how I knew her, age and experience only made her more alluring.

I’d last seen all three of them as seasoned warriors with a lifetime of pain in their eyes, and I’m beginning to get a gnawing worry in my stomach. It’s like I’m getting a glimpse into the past, into something I was never meant to see. Roth. I miss him _so_ much. I could really use his advice right now. 

A man joins them, clapping his hand on Roth’s shoulder. When he turns to face Grimm, it feels like I’ve been shot in the heart. _It’s my father._ The sounds of the world around me ring hollow. My blood pounds in my ears and I have to fight against the current again. I have to get closer, I have to know for sure. I have to _talk to him_. _Yell at him._ There’s so much to say. So much to ask. I have to know if I’ve made him proud. Finally, I reach them, but they don’t notice me. I run right through my father and collapse onto my knees.

None of this is real. I don’t know where I am. Or when. Behind me are three people who meant so much to me. Alive, when they should be dead. My friend, my new mentor in some ways, is as young and innocent as I was just a few years ago. And as I look up and see my _mother_ approaching, the tears flow freely down my face. She’s more beautiful than I remembered, and her eyes are harder. Just like Soraya had said.

They break camp, and I can’t budge. People walk through me but I don’t pay attention. I can only stare at my parents and Roth as they prepare to guide this expedition… somewhere. I don’t understand. Roth hadn’t said he’d been there at the end, and I’m almost _certain_ this is the last day of their lives. There’s a finality in the air that’s unmistakable. They’re marching to their doom.

And there’s _Shaw_. The rest of the expedition appears to be him and his men. Dragging myself to my feet, I fall into line with everyone as they start to explore deeper into the mountains. Things start to click into place. Tibet. This must be the Himalayas. He has to have met Dolma and her mother by now. Dolma would be very young.

As we march, I can hear my father talking with Roth and Shaw. There’s tension between them and the bastard. Voices are strained. Good, I’m glad they don’t trust him. My father mentions something about the ‘Shaanxi trip’ and I make a mental note about that. China and Tibet. Everything seems to come back to Tibet. I think I’ll be going there sooner rather than later.

My mother walks with Soraya. I get the feeling as though she’s taken the girl under her wing. This is of interest to me. I’ve never forgotten what Soraya had told me about my mother. About this flow to combat she and my father shared. I still can’t believe that Amelia Croft could ever have a combat flow, but I have no reason to disbelieve the mercenary. She got to see sides of my mother I never did. I’m going to have more questions after this.

I want to see my mother’s face more, to get closer to them, but there’s that feeling of running against the current again. Whatever is going to happen I can only be an observer to. I can’t interact, I can’t _stop_ what I suspect is coming. I don’t think I’m ready for this.

We travel for hours through snowy canyons and across deadly chasms. I don’t learn much more than I had earlier. Enough to know I wanted to return to tibet and make a stop in Shaanxi Province on the way. The province has come up twice since that first mention and I’ve learned to trust my gut.

The first sense of something wrong crawls over my skin as we enter a cavern. My father stops and inspect some runes. Familiar faces guard this place. Just like Costa Rica, just like Peru and Turkey. Warnings of something arcane and deadly inside. They don’t phase my father. He’s seen them before. He’s dealt with them before. What other secrets are locked away in his notes? 

“Richard, take a look at this.” Shaw gestures him over. They inspect some other markings. One looks vaguely familiar. “Just like in China, isn’t it?”

“And in Libya.” He takes a rubbing of the mark, and they move on. My mother links her arm through my father’s and says, “More weight for your theory. Keep this up and maybe you’ll even convince Lara that Atlantis exists.” 

They all laugh. Even when I was twelve I’d staunchly believed my father was nuts. How wrong I’d been. I’d wasted so much time running away from him and now I’ve run headlong to finish the work he’d started.

I pause by the rune. It’s a circular shape, segmented. I’ve seen it before, on a figurine I’d found in Malta. At the Hanging Gardens too but I’d been running too fast to really get a good look. My father had spun that mad story about Atlantis out of that figurine. Have I missed some kind of link that goes beyond the tortured faces and the powers the skulls possess? I’d never believed him. Even when I was a child I hadn’t been willing to just believe. You’d think that would be when you’d believe the most.

The expedition has paused. I doubt they are waiting for me, so I walk through Grimm to see what’s holding it up. There’s a gaping chasm filled with that terrible black water. I shudder. They could wade through it, but that has it’s obvious risks. Touching that grime always creates those creatures. I never know what to call them. Shadow puppets. They’re so corpse like, yet their faces are so unnatural. 

The gap is too far to jump. But it turns out they have a rather simple solution. Some of the guides are carrying pieces of a portable bridge, and in almost no time at all everyone is crossing, single file. Almost everyone. Two of Shaw’s men hang back. They kneel on the edge of the water and dip their hands inside. Then they stand and rush to catch up with everyone else. 

“Oh my god…”

I knew Shaw was going to betray them. I run down the tunnel, stymied by that damned current. It’s getting frustrating, stronger, and it pushes me right back to the chasm. Any time I want to rush or hurry it holds me back. I have to warn my father!

That thought stops me in my tracks. How can I warn him? If I’m right, this has already happened. Somehow I’m getting to watch it unfold, and I can’t change the outcome. I’m going to finally learn what happened to my parents, and god _I don’t want to see this_!

Roth and Raya are here. And Grimm. They all knew. They all _knew_. I spent half my life questioning what happened to my parents when there were people who knew. These people looked me in the eye and they could have just _told_ me! I’ve wasted so much energy trying to understand and they could have just told me! I don’t even know if it would have cleared anything up, but I could have handled it. I _know_ I could have.

I’m seething by the time I find them again. Ready to shout, to scream at them. And I do until my throat is hoarse and my eyes are burning from the tears. It does no good. They can’t hear me. I’m chasing ghosts. But I feel better getting it out.

I follow them through an antechamber. This reminds me of the videos Sam took from Peru, when she’d retrieved her skull, and shares some similarities to what we’d found in Costa Rica. But we’re on the other side of the world. I turn to Soraya, about to explain my theory, when I remember that she doesn’t even know that I’m here. She can’t see me, can’t touch me. If I really _am_ witnessing something that happened nearly fifteen years ago, she only really knows me as a child.

We enter the main chamber. Roth and Grimm start setting up some of my father’s equipment. I notice that Shaw’s men spread out, positioning themselves in a way that’s suspicious. It’s an ambush. It’s heartening to see that Roth is concerned too. He whispers something in a harsh tone to Grimm and the older man nods. He discreetly adjusts a gun at his belt.

The main chamber is gigantic. Much larger than any of the relic chambers that I’ve seen before. The walls are lined with precious metals and colorful gems, and it all leads the eye to a massive dias at the far end of the wall. It almost looks like a throne. Embedded into the ‘backrest’ is another skull. This one shines with a golden light, but unlike the others, my attention is drawn to it’s eyes. They’re dark. Black, and within them are countless stars. And it’s face is longer, more drawn with prominent cheek bones.

“Don’t stare too long,” Shaw says. He laughs, but it’s a joyless one. “You’re liable to get lost.”

My father rests his hand on the top of the skull. I don’t know why, but the sight fills me with a great deal of dread. He doesn’t say anything and it remains deathly quiet. My mother walks around the outskirts of the room, studying the walls and the stories that are written on them. I follow her. When I try to study the walls more closely, they seem to move and shift. The pictures change, and go blurry and I only get bits and pieces of the story. War and conquest, and then overwhelming darkness flooding the land. An end to all things. I step behind the throne and nearly fall into a thin chasm. I try to look down it, but it’s very deep.

Mother stops in front of the skull, turning around and looking in the direction that it’s facing. “It’s like it’s waiting for something. Look here.” She walks forward a few steps, until she’s standing on a circular design. It’s segmented like the carving on the wall outside, and the etching in my figurine back home. “There are places all along the circumference of this circle. I’d wager anything if we found the rest of the skulls and related artifacts, they’d all fit right in here.”

“And then what happens next?” Soraya kneels next to the circle, fingering one indentation.

“There were all those hoaxes about these skulls. Gathering them together to unlock great power and knowledge.” Shaw approaches them, and kneels next to Soraya. “How many Prime relics did you think there were, Richard?”

“Seven. Six plus that golden one on the throne in here.” My father joins them, looking down at the circle. “And there are six evenly spaced. Step back a little. Ten more arranged in the gaps.”

“All that’s missing is the one-twenty-eight,” Shaw muses, rubbing his jaw and looking around. “But I don’t think that’s crucial.”

“It may not be.” My father straightens and brushes his trousers off. “But I still believe that the number is important. It’s just a matter of finding out _why_.”

“If anyone can do it, it’s a Croft.” Roth claps a hand on my father’s shoulder, and leans his head in a little. From my angle I can see him jerking his head and eyebrows ever so slightly.

My father smiles. It’s tight-lipped. Tense. He’s gotten the message. “I’ll figure it out.”

Whatever else he might have said is lost as shadowy figures shamble out of the darkness. One turns, faster than humanly possible, and rips into one of Shaw’s men. A second rushes in, and then a third and a fourth. I don’t understand. Only two of the men touched the water, why are there so many? Like I’ve seen so many times, they’ve pale, deathly skin with patches of the night sky. The ones here have faces more like that of the skull. Not quite human.

There’s just...chaos. Roth has one of his pistol out, pushing my parents behind him as he opens fire on some of the shadow people. Soraya and Grimm are pinned down in another part of the chamber. I can’ see where Shaw has gone, but then after a moment it’s impossible to pull my eyes from my parents. I didn’t want to see this, but now that it’s here, I can’t look away.

_There’s a flow to combat. Each pulse of your heart surges into the next, each step you take beats in time to the rush of blood in your veins. Your parents were in step with each other. Like extensions of each other’s body and mind. It was like a dance. A deadly one._

I’ve never seen my mother even hold a gun before. Her eyes are hard. They’re familiar, like the ones that stare back at me in the mirror. She stands with her back to my father. One of the creatures dashes forward, and they step aside together. My father twists, shooting it in the head, and my mother turns in the other direction, shooting down another that has flanked Roth. And that’s how they fight. They’re extensions of each other, covering each other’s back, moving in sync as though they’ve spent a lifetime doing this.

My mother with her kind smile and my father who’d always laughed around me aren’t here. I look down at my own hands. Is this what it means to be a Croft? _You’re a Croft, Lara_. Roth had said. He’d said that, knowing the hardness on my father’s face in this moment, and probably in others. 

When I’d left to track down the medkit and the beacon, he’d given me this wistful, sad look. I wonder if he’d known what I had the potential to become. Known that I had the potential to do great things. Or terrible ones. I want to _join_ them. My blood is boiling. I want to help, I want to kill these things and Shaw too. I want to show them I’ve _earned_ my name. Childish of me. But part of me as always wanted to know that they approved.

In the chaos of the fight, my parents finally get separated. My mother is swarmed by the things. Someone screams and I hear my own voice. She can’t hear me. No one can. My father moves to help her, but his back blossoms red. I turn my head to see Shaw and his smoking gun. 

The world fades around me. I’m standing in darkness and it’s _so cold_. I can’t stop crying, sniveling like a small child. My world collapses onto me. 

When I open my eyes, I’m standing in the snow. The manor rises up above me like some kind of temple. It’s cold, snowflakes falling from a cloud-covered sky, the trees growing white underneath the falling powder. There’s someone sitting on a bench, huddled over. I wipe my eyes and walk closer. I look at my twelve year old self and sit next to her. She leans against me as I put my arm around her.

“They’re not coming back, are they.”

“I’m afraid not.” My voice shakes. 

“They promised they would. I’m going to be alone forever.”

“No, you’re not. You won’t be alone, and you’ll find the reasons you need to push on.”

Younger me turns and wraps her arms around my shoulders. That’s all it takes before I start crying again, burying my face into a warm shoulder and letting out years of grief in painful, violent sobs.

“There there…” My mother’s voice brings me back to myself. Her hand rubs gently at my back. I look up into her eyes, as kind as I remember them being. “We’re both so _proud_ of you. You’ve accomplished more than we ever could have, and you’ve been so strong.”

She cups my face. “You can put it all together.”

Another arm rests on my shoulders, and the familiar scent of Roth. I turn, digging my hands into his chest. “After all, you’re a Croft.”

“But what does that _mean!?_ ”

They’re gone, and I’m standing in front of my father again. I want to ask him a thousand things. “What do I have to put together? What does it mean to be a Croft?” And there’s so much more to ask. Am I going to send Sam to an early grave? Would he even _like_ her. I don’t even know how my parents or Roth would have reacted to me marrying a woman. And why did he leave a relic with Dolma’s mother and how did he know I’d find them some day? How do I stop Shaw? What am I stopping him from doing? But my father says nothing. So I step closer. He doesn’t move, but it’s as though we’re still the same distance apart. Even when I walk. Even when I start _running_. Sprinting as fast as I can but my father _is always out of reach_.

When next I open my eyes, I’m laying in bed. Machinery beeps, and it takes all my willpower to not panic and start ripping out the ivs. I might have anyway, if Sam hadn’t virtually materialized into my view. It’s a relief to see her face. I feel like I’ve run a marathon and I start to get pieces of what had happened. “Sam… remind me, next time, to not confront someone on a balcony.”


	17. Waking

Seeing Lara open her eyes makes most of my aches and pains fade into the background. Jonah’s gone to get us something to eat, so it’s just Amanda, Reyes and me to greet her.

“Next time, sweetie, you’re not sending me shopping.”

“ _You_ turn down a shopping trip?” Lara starts to push herself up. I don’t know if she should, but she seems surprisingly alert for someone who’d been mysteriously unconscious for so long. “Is everyone else okay?”

Amanda answers. “Soraya has a black eye, but that’s it. Giovanna escaped. She pulled a gun before anyone could react.” 

I glance at Amanda. So that makes more sense. I figure if Tits McGee hadn’t been armed she would be in custody right now. “I knew it. I _knew_ that bitch was gonna play us!”

Reyes holds up her hand. “Yeah, we know. We know.” to Lara, she adds. “Sam won’t shut up about it.”

Damn right I won’t shut up about it.

“The two never did get along.” Lara looks between me and Amanda, noting that we’re sitting next to each other. At least I think that explains the way she raises her eyebrows. I’m a little mifffed. I can totally get along with her friends and not _all_ of them are royal douche canoes. I mean, I get jealous. I’ll admit it. I can be a little ( a lot ) insecure. Lara is so gorgeous. But she put a ring on my finger. On _my_ finger. I sometimes wonder if I’ll wake up some day and none of it will be true. I’m not sure I’d want to live in a world without her.

But I’m totally making friends with Amanda. So there. I stick my tongue out at her and she grins at me.

“So when I can get out of here?”

“Not until the doctor checks on you. But after that we’re gone.”

Lara nods, seeming to accept that, and lays back down. A few years ago she’d be trying to crawl out the window. Lara _hates_ hospitals, but maybe she thinks she just can’t get past the three of us. She turns her head back in my direction. “So where is Soraya?”

There’s something unusually cold in her voice. I can practically see the ice dripping off of Soraya’s name. I don’t even know what she did. I mean she saved Lara’s life, how do you get pissed off at a person for that? “Uhm, she cleaned up the hotel with Leda and Kwesi, and they’re getting us a safe house instead. The girl needs to rest after fighting that guy off of you but she doesn’t want to stay still.”

“I can wait. The two of us need to have a _talk_.”

“And what the hell did she do?”

Both of us look at Amanda. She gestures with her hands, palms up. “You sound like you want to rip her a new asshole. I don’t think she’s done anything to deserve that.”

I squint my eyes at Amanda. Was she implying that Lara was the one deserving of being ripped a new asshole?

Lara shakes her head. “No, I just had some thoughts that I want to run by her, that’s all.”

Lara’s lying. Like it’s usually hard to tell, but she’s not even really trying. Something’s up and I hope she tells me. I chew my lip. “Lets get you out of here then we can meet back up with everyone and figure out what we’re doing next.”

“I already know what we’re doing next.” 

Reyes rolls her eyes. “Oh here we go.”

“I can’t explain this,” Lara says, ignoring Reyes and focusing on Amanda and me. “But we need to go to China. There’s something there that my parents hid from Shaw.”

“Yeah, lets go to China. Then we can comb through nine million square kilometers trying to find something that you don’t even know what it is.” Amanda is kinda blunt but she’s also kind of right so I have to give her a point for that.

Lara just shakes her head. “I don’t expect you to believe me, but I need you to trust me. And we don’t have to explore the _entire_ country. We just have to search the Tomb of the first Qin Emperor.”

My wife says that like that’s going to be easy. I’m not even sure what that is, but it sounds familiar. And it’s still probably like going through a needle in a haystack. I don’t even know why she’s suddenly thinking of this. “Lara… what’s going on?”

"The Terracotta Warriors," Amanda says. She walks closer to the bed and leans against it. "Thousands and thousands of clay soldiers, chariots and horses buried in and near Emperor Qin Shi Huang's necropolis."

Reyes holds up her hand. “Okay, first. Necropolis gives me a bad feeling. Second, how the hell do you know your parents hid anything there?”

Smiling wanly, Lara looks down at her fingers. “Just something I overheard my parents talk about once. While I was out, I dreamed of them, and remembered that conversation. It seems like a good lead, and we’re out of others right now. I’d like to bring the fight to Shaw. This might be a good first step.”

“If that’s what your instincts tell you, little bird, I support it.” Jonah starts handing out food to everyone, then leans in to give Lara a hug. She smiles gratefully at him. 

I take Lara’s hands and thread our fingers together. “Say we find something there, what then?”

“We go back to Tibet.”

That isn’t what I actually expected to hear. I knew we’d have to travel all over the world, but China and Tibet hadn’t even been on my radar. I was expecting a place like Singapore or Australia first. Or like a rerun of Peru. I should have realized that she’d be mulling over Tibet. Probably has been this whole time. There’s that girl there. I hadn’t told Lara at the time but they kinda have the same nose. And we’d never figured out the thing with the wolf figurine. It was like a gift from beyond the grave.

Tibet. “Okay so I’m gonna need to pack warmly.”

Lara smiles at me. I could argue, like it looks like Amanda is about to do, but I’m going to support her because Lara hasn’t been wrong yet and if Jonah thinks she’s on to something, she has to be on to something. 

“China I get. It makes a twisted sort of sense that the Terracotta Army is related somehow. For all we know they’re so well preserved _because_ of whatever… powers the relics. Which means we need to figure out how to prevent what happened to the Hanging Gardens...” Amanda had stood at some point, but now she sits back down and rubs her knees with her palms. “But what’s so important about Tibet?”

“We spent a few days there on the way back from our honeymoon. I met a girl. She looked like she’s eleven or twelve, but--”

I have to interrupt. “She’s actually like fourteen, Lara.”

“How do you know?”

“I asked.” 

Lara looks surprised. “I guess I ...never thought to ask. It makes sense, if she was old enough to remember my father, she couldn’t have been as young as I thought she was.”

_Or maybe you didn’t want to think about it._ “Anyway, keep going sweetie.”

“This girl, Dolma. She had a figurine. I think it’s a minor artifact. It didn’t seem like anything special but there is definitely power to it. It was given to her mother by my father. And my parents disappeared in the Himalayas. And I have reason to believe.” Lara exhales, suddenly, closing her eyes and whispering. “Shaw murdered them there.”

The hospital room is silent. Jonah sits next to Amanda but she leans away from him a little. He doesn’t press it and lets her have her space. That’s a hell of an accusation and I don’t know how to respond to it.

Doctor Hussain comes in, though, before we can question Lara further. The doctor has a red headscarf or hijab with a floral pattern to it. It’s _really_ cute. She checks Lara out, poking and prodding and doing all the things that doctors are supposed to do. Lara just sits there and takes it without complaints, though she’s got a slightly grumpy expression on her face. I take a picture and she just gets grumpier.

The doctor eventually gives Lara the all clear. She’s a little puzzled. “You look fine. I’m still concerned that you were unconscious for as long as you were. You’re very lucky there wasn’t any permanent damage.”

Lara gratefully retreats with her clothing into the bathroom, and I turn back to the doctor. “Thank you so much, Dr. Hussain. I’m glad I don’t have to apologize for her being a terrible patient!”

Dr. Hussain smiles. “She did all the work. But if you’d keep an eye on her? As I said everything checked out fine but in cases like this, sometimes something could show up a little later. I know how stubborn some patients can be and your wife seems like she’s _extra_ stubborn.” She’s the kind of person who exclaims with her hands a lot, and when she says ‘extra stubborn’ she waggles her pointer finger at me.

“I’ll call you if I have any questions or she starts to act weird.” I decide that the best part about living in England is listening to cute British doctors and archaeologists talk.

Amanda chimes in. “Weirder than usual, you mean?” 

“Do you think she’d be a danger to anyone?” Reyes asks, voice hushed.

“I doubt it. She was really lucky someone was there to give her CPR so quickly.”

“I can hear you in there, you know.” Lara pushes the door open, shooting a sour look at the four of us. I can’t help but feel a little sheepish. Like we’d been caught talking behind her back. And we kind of had. But it was for a good cause.

“I’m fine.” Lara holds out her hand. Dr. Hussain takes it. “But thank you.”

“Call me. I mean it.” She lets go of Lara’s hand and hurries off, probably to whatever other patient that wants to give her a hard time. Poor woman looks perpetually rushed.

“Remind me to make them take me here if I ever get hurt again,” I say. 

Lara elbows me. “If you’re trying to make me jealous it’s not working.”

“If I was trying to make you jealous I’d make out with blondie here.”

If Amanda had been drinking something we would have had a genuine spit take. As it is she makes a choking sound. The glare she gives me is worth it and the look on Lara’s face is about as priceless.

Since Soraya hasn’t called us about the safe house yet, we squeeze into a taxi back to the mansion. With me in Lara’s lap and Amanda in Jonah’s, we even managed to fit! I rest my head on Lara’s shoulder. Amanda seems to nap on Jonah’s. Sometimes I think she’s descended from a harpy but after this morning I feel less annoyed at her. And right now her guard is down. I’m gonna call that a major victory.

The mansion is still kind of wrecked. Winston has managed to clean up the worse of it and there are new security bars on the broken windows. He greets us with soup and news that Soraya has set up a safe house in Germany, once again proving that he’s secretly Jesus.

“She’s already there?” Lara frowns and her shoulder tenses under my hand. “I need to talk to her, but it’s something that needs to be said in _person_.”

It’s like there’s this quiet rage building inside of her. I can see it clear as day and it’s scary as fuck. What did Soraya do? I follow Lara into the study. It looks even worse than the rest of the mansion, but the vault door is still sealed and Lara had moved all of her and our important documents behind that door months ago. “Sweetie, tell me what’s wrong? You really do sound like you want to rip Raya a new asshole.”

“I’m not going to rip her a new anything. Not literally, anyway.” Lara unlocks the door and heads inside. I follow her and close it behind me.

“Okay, it’s just you and me and no one is gonna hear through the door. _Talk_ to me!” I fold my arms and give her my most stubborn, most adorable pout.

She looks at me, then groans and looks away. “Fuck me, It’s not fair when you do that.” Lara sinks onto an old stool. The vault is filled with artifacts, relics and papers, and the walls are covered with photographs, maps and more old documents. The chair is probably as old as Lara is. “The last thing I remember was drowning. And then I was standing in the snow, following a group of people. My parents were there,Sam. _Roth_ was there. Soraya and Grimm, too. And Shaw. They were in the Himalayas and they were searching for something. Another skull it turns out. This one can’t be moved, I think. It looked fused to a throne.”

I get on my knees in front of Lara, and rest my hands on her knees. “That’s totally not crazy, Lara. Remember, I had a goddess in my head and now she’s in a sword? Which I’m taking with me and I don’t want to hear an argument. What happened next?”

Lara’s smile is tight, but she doesn’t argue with me. “I followed them of course. They traveled a long time, until they found a cavern system. It was similar to some of the places we’ve explored. Same warning markings, but also something new. Which reminds me I need to review your footage from Iraq again. And probably Turkey and Thinis.”

She reaches behind her and opens a drawer. Taking out a figurine, she shows it to me. It’s a woman with outstretched wings. I gently take it from her and turn it over in my hands. “Isn’t this the thing you told me your dad thought was from Atlantis?”

“Yes. I have some theories on that, but it takes a back seat to stopping Shaw.” 

She taps at a circular symbol and I straighten. “Lara, I’ve seen that symbol before.”

“You have? I thought we might have recorded it from our other expeditions but I don’t really remember. I definitely think I saw it at the Hanging Gardens.”

Shaking my head, I put my finger to her lips. “In a dream, Lara. I saw it in a dream. There were all these...well it was a city and a parade or something. But I definitely saw that symbol! I think it was on the people in the parade.”

“Something Himiko was trying to tell you?” Lara mulls that over. “This figurine isn’t like the others. It’s marked with runes and letters from several languages, but some of them make no sense and I’m pretty sure that they were all added at different times. I thought that maybe it was one sentence strung together from several languages, but none of it makes sense.”

Lara puts the statue back where she found it, and leans down until her face is in my hair. “Either we’re both going mad, or we’re seeing things that have happened before.”

“What happened with your parents?” I tilt my head back and bring a hand to her face. “What else did you see? You can tell me, Lara. I’m here for you. Got it?”

She sighs, the slow shaky kind that means whatever she’s going to say is going to hurt her. “I watched them die. My mother got swarmed by those shadow bastards and Shaw shot my father in the back.”

“Jesus. You say that a lot more calmly then I would have.” And I didn’t even get along with my dad.

“I’d rather not lose it right now.” Lara smiles, but there’s no emotion in her expression. “That’s why I want to talk to Soraya.”

“...because she was there. Oh my god _Roth_ was there? But he said they didn’t know what happened to them!” Roth had lied to her all these years? I can’t believe it. I just can’t. It doesn’t make any sense. I’m pissed off on her behalf.

“He probably didn’t think I was ready yet. I like to think he would have told me once we got off Yamatai…” Lara sounds regretful, but her tone goes cold again. “But Soraya has had _plenty_ of time to come clean.”

“So what are you going to do, yell at her?”

“I am going to calmly and reasonably get an explanation for keeping me in the dark,” Lara says, and she sounds totally calm and reasonable.

Right. “So you’re going to yell at her. Got it. Remind me to keep Leda out of the room when you do that. I don’t know if she’d yell at your or her but we don’t need everyone to be screaming.”

She looks a little distressed. “I’m not going to yell at her, Sam. I promise.”

“Hit her?” I fold my arms and tilt my head at her.

She frowns. “Yes. No. I don’t know. I screamed my throat raw at them in the dream but no one heard me. I don’t know what I’m going to say to her when I confront her. Mostly I want to know why.”

“You deserve to know why.” I slide my arms around her and rest my face on her shoulder. “Lara?”

“Yes?”

“I was so worried about you.”

“I’m sorry.” She turns her face and kisses my hair. 

I don’t think that’s something that we’re ever going to be able to change. I’ll probably be hearing that from her again in the future. But I guess that’s what I have to expect when loving a Croft.


	18. Ghosts

Sam knows me too well. It’s hard to reel back my anger at Soraya. Roth as well but all I can really do with him is scream uselessly at a gravestone. And Grimm would just follow his lead. At least with Soraya I can get some kind of explanation. Maybe some kind of closure, because what I witnessed has only managed to give me more questions. Chief among them is how she and the others escaped. And what happened to my parents’ bodies.

I mull these things over as we load up the Land Rover. The trickiest part is going to be hiding our weapons, but it shouldn’t be too difficult to get everything to Germany and Winston is disturbingly good at this. I’m more reluctant to take the artifacts but I don’t believe they’re safe here. It’s only a matter of time until Shaw makes another attempt on the mansion. I think we may need to hide them in different places. I also think we’ll need at least one of them to save Alisha. And if we have to, we can destroy them.

Reyes approaches me while I’m watching Winston work his magic on the Land Rover. “Lara, what are we gonna do about Alisha? She’s got that… _thing_ still inside her.”

“I know. I haven’t forgotten about it. I have an idea but we need the others to do it.” I lean in. “There’s obviously a ritual that allows the transference of one soul to another. Filling the vessel, like what happened with Sam and Himiko. It has to work the same way with Mehit, but I believe that the one that Shaw has been using is...wrong somehow. Corrupted. It caused Sam a great deal of pain. It _worked_ , but there has to be a way to do it without hurting Alisha.”

A beefy hand squeezes my shoulder, and Jonah pulls me against him. “Little bird, if anyone can figure it out, you can. Like I said, follow your instincts. And let your friends help you.”

I really don’t know what I’d do without him. Without any of them, really. “Thank you. But I can’t do this alone. I’m going to need Amanda’s help with the ritual, and we’ll need everyone, I think.”

Jonah’s face falls. “You might have to do it without me. I got a call from home. My grandmother is sick.”

Jonah’s grandmother is a kind woman with a stubborn streak as deep as the Mariana’s Trench. “You don’t need my permission, but go be with her. I’ll have an easier time knowing you’re safe and taking care of her. She promised me a home cooked meal and I intend to take her up on it.”

He grins, and hugs me tight enough to make my ribs creek. “Just be careful, Lara. You’re family. If you need me, you call. I wish I could stay and help.”

The big man lets me go, and I shoo him off to say goodbye to Sam, Alisha and Amanda. “I almost wish I could send them with him.”

“You’d have to tie Sam to him to get her to go,” Reyes points out. “And Amanda has hitched along for the ride. I’d take Alisha to go with him until everything settles down if we didn’t need to do this...ritual thing.” The mechanic is clearly skeptical. That’s her baby girl. I feel this pang of regret. If Reyes carries through on her word, I won’t get to see Alisha again. 

“I know this is all really hard to grasp. But I _can_ separate Alisha and Mehit. I’ll explain my theory once we’re on the road.” It will give us something to discuss. I don’t really want to tackle the Shaw problem until everyone is reunited again and I’ve had it out with Soraya. But if I think about that anymore I’m just going to stew and that won’t help us.

Winston once again proves his worth. We’re able to secure weapons as well as our collection of powerful artifacts in secret compartments in the cushions and welded to the frame. I hide my father’s notes and journal in one of them.

“Some day you’re going to explain…” I start to say, but Winston shakes his head.

“I’m afraid all of that is in the past, Miss Croft. But I will serve you as I served Lord Croft.” Winston smiles warmly at me as I give him a hug. “However… “ He reaches into his pocket and hands me a faded photograph. “Return this to me when this business with Shaw is complete, and I’ll tell you the story of how I met your father.”

I look at the picture. I recognize my father, but he’s young. Eighteen perhaps. Standing next to him with his arm around him is another young man. They’re both in a Royal Army uniform. He bears an uncanny resemblance to my butler.

When I look up, Winston has disappeared. Likely to call about repairs to the manor. “Hell.”

“Told you.” Sam wraps an arm around me and kisses my cheek. “Winston is Batman.”

“I thought he was Soup Jesus?”

“Well Batman is Jesus too.”

“Right.” I turn and kiss her soundly on the lips. “Ready to go to Germany?”

“Haven’t been there in years. Not since our last backpacking trip before the Island.” She deliberately avoids saying the island’s name. I don’t blame her.

“We won’t be there long. We need to regroup, and then we need to help Alisha.” 

“Do you really know the ritual to transfer souls?”

“No,” I admit. “I have some inklings. It’s functionally similar to what I was researching for Setsuko, but it’s going to be something that Amanda and I play by ear. We’ll need Soraya’s help too, I think. ”

“Then you can’t bite her head off.” Sam’s tone is lightly scolding.

“I’m not going to bite her head off!” I’m probably going to bite her head off. “Well, I just need to… I need _answers_!”

“Sweetie, you’re not going to get answers if you’re going to go in swinging. Believe me I’m all for cheering you on for ass kicking but I think you can get answers without fighting her.”

“Are you worried that I’ll lose?”

She smirks at me. “I never said that. You can kick that old lady’s ass easy.”

“Sam she’s only about ten years older than me.”

“Then you’re getting old.” She laughs and twirls out of my reach.

“You’re older than me!”

“Not any more, Lara. I stopped aging when I turned twenty-three.”

Sam sits in the back with Alisa and Reyes, giving up the coveted front seat for Amanda. She wants to help reassure the girl and if she hadn’t done it herself I probably would have suggested it. The two went through something together that’s hard to fathom if you haven’t seen it yourself, and for all that Reyes has gone through with us, she hasn’t seen what the rest of us have seen. I’m sure it grates on her, but it can’t be helped.

Amanda breaks the silence. “So do you have a plan or are we making this shit up as we go along?”

I glance at her and she quirks her lips at me. Right. “To be blunt, it’s a little of both. We want to separate Mehit from Alisha, without pulling Alisha out of her own body. We need to anchor Mehit to something else, but we can’t let it be a permanent anchor.”

“What if we sealed Mehit back into her statue?”

“That would be easiest but it would be just a matter of time before some other poor soul gets lured in. Or Alisha gets lured back.” I don’t want that, and I’m not entirely sure Mehit wants that either. As long as these artifacts hold powers and souls, Shaw will always seek them out. “And I’m not going to push my problems down to the next generation. I think this is what my parents were trying to do, and I’m going to finish what they started.”

Sam chimes up from the back seat. “What does that mean for my Himiko sword?” 

“It means we’re going to free her, too.”

“Lara, is that _really_ a good idea?” 

I look in the mirror at Reyes. “It’s the best idea, because if she moves on to wherever it is souls go, she won’t be a problem to anyone ever again.”

Sam fidgets, picking at her fingers. “I think maybe she’s ready. Sometimes I got a sense of … lucidity from her. She’s so _tired_. Maybe she finally burned out her anger.”

“That doesn’t make her any more predictable,” I point out. “And we still don’t know if she can control the weather from that sword. When we’re in Germany I want you to see if she can while you’re holding the sword.”

Amanda frowns, discontentedly. “Is that a good idea?”

“I’d rather know sooner, rather than later when we’re actually in trouble. Besides, I trust Sam.” I pull into the train for the Channel Tunnel, and turn off the engine. We’ll be here for a bit, so I turn to face the others while talking. “My theory goes back to this statue we found in Japan. It was a large shrine, too heavy to move, but … well we encountered a ghost, for lack of a better word. A young woman chained to that shrine. It didn’t look related to anything else that we’ve encountered. But if a soul can be chained, that means a soul can be unchained. I’ve done a bit of research here and there, thinking we could go back and free her. And I think my research might have paid off for Alisha.”

I reach behind the seat and pull out a notebook. Amanda takes it and opens it. She starts pouring over the notes. “So is it the transference ritual, or something else?”

“It has the same source, but instead of pouring Mehit from one person to another, or one object to another, we let her go. It won’t destroy her, simply allow her to return to wherever Egyptian deities go.”

“And what happens if we fuck it up?” Amanda pulls out a pencil and starts to sketch diagrams on a blank page. She’s taking some of the my own sketches and modifying them. She’s probably seeing if she can improve upon what I’ve discovered.

“Worse case we direct Mehit back into her statue and figure out how to remove her later.”

“I just feel like we’re missing something.” She taps the pencil against the paper and sighs.

“We probably need some kind of catalyst….”

Amanda and I spend most of the drive through France and Belgium discussing possible ways to initialize the ritual. Shaw has been _forcing_ the souls out, or in. I’ve seen enough evidence to suspect that he’s gone as far as human experimentation. I don’t have any real proof, but I’m almost positive he has at least attempted the ritual on someone before Sam. Whatever happened to that poor soul, I don’t know.

The other thing of concern are the other artifacts, and what happens if we try to do something with them. I already discovered what happens when one of them breaks, I just don’t know if the creature I fought in Shaw’s lab was because of what Shaw did, or if the soul had simply degraded over time. I groan. We’re going to need to set up some kind of safe room for this.

Soraya is supposed to meet us in Frankfurt and guide us to the safehouse. She couldn’t give the exact location over the phone and I doubt it’s actually near the city. The last thing we need is to lead Shaw’s men to us again. Though I’d like a rematch with Giovanna.

I find a place to park near where she said to meet us and wait for Soraya’s signal. Amanda shifts in the passenger seat. The only weapons within easy reach are the pistol under mine and Sam’s sword stuffed under the cushions, so we’re sitting ducks. I doubt Shaw would want some kind of incident in public, though.

Someone raps on the side of the Land Rover. I turn my head in time to see Leda’s face. She’s wearing a motorcycle helmet, and pulls the visor down as soon as she knows I recognize her. The Grecian woman pull out on a motorcycle, and I’m quick to follow.

“God, I love motorcycles,” Sam murmurs. “She looks so good on it. We should get you another one, Lara.”

Alisha perks up for the first time this trip. “You had a motorcycle?”

“Yep! Lara totally had one in Uni. It was kind of cheap and shitty.”

“Sam!” 

“Sorry Lara! Cheap and crappy!”

“That’s not why… nevermind.” I _liked_ that motorcycle. I bought it with some money I’d saved from working the bar. It required some tender love and care but it had ran beautifully. “If I recall you’d been more than happy to ride with me.”

Amanda laughs, and I feel my face start to turn red. “Not like _that_.”

Reyes puts her arm protectively around Alisha in what I assume is a ‘no motorcycles until you’re fifty’ kind of gesture. “So what happened to it?”

“Long story.”

“Isn’t there one in the garage, sweetie?” Sam leans forward, hugging me from behind the seat. 

“That old thing?”

“That old _thing_ is a Black Shadow, Lara.”

“Sam, you actually looked it up?”

My wife laughs. It’s good to hear people laughing right now. I have a feeling we’re not going to get a chance to laugh for much longer. “Wikipedia is a girl’s best friend. Less than two-thousand of ‘those things’ were made! And they’re all handcrafted! That bike is like…” She waves a hand and smacks it against the back of my head. “Seventy years old!”

“Closer to sixty and that’s why it’s staying put in the garage. It was my grandfather’s.”

“A bike that beautiful needs to be _free_ Lara. It needs to ride on the wind and be _free_!” She sits back, head thwacking against her seatrest as she _sighs_ like the freedom of that old Vincent Black Shadow is a matter of the highest order.

As Leda leads us on a merry chase, I think that maybe Sam isn’t entirely wrong. I miss my old bike. Maybe I can take the Shadow on a trip around the grounds when we get back, but after that I’m going to buy myself another bike. One I can work on with my two hands again. Yes. I quite like that idea. I’m under no illusion that I won’t find a reason to get back to digging into the past, but it’ll be a good way to unwind.

Leda leads us out of Frankfurt like I predicted. It’s a twenty minute drive down to Dreieich and we spend another fifteen going through back streets until we pull up to a tiny little flat.

“It looks rustic,” Amanda quips.

“That would be the kind way of saying it.” I pop the door open and climb out. Leda pulls her helmet off and I give her a short hug and a pat on the shoulder. “Where’s your girl?”

“Inside.”

“Can you help the others?” I can feel Sam’s eyes on me, and I’m sure they’re disapproving. “I need Soraya for a few minutes.”

I leave the others and head inside. It’s less cramped than it looks from the outside, but the kitchen is smaller than the one in our old flat and the living room isn’t much bigger than the kitchen. There are two bedrooms, so I think we’ll all be getting cozy together for a few days while we plan our trip to China. Soraya is bent over the fridge, stocking it with some takeout.

She straightens and comes over to me. “Lara, I was so glad to hear that you were awake.” Soraya nudges my shoulder with her fist. “No fair taking a nap on us like that.”

I’m suddenly torn between being angry and just letting it go. I’d been so prepared to unleash everything on her but now that I see her and remember how much she’s helped us, my anger starts to waver. I sag against the counter and ask, “Soraya, what really happened to my parents?”

The Lebanese woman looks taken aback, and her hazel eyes narrow slightly. “Is this _really_ the time?”

“It’s as good as any.” If she wants a fight about it I’m more than willing to give it to her.

“What did you see?”

“Excuse me?”

Soraya steps closer, until she’s looking down at me. “You do not come in asking questions like that at a time like this if something didn’t happen to prompt it. So what did you see?” She puts a hand on my shoulder and my anger suddenly turns to so much smoke.

My voice shakes, I _hate_ that it shakes, but I’m back there in that cave or temple helpless as I watch my parents die. “Why didn’t you tell me you were _there_? Why did Roth _lie_ to me? About Tibet, about that expedition?”

Soraya’s face twists up. Regret, sadness, and pain. “You were just a kid, how do you explain to a twelve-year old what happened in Tibet? I’m sure Roth would have told you after Yamatai. We had planned to go there next.”

Of course they had. “Soraya, we’ve known each other over a year now. After Egypt you could have told me _any_ time. I’m a twenty-five year old woman, I can _take_ it.”

She leans on the counter, then slides up it and sits. Her voice is measured and even, but that doesn’t disguise how shaken she is. “I’m sorry. I thought ...maybe after we dealt with Shaw. Or maybe I kept pushing it off because I didn’t want to face it myself. I owe you a lot of stories anyway. How did you find out?”

I’m not going to let myself feel bad. I had a _right_ to know. “While I was in hospital, I dreamed. Like I was there. A vision or something. Shaw was there too, and he turned on everyone when the puppets attacked. I saw everything, right up until my father went down.”

Soraya mutters something in Lebanese. It roughly translates to ‘fuck my life’ and is the final proof I needed that what I’d seen was true. She turns her head back towards me. “I’m surprised you didn’t come in swinging.”

“I thought about it, but my anger burned out. Now I’m just…” I shake my head. “I don’t fucking know. I still kind of want to.”

“Do you want to know what happened after? How Roth, Grimm and I escaped?”

The others are starting to come in. “Tell me later tonight. After everyone is asleep.”

“Okay.” Soraya hops off the counter and hurries past me. “Make yourselves at home. I’m going to make a check of the perimeter.”

I wonder at the memories I’ve brought up as she disappears out the door. She must have seen much worse, the past twelve years. But I’m sure your first horrific experience is the one that sticks with you.


	19. Hard Choices

Soraya edges past me as I walk into the apartment. She doesn’t _look_ bruised and her expression is inscrutable, so I think there might have been more talking and less hitting. That’s a good thing. I love it when Lara gets all grwararar and she’s totally within her right to be all grwararar with Soraya but we kind of all need to get along.

Lara has her arms folded and she’s leaning against the counter in the kitchen. I edge up next to her, fold my own arms and lean against the counter, mimicking her pose. The left corner of her lip twitches slightly and I bite back my own smirk, before putting Lara’s expression on my own face. “So how’d it go?”

She sounds defensive. “I really did see it. It wasn’t just some mad dream concocted by my being oxygen starved. I think it went well. I could have chewed her out but I couldn’t find the point to. I don’t think I would have done any different in her place, honestly.”

“Push it off and push it off until you’ve pushed it off so much you don’t know how to bring it up anymore?”

Lara nodded, sighing heavily. “Exactly.”

“I’m not sure how I feel about us having weird visions.” Like what if Lara seeing that vision is kind of like it’s predicting something that’ll happen to us? What if someone shoots us in the back? I glance into the living room. I can’t imagine Leda or Soraya being traitors, and Amanda has wormed her way in. She’s as much against Shaw as the rest of us and I trust her.

Lara catches the direction my eyes go in. “We don’t have the same kind of tension Shaw had with my father. They’re not going to turn on us.”

“I’m not thinking they will, but … god this whole thing freaks me out.” I try to keep my voice down. I really don’t want Reyes to hear me. “Are you really sure we can help Alisha? I feel like it’s my fault. Like I could have done something to protect her. Like I should have. I had undead goddess queen in my head for so long I should have understood the...the _allure_ of that power.” I smack a hand over my face. “And I encouraged her by showing her how to pick locks I’m an idiot!”

“Teaching a teenager how to pick locks might be a lapse in judgement but that doesn’t make you an _idiot_ , Sam.” She drops her arms out of their folded position and I take that as an excuse to twist into her and lean my head on her shoulder.

“What if we can’t fix this?”

“We’ll fix it.”

The certainty in her voice makes me feel better. And if we can fix Alisha we can help Sestuko pass on to the other side. More than ever I believe that’s a real place. Maybe it’s not like they say it is in the bible and other places, but I believe there’s something there. Despite all the evil that Himiko has done, I kind of hope there’s a place for her too. But I know how she felt, I know that like any other person there was a human being there once. I’m suddenly scared I’ve gotten too close. Too close to Himiko. 

“Lara?”

“Yes?”

“Is it wrong that I can emphasize with Himiko?”

She kisses the top of my head, and her hand is warm and comforting on my shoulder. “It just means you’re a good person.”

“And here I thought I’d never amount to anything.” I slip out of her grip and beeline for the fridge. “Okay people! Who’s hungry! Because I’m _starving_ and you better get some before I eat all of it!”

Leda walks in, and whispers to Lara. “How does she maintain that figure with that appetite?”

“A great deal of exercise,” Lara replies.

I smirk at them over my shoulder. “She means I work it off on her.”

“Sam!” Lara’s face turns bright red. It’s so cute.

“There’s going to be no working off anything with anyone,” Amanda complains. The blonde woman comes in and smacks me in the arm. “There’s seven of us, two beds, and a couch. I’m _not_ that friendly with any of you.”

I wait until she’s leaning into the fridge before I say, “Too bad. I’m sure you could squeeze into bed with me and Lara.” 

Her head thunks inside the fridge and she gives me the dirtiest look I’ve ever seen. It only gets more sour when I grin back at her. “Careful,” she says. Her tone grows somber and dark. “I might take you up on that offer.”

Amanda vanishes back into the living area, claiming part of the couch for herself by curling up on one end with her legs tucked underneath her. I wasn’t expecting that response. Damn it, she _wins_.

“Were you just flirting with her?”

“Do I detect a note of jealousy, Lara?”

“ _Yes._ ”

I lean up and kiss her. “I don’t mean anything by it. You know how I get with my friends.”

“Yes, I know how you get with your friends. Amanda is not as touchy as you are, and you should respect her personal space.”

Lara’s lecturing me. And she’s kind of right. Kind of. Maybe. A little. “I just want her to relax enough to let us in. There’s nothing wrong with that. Besides, it’s better than us arguing all the time.” A thought occurs to me and my stomach drops out from under me. “... Lara...were you really _upset_ at me? When we were getting to know each other and I was so clingy.” That would be like my greatest fear before Yamatai. That I somehow bothered Lara or pushed her or something.

“I was confused, but I wasn’t really that irritated. I thought I’d hate it, but I didn’t. I think I was so lonely at the time that you being so openly affectionate didn’t turn me off.”

She knows she made the wrong choice of words immediately, because she puts her hand over my mouth. I feel a lot better, though I have the perfect come-back to that one. But I’ll spare her for now. “When you were really not feeling touchy you told me so.”

“So let Amanda set her boundaries and she’ll let you in if she wants to.”

I feel like Amanda is already letting Lara in. And she kind of let me in a bit when we were at the hospital. Like I should be jealous, but I’m not. It’s great that we’re building up new friendships. We got so closed in with each other after the Endurance sank that we could have ended up really isolated. I don’t talk to most of my old friends anymore. Alex...well he died, and most of my friends from UCL don’t talk to me anymore. “Old wise sage Lara Croft.”

“If you keep calling me old you’re going to _walk_ back to the manor.”

Soraya ended up not only checking out the perimeter, but also brought back a chair and a couple of crates. Reyes claims the chair, and the couch gets taken up by Amanda, Leda, Alisha and Soraya. It’s a really cramped couch but Alisha acts so much like a buffer between Amanda and the others that I think she did that on purpose. That leaves a crate for Lara and I just camp on the ground in front of her. I notice that someone is missing. “Where’s Kwesi?”

With a spoon still in her mouth, Soraya answers. “Securing us a plane. We thought it would be better to have something we can control. More leeway in where we go and when we do it.”

So that will make eight people trying to sleep in this place. I hope it’s a big enough plane or we’re going to be getting _really_ close.

I can see Amanda’s eyes roll into the back of her head as she does the same math I just did. “You couldn’t have found a place with an extra bedroom? Or some cots.

“It’s the best I can do on short notice. You’re going to have to get comfortable with someone or find a place on the floor.”

“We’ll take the floor.” I tilt my head back and look up at Lara. She smiles down at me, then looks back at Amanda. “You can share a bed with Alisha. Reyes can take the couch, and Kwesi can sleep on the floor too. That leaves the second bed for Leda and Soraya. Fair?”

“Oh, how _chivalrous_ of you.”

Lara rubs her nose. “You could sleep in the _car_ if that’s how you want to be.”

Amanda throws her empty container at us and I laugh as Lara ducks.

Leda shakes her head at us. “Children! That settles it.” She’s quick on the draw, and I think she just wants to avoid any more potential arguing. Plus she gets to sleep in a bed. 

I’ve slept on the ground enough when backpacking with Lara that it’s not really a problem. Oh I _complained_ enough, but I’m not going to here. Not with both Soraya and Amanda in the room. Or Leda. I really like Leda and I don’t want her upset with me either.

We finish our meal in relative peace. Lara gets up to throw her container in the trash, and heads outside. She returns with a couple duffel bags. I recognize one of them as the one she’d stuffed the statue of Mehit in. She gestures for Amanda and the two walk into one of the bedrooms. 

While they plan whatever ritual we’re going to do, I take a seat next to Alisha. The girl has moved to the kitchen on a stool, hugging her legs. “Hey. You doing okay?”

“Yeah. I guess.” She looks exhausted. I don’t think she’s gotten any rest even when she tries to sleep. 

“And...you know who?”

Alisha lifts her head. Her eyes have an eerie golden glow. “I think she’s winning.”

“If you’re still here, then you’re doing really good, Alisha. Don’t give up. Not many people would be resisting her this long.”

“I keep thinking that if I give up, I won’t get to see Roth...my dad again. I can’t believe he was there this whole time and I didn’t even _know_ it.”

I look back towards the couch. “Yeah, well adults have this notion that kids can’t handle much, even when they can.”

“I want to be mad at Lara. Cuz she got all the dad time with him. But he didn’t know and…” She hugs her legs tighter. “Do you think he would have...cared?”

“Oh, yeah, he would have! But I think it wasn’t as much like..your mom trying to protect you. And more your mom not knowing how to tell him.”

“Think he knew?”

It’s a good question. “I don’t think he did. He would have confronted Reyes about it if he’d suspected. Or maybe tried to get closer...do stuff with you. Until she was willing to confirm it.”

She smiled, and there’s water in her eyes. They’re still glowing, but fainter now. “He took me fishing once. A few months before you guys went to Japan.”

“He did?”

“Yeah, you guys were on a weekend trip in the alps and he offered to take me so my mom could do a job.”

Well, Roth wasn’t stupid. Maybe he did suspect something. “Huh. Did you have a good time?”

Alisha shrugged, in that sort of way that teenagers do when they didn’t want to say they have the good time they actually did have. “I guess. I caught this big bass and he made me _clean _it.” She scrunches up her face. “It was gross.”__

__That’s Roth-love for you. “Something you’d have had to get used to around him. I mean he turned Lara into a survivalist. And it kind of saved us. He gave Lara the tools she needed to survive and save us.”_ _

__“Don’t tell my mom, but I kind of want to do that stuff. What my dad did. What Lara does. Explore.” She gets this stubborn set to her jaw. It _really_ reminds me of Roth. Between that stubborn old ass and her mom’s stubborn streak..._ _

__And oh god, Reyes would explode if she knew. “How about this. Assuming your mom doesn’t kill us, next time we do a good old fashioned dig that has no shooting or magical artifacts, we’ll take you along.”_ _

__“Really?”_ _

__“Yes! I know Lara would love the idea. I mean she’s practically your big sis!” I think maybe between the three of us we can convince Reyes to not be a tight-ass. Alisha is like almost sixteen and she’s at that age where she’s going to start rebelling. She already is. And maybe we can direct that rebellion into a productive direction. God, I sound old. I can’t imagine myself as a parent. Considering who raised me. I’d just ruin a kid._ _

__We chat for awhile longer. Lara pokes her head out long enough to ask Soraya to join her. I hope if they have any questions about _actually being possessed_ they come and ask _me_. Hello. I kind of have first person experience in that! Alisha too. We make some plans. Alisha is going to look up places that seem relatively safe, and then we’ll double team her mom._ _

__It doesn’t take the archaeological team long to come out after that. They shuffle around the living area to make a space and Soraya draws a circle big enough for a teenager to sit in. It looks familiar, but I can’t place just where I’ve seen it. I don’t think it’s one of Himiko’s memories either. I glance over where the sword rests against the wall but she isn’t stirring. That is a relief._ _

__The scary thing is I kind of miss her. I still feel like part of me is missing. Which is crazy, right? Himiko was never _part_ of me. But I still feel that way. Like whatever spot she’d occupied in my soul is lost forever and the only way to feel whole again is to reclaim the Sun Queen._ _

__My fingers itch a little. I can imagine the way the sword feels in my hand, and how I’d be able to feel whole again if I just touch it. I fucking hate her but I still _need_ her and I don’t know what to do about it._ _

__The Lioness statue is placed on one part of the circle and Alisha sits crosslegged in the center. I inch into the living area, until I’m near the sword again. I lean against the wall and grasp the hilt with one hand. Himiko wakes. It feels like the ocean battering against the cliffs, the way she surges. Then she calms. A lump forms in my throat, because I _don’t_ feel whole. When the Sun Queen forced her way into me, she’d pushed something out. With her gone, all that remains is a hollow place in my heart. If our bodies are vessels there’s only so much they can hold at once before something spills out. _ _

__I look at Alisha’s face, and the fear in her eyes. She’s stubborn, and trying to act brave, but she must be so scared. I should warn her, but I don’t know how and I don’t want Reyes to panic. I’ll have to pull her aside and talk to her about it in private._ _

__“Tie my hands.”_ _

__Everyone stops what they’re doing to look at the teenager in the circle. She says again, more insistent. “Tie me up! “_ _

__“Baby, I don’t think we need to do that.” Reyes crouches in front of her daughter, just outside the circle. “Everything’s gonna be fine.”_ _

__“If she says to tie her up, we need to tie her up.” I put all the firmness I can into my voice. Now everyone is looking at me. “Think about it. She’s got a Goddess inside her. She can change _shape_. And we’re probably about to do something that’ll hurt Mehit do we really want a lion rampaging around in this tiny apartment?”_ _

__“You could always just _shoot_ me,” Alisha says, and Lara silently secures her hands behind her back. _ _

__Straightening, my wife takes my hand and leads me over to the circle. “You stand here. Amanda, you take the west. Soraya will take the south, and I’ll take the north.”_ _

__She sets the sword down against the wall behind me, and moves into the north position of the circle._ _

__“So I’m on the east because I’m Japanese?”_ _

__Amanda shrugs, standing across from me. “The sun rises in the east. You’re the heir to and vessel of the Sun Queen. It’s fitting.”_ _

__“Well. I _am_ royalty.”_ _

__Soraya takes her place and looks around the circle. “Are we holding hands and singing songs?”_ _

__“If I ever do that,” Amanda warns. “It means _I’m_ possessed.”_ _

__The door opens and Kwesi ducks into the apartment. He smiles at everyone. “I am sure that your voice is lovely. I see that I am just in time for the kumbaya.”_ _

__Alisha giggles, ducking her head. Oh. _Oh_. Well when the man has a smile like _that_ it’s hard not to crush on him. _ _

__“What now?” Reyes looks as nervous as I’ve ever seen her and she didn’t even catch that so she’s _totally_ out of it. She even lets Leda put an arm around her, and the two are joined on the couch by the big captain. “Do you chant something?”_ _

__“I don’t think chanting is required, but we do need something to start the process.” Lara pulls out her switchblade, and before I realize what she’s doing she’s pricked her thumb and is squeezing blood into the circle. “Blood has long been considered synonymous with life. It flows through us like a river, and like a river it brings that life wherever it goes.”_ _

__She wipes the blade on her shirt, then hands it to Amanda. Soraya has already cut her finger, and Amanda pricks her thumb._ _

__“Guys how many movies have we seen where this kind of thing ends _badly_?! Maybe some knowledge should remain _lost_ ”_ _

__Amanda holds the knife to me, hilt first. “The ritual is neither good nor evil. It’s all in the intent of those doing it. With Shaw, his intent isn’t good and that corrupts everything. Trust us, Samantha.”_ _

__I take it. “If I don’t get a cute bandaid out of this, I’m calling shenanigans.” If we can do this right, maybe we can drain the rest of the artifacts. Lose that knowledge forever. I glance into Lara’s eyes and know she’s thinking the same thing. And I know it just has to grate at her. I don’t really want to do this. I’m allergic to pain. I’m a pansy. But if Lara can cross an island with a hole in her stomach I can prick my finger. Bracing myself, I bite the tip of the knife into my finger._ _

__Suddenly, I’m looking down a long tunnel and the world is spinning around me. Alisha is still sitting in front of me, but she’s changed. First she’s a woman with a lion’s head, then she’s a full bodied lioness, roaring her rage and impotence. But it’s not Lara standing in front of her. There’s a woman with her wings outstretched, her skin marked with arcane patterns and runes. And they’re _fighting_. We’re in a temple. Mehit shifts from lion to woman and back again, lashing out with claws and swords and her bare fists. The woman takes flight. The first flap of her wings sends the Lion Goddess spiraling into a pillar. _ _

__She pushes herself up, shaking her whole body, she runs, charging towards her enemy and leaps. The winged woman screams, a sound like the depths of hell opening up. Mehit has drawn blood, her claws and teeth shredding at one wing. The two hit the ground together and roll apart. I don’t know how this fits into the story that Lara had told us about Mehit. How she’d been captured by the hunter and then become a protector goddess of that holy place. There was nothing about a winged demon-woman._ _

__I realize I’m standing in Thinis just as the two warriors meet again. Ebony skin crashes against bronze, but only one remains standing. The woman folds her wings against her back, and drags Mehit’s unconscious form towards an altar. A familiar statue rests on a stone slab. My eyes blink, and I’m looking down at the statue. I place my right hand on the figurine, and lift the lion Goddess by her head with my left. I hear my voice chanting and I watch the flow of life from Goddess to statue._ _

__I’m flying down the tunnel again and when the world snaps back to normal I’m back in the apartment. Lara’s hand is pressed to her cheek, blood pooling around her fingers. Amanda is laying on the ground, her left bicep sliced up. The couch is upended and Alisha is hugging her mother. Soraya looks like she has a bite wound on her neck. The statue lays shattered inside the circle. Poor Kwesi looks like he’s been mauled, but he seems okay. Mostly._ _

__“Uh.”_ _

__Lara starts, then rushes across the circle to me. “Oh thank god!”_ _


	20. Taking Flight

The knife falls from Sam’s hand after she cuts herself, and then she spasms and her eyes roll back as she goes limp like a rag doll. She doesn’t fall over, just stands there, but I don’t have time to do anything. Alisha is having a seizure. She shifts her head into that of a lioness and snaps the tie I used on her wrists in half. She leaps for me and her nails rake across my face like claws. Soraya jumps forward, grabbing her. Now a lion, the girl contorts in Soraya’s arms and bites her on the shoulder. Amanda tries to pull her off and gets clawed before Kwesi barrels in and locks her into place.

I rush forward to help. “Get her back into the circle!”

It takes a miracle of strength, but the lion-girl gets wrestled back into the circle. I smear blood on the artifact in the shape of the symbol that is supposed to set Mehit free. Alisha screams. It’s this gut wrenching sound. Her face contorts between her own and Mehit’s, and then as suddenly as everything began, the statue shatters and she falls silent.

The captain loosens his grip. Alisha sniffles and hugs him for a few short seconds before Reyes has swept her up into her arms. It can’t have lasted more than a minute. It feels longer. It feels like it all took ten seconds.

“Uh.” Sam’s voice startles me, and I have her in my arms before I even realize that I’ve moved. 

“Oh thank god. Sam, what happened?”

“I don’t know, I was like...somewhere else. Back in Egypt in that temple. I saw Mehit. Like she used to be. I saw her lose a fight. Is Alisha okay?”

“I’m fine...god it feels so weird.” Alisha still can’t get her mom peeled off of her. Sam shares a look with her. They’ve both been through this, and I know Sam will help her through it. 

Sam touches my face. It stings, and she makes an exasperated sound. “Okay, so you all got your butts kicked by a teenager.”

“A teenage _lion _,” Soraya corrects. She has the first aide kit, but Leda makes her sit down.__

__“And I think most of you are going to need stitches.” Leda points at me. “You’re after Amanda.”_ _

__Kwesi peels off his shirt. He has slashes across his chest. Nothing too deep and I don’t think he needs stitches. He winks at me. “I have gained so many new memories with you ladies, I will have so many to tell.”_ _

__Every scar is a memory. That, I understand. “I’d call them good memories. Some of them at least.” I smile, and it hurts my cheek. I’m reminded of what Mehit did to us. Leda is a very good nurse, though, and she has Soraya stitched up quickly._ _

__Amanda’s cuts looks deeper than mine. She’s lucky Alisha hasn’t nicked an artery. There’s three deep gashes along her bicep that match the ones on my face and Kwesi’s chest. She studies her hands as Leda works. “Did you actually go to medical school or is this something you picked up?”_ _

__“That one.” She jerked her head towards her girlfriend. “Gets into many messes and scrapes. I took online classes so that people ask fewer questions when she comes home injured.”_ _

__“She did surgery on my leg once.”_ _

__“Only because you refused to go to the hospital!” Leda snaps. She glares at Soraya cooly, then returns her eyes to Amanda’s wound. “I love that woman but she can be stupid sometimes.”_ _

__Sam stands next to me and takes my hand. “She fits right in with Lara.”_ _

__“I think that’s all of us,” Amanda says. She gets up once Leda has wrapped her arm. “Or anyone who follows Lara anywhere.”_ _

__The brunette turns to me and fixes me with a steely glare. Sam shoves me in her direction and I sit on the couch while she flushes the cuts on my cheek. “You’re lucky they aren’t any deeper.”_ _

__“Will she scar?” Sam kneels in front of me. She knows me so well. I’d say I’m not vain but there are some things that I can be a little shallow about._ _

__“She can tell your grandkids how she fought off a lion when they ask about it,” Leda promises. “Don’t talk, keep your mouth still while I stitch.”_ _

__Sam goes deathly quiet, and I don’t really have anything to add. I don’t want to object, but I don’t really want to have any conversations about children right now. Leda doesn’t want me talking anyway, and I’m really grateful I have an excuse. I can feel the weight of Sam’s eyes on me and I have to wonder what she’s thinking._ _

__People have a way of getting hurt around me, though. My eyes slide to Reyes. I expect a quip about the survival rate around me but she just gives me a glance and I think an attempt at a smile before returning her attention to Alisha. For her part, the girl looks like she just wants to curl up and sleep. “Alisha, why don’t you turn in for the night. You’ve been through a lot and you’ll feel better in the morning.”_ _

__“Lara, stop talking!”_ _

__She nods and slips away from Reyes. Once she’s gone into a bedroom, I turn back to the others. “I think we need a day or two to recover. Obviously, it’s not safe to purge the artifacts here, but we need to take care of that before we fly to China. Some kinds of knowledge should _remain_ lost.” _ _

__“Lara! Sit still.”_ _

__I let Leda finish her work, and she puts the kit away, muttering the whole time about no one ever sitting still. My cheek still hurts and feels stiff, but I refuse anything stronger than advil._ _

__Amanda speaks up. “Joslin, I think you should take Alisha to visit Jonah and his grandmother. Alisha would be safe there, and we shouldn’t drag her further into danger if we can help it.”_ _

__Amanda, I could _kiss_ you. “That’s a _great_ idea. Jonah could use someone around, and I think his grandmother wouldn’t mind the extra company.” And it would keep both Alisha and Reyes safe if something goes wrong._ _

__“Kicking me to the curb. I see how it is.” Reyes nods her head. “But I need to get her away from you guys before something else crazy happens. Especially if you’re going to fuck around with those artifacts.”_ _

__“I’ll arrange a flight for you,” I tell her. “First class for your trouble.”_ _

__She points at me as she gets up. “ _Better_ be first class for all this.”_ _

__We watch her go and join Alisha. Amanda shakes her head. “How has that woman _not_ killed you by now?”_ _

__“That’s a very good question to which I simply don’t have an answer to.”_ _

__There’s an awkward silence before Sam gets up claps her hands together. “Okay, so Cap, what kind of ride did you get us?”_ _

__The Captain rubs the back of his neck, doing a great impression of a sheep. “Well, I am afraid that it will not be first class like Ms. Reyes and Ms. Alisha will be getting. But I can fly you anywhere you want in it.”_ _

__Sam deposits herself in his lap. “A pilot and a ship’s captain, what other sorts of skills are you hiding from us? Don’t be shy!”_ _

__“I can cook! I took lessons in France for a few years.”_ _

__It’s late when we all finally retire. I decide to ask Soraya about how she and the others escaped in Tibet tomorrow. Amanda lets Kwesi take the couch since no one wants to disturb Reyes and Alisha. Leda pulls Soraya into the other bedroom to dote over her, and I settle down with Sam in one corner of the living area with a pile of blankets. Amanda looks so alone against the other wall. I whisper, "Amanda. Come over here. There's room."_ _

__She gives me a condescending look. It's not like she has to crawl into the blankets with us, she has our own, but I want her to feel as though she is welcome._ _

__Sam falls asleep with her face plastered against my chest. I’ve just about drifted off when I hear a shuffling sound. I open one eye. Amanda is scooting a little closer to us._ _

__My sleep is dreamless. After so many visions between myself and Sam, I’ve come to be wary of dreams, so I’m rather relieved. Save a crick in my neck, I feel rested. We shifted in the night. It got colder, so I ended up smushing Sam against the wall from seeking out her body heat. She’s still laying like a very cute log next to me, but I’m sure I won’t hear the end of it.._ _

__Amanda is a foot away, curled up into a ball and buried under a blanket. I _really_ have to pee but she blocks my escape route. I carefully push my blanket off, and crawl over Amanda. She opens her eyes and whispers. “Don’t you _dare_ say a word.”_ _

__I can’t help the cocky smirk I give her, before hurrying to the bathroom to take care of things._ _

__It’s still early, so I take a jog around the neighborhood to limber myself up. Nothing seems out of place or out of the ordinary. Nothing seems suspicious. It’s a bit overcast, and the wind is light, but it’s starting to warm up. By afternoon it will probably be insufferably warm._ _

__Everyone is awake when I return. Someone’s rolled up the blanket and piled them in the corner. I do a quick headcount, and Leda is missing._ _

__Sam elbows me. “Leda went to get food, I hope you like eggs.”_ _

__“Good thing I love eggs.”_ _

__Sam isn’t kidding. Leda returns with a virtual feast. Eggs and omelets, ham and assorted other breakfast foods. There’s a box of rolls too, and I take a couple for myself. The ham ends up mostly on Sam’s plate. I manage to save some for myself, Kwesi and Amanda and I catch Leda sneaking a bite when Soraya isn’t looking. She smiles playfully and winks at me._ _

__Sam mouths something at Alisha but I only catch Alisha nodding._ _

__“Alisha and I have a flight this afternoon.” Reyes points a fork at me. “Be careful.”_ _

__“We’ll be careful,” Sam promises. ”Besides I wanna take Alisha camping and fishing.”_ _

__“There better not be some kind of fish god.”_ _

__I keep my voice flat, but I’m hopeful that Reyes has relented on the ‘never seeing Alisha’ again thing. “We’ll take special care to avoid any kind of fish gods.”_ _

__“Ran across a fish god once,” Soraya muses. She gets a punch in the shoulder from Leda. “What?”_ _

__“You’re not helping. Finish eating and I’ll change all your bandages.”_ _

__Fish gods, or no, I pull Reyes aside after breakfast while Leda fusses with Kwesi and the other girls. “I’m still so sorry about all of this. I never meant for you or Alisha to get pulled in.”_ _

__“Lara, being around you is asking to get pulled in. You can’t help that. But promise me something. Once you take care of this Shaw problem, take a break. For yourself and for Sam, take a break.”_ _

__“Are you going to ground me if I don’t, mother?” I want us to leave on good terms. In case the worse happens._ _

__She gives me a sour look, but fails at hiding a smile. “You’re not too old to be taken across my knee.”_ _

__Even though there’s still the six of us, I feel a little empty when they’re gone. I’d gotten used to Alisha being around. She’ll be graduating high school before I even turn thirty, but she still feels like… part of my family. A sister I’d never had, and I want to be a part of her life for reasons that extend beyond her father. It wouldn’t be fair to her otherwise._ _

__We drive to the airfield the next morning, where we get our first look at the airplane that will take us to China. It’s a military surplus transport with two props and It looks a little worse for wear but we can drive the Land Rover right up into it. I’m not sure of the model but it looks about forty or fifty years old._ _

__I think Amanda voices all of our thoughts. “Can that thing actually fly?”_ _

__Kwesi laughs, long and heartily. “Yes, it will fly. It won’t be comfortable, but it will fly”_ _

__It takes several hours to get everything ready. The truck needs to be secured, and Amanda and I spend some time hiding the artifacts in hidden compartments. I don’t ask how Kwesi found us a smuggler’s plane, or if it was his idea or Raya’s. Gift horses and mouths and all._ _

__Kwesi’s flight path takes us through Russia, and then south into China. There are several stops for refueling and I choose a place where we can hopefully free the souls locked away in our artifacts safely. By the time we’re ready to go it’s dark._ _

__“I am ready to leave when everyone else is.”_ _

__“You’ve been up all day, we should get another night’s rest before we take off.” I really want to get going, but I can’t risk our safety over my impatience.”_ _

__“I can handle it, my friend. I’m too wired to sleep.” He clasps his hands on my shoulders. “I have done worse on less sleep and more stress. We’ll be fine. When we land to deal with the artifacts, I can nap. Just have Ms. Touma keep watch.”_ _

__“Okay, deal.” I hug him lightly, then climb down out of the cockpit. “Okay everyone, strap in, we’re taking off in five minutes!” I barely wait for them to sit before I’m checking their straps. Sam first, and then Amanda. I have to make sure they’re secure, I don’t want them hurt._ _

__Soraya and Leda aren’t ready. In fact I’m about to look for them when they walk up looking incredibly disheveled. Leda’s makeup is smudged and Raya’s hair is messed up. Sam applauds and I resist the very real urge to facepalm. “Right then. Walk of shame. Glad you enjoyed yourselves. Lets get you strapped in.”_ _

__Sam grips my hand as we start to rumble down the runway. The plane wobbles and shakes, the Land Rover bouncing in place as we pick up speed. The whine of the propellers reaches a crescendo pitch. Then we’re airborne and the rumbling stops. Vibrations still shake the fuselage, but it’s less loud. I can _almost_ hear myself think._ _

__Now that we’re airborne, I unstrap myself. “I think we’re going to push right for Russia. When we land to refuel Kwesi is going to take a nap. Soraya do you think you can keep watch on the plane?” It seems the best choice. They’re both injured but I need either her or Amanda for the artifacts and Soraya will be best with the plane._ _

__“Of course. You get to have all the fun with the artifacts?”_ _

__I shrug. “God knows what’ll come out of them. I want to do one before attempting to cleanse the others.”_ _

__Sam scrunches up her face and grabs my arm. “Are you sure we can’t just dump them from the air? They’ll hit the ground, break, and our problems will be over.”_ _

__“We _need_ to know if this works, Sam. For Setsuko. And it’s the right thing to do.” I lower my voice. “I’ve destroyed so many _lives_ Sam. I can’t condemn this many souls to destruction.”_ _

__She clearly doesn’t agree, but she doesn’t fight me on it. “Fine. I get that, I do. But think about this. What happens if Shaw gets ahold of these things before you can cleanse them? What if purging them makes it worse or they attack us once their free or something else goes wrong? How many of them are actually good people? I mean fuck the skulls. They don’t exactly give us the best vibes. They feed off of us, remember?”_ _

__I can feel them. Even though they’re bundled up and locked away, they’re still watching us, but it’s not really the skulls that get me anymore. I know them now, and as powerful as they are they don’t affect me like they used to. Or if they do I don’t notice, which is probably more dangerous. That kris on the other hand...that one is the one that scares me. It plays to the killer inside of me. That wolf or tiger that enjoys hunting people. I close my eyes for a moment, remembering the creature in Shaw’s lab. Then I get up. “We’ll do the ritual, but if we have to we’ll destroy them.”_ _

__“I have an idea on that.” Amanda gets up and follows me as I squeeze between the truck and the side of the plane. She favors her left arm as she squeezes in behind me_ _

__“I’m listening.”_ _

__“I think we should do one of the smaller artifacts first, just to get a feel for the ritual when it’s not involving a person. After that, we _really_ need to take care of those skulls.”_ _

__“Why the skulls?”_ _

__"Your theory is 17 powerful artifacts, right?"_ _

__"Seven skulls, ten other artifacts. Assorted smaller ones. We’ve found them all over the world but they all share certain similarities.” I glance in Sam’s direction. “Himiko was one, now she’s in the sword. I have my kris, and we’ve already eliminated the Mehit statue, though I’m starting to wonder if that’s even one of the ten.”_ _

__“And we have three skulls, right?”_ _

__I nod my head. “Yes. The sapphire, ruby and jade skulls. There are four others. I’m certain that Shaw has at least half of those and most of the other ten. I’m hoping there’s one in China. He needs as many of them as possible for whatever he had planned. The…” I trail off. “I saw something when I was unconscious. It’s what’s in tibet. A circle with six places, and ten more outside of that. The seventh place is taken up by a skull that’s fused to a throne.”_ _

__“So we’re going on this mad chase based on a dream?”_ _

__“Do you have a better idea?” I withdraw one of the skulls and take a good hard look at it. “I wish I knew how many he actually has. He beat us in Turkey and Iraq. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s an artifact in Brazil. It might be hard for you to go back there but we should consider it.” We have three. Shaw has those other two. The gold one in Tibet. If what my father hid is in China that would be the seventh._ _

__Amanda grows a little tightlipped, then reaches past me to pull out one of the bundled up skulls. She unwraps it to reveal the ruby one. It glows ominously. “Maybe. Regardless, this one needs to go first.”_ _

__“Why this one?” Placing the Jade skull back, I take the ruby from her, gently, and peer down into it’s eyes, trying to get an idea of what, or who, it is. Something tugs at my subconscious. Voices whisper in a language I don’t understand, setting my emotions on edge. I almost think it blinks._ _

__I scowl. “I think you’re the bastard that kept making Sam and I fight. It kind of feels like it thrives on conflict, doesn’t it.”_ _

__“I think it’s telling me to push you out of the plane.” Amanda wraps it up, and puts it back. I eye her, unsure if she’s joking or not. She glances back. She looks pale._ _

__“Are you all right?”_ _

__“Yeah… I’m fine. My arm, and this just…” She gestures towards the hidden artifacts. “I got this chill when I looked at it. Like it was looking back at me. Reminded me of that _thing_ in Brazil.”_ _

__I’m curious, and I ask as gently as I can. “You and your friend, you were close?”_ _

__“Yeah.” Her voice catches in her throat. “Real close.”_ _

__The look in her eyes tells me everything. More than she probably wants to share. I change the subject for her. “Lets see if we can use what we learned with Mehit to make this process go a little easier next time.”_ _

__For the next several hours the five of us discuss different approaches to the ritual. There’s a lot we don’t know about how it works, and I want to minimize the damage we could do to us or our surroundings._ _

__Kwesi calls me up to the cockpit, and I’m glad to go because we’ve moved on to other, more mundane subjects. Mostly Sam giving Leda wedding advice much to Soraya’s embarrassment and Amanda’s annoyance. Our wedding had been very lovely, but it’s not something I’m fond of talking about. It was too public as it was._ _

__I climb the ladder, ducking into the cockpit. “We’re getting close to landing, aren’t we?”_ _

__The man doesn’t say anything, instead pointing to our left. A fighter jet with the markings of the Russian Air Force is keeping pace with us. “Foxbat. They have ordered us to land.”_ _


	21. Stormbringer

Don’t panic, Lara says. It’s just a Russian Mig-25. It’s no big deal. We just need to land or _they’ll shoot us down._

“How the hell did you manage to piss off the _Russians_ ,” Amanda demands. 

I nod vigorously. “Seriously, Lara!”

“I didn’t do anything, this has to be some kind of mistake.”

“Mistake or not,” Soraya says. “If they find those weapons we’re fucked. We do _not_ want them to fuck with us.”

The next twenty minutes are spent frantically securing the weapon, and then I’m sitting strapped in as we land. I fiddle with my camera and turn it on. The only proof that it’s even on is the REC in the viewfinder - I disabled the led on this one because with some of the people we have to deal with you don’t want them knowing you’re actually filming.

And if the Russians are actually going to storm us I kind of want that on film. I mean, nearly everyone on this plane except Amanda is probably on some list of Putin’s of the kinds of people he hates. Leda looks _really_ nervous.

The plane hits the ground, bouncing several times and jostling us like crazy before it finally evens out. We taxi to a stop. Lara unbuckles herself, and goes to open the door. “No one move until we know what’s going on.”

I point my camera at the rear of the plane as the door lowers. It doubles as a ramp for the Land Rover, and several armed soldiers come up it. I put my hands on my head and Lara lifts her hands. The lead man speaks in Russian. I catch some of it. After the Island we’d both taken a Russian course. He wants to know which one of us is Lara.

_“I’m Lara Croft and this is my plane, what’s the reason for forcing us to land?”_

The soldier hits her with the butt of a gun. I scream her name but hands hold me back. Lara shouts for us to stay put as they hit her again, in the face popping her stiches, and in the stomach, before grabbing her and hauling her off the plane. The last soldier turns to us. “No one is to leave this plane until we say you can.”

He smacks his hand on the door button and jumps out before it closes on him. I’m hyperventilating and I probably would have charged after them if both Amanda and Leda didn’t have such strong grips on me. I squeeze my eyes shut as Kwesi slides down the ladder. “What are we gonna do?”

“We wait.” Soraya says, and I glare at her. How can she say that?! How can we _wait_ while those bastards are doing god knows what to my wife?

“She is right. There’s nothing we can do.” I hang my head. There’s nothing we can do to get her out. I pick up my camera to look over the footage. I have some… disturbingly good shots of them hitting Lara. 

I put on my best take-charge voice. “No, maybe we _can_ do something. We can find out how long they want to keep us. We can see if they’ll let us refuel. Can you two try to do that? It’s better than sitting here and doing nothing.” I hurry over to the truck and open the door, digging around for my laptop. “And if we’re really lucky we can pick up some wifi.”

Leda grins at me. “I can do you one better. We packed a satellite uplink. What’s your plan?”

I waggle my camera. “We’re going to cause an international incident.”

Realization dawns in Leda’s eyes. I hook my camera to my laptop while she hunts around for the satellite phone. I need to get this edited, but it’s not too hard to really show how bad it is. I don’t even need to do any cinematographic magic. The Russians did the hard work for us. With appropriate captions and ominous music, I fully intend on putting pressure on them for detaining British Nobility. 

Leda leans on my shoulder, watching me work. “Do you think this will work?”

“We’ll probably have some luck with it, considering Lara’s status and celebrity,” I point out. “It would be harder if it was Raya, I think. I’ve got an advantage in that I own a mega corporation.”

“If it was my Soraya, or me, the West would probably look the other way,” she responds, squeezing my shoulder. 

I glance back at her and nod. Her fear at the idea is palpable. “We’d still do everything we could for you both.”

“I know. That means a lot.” She hugs me and rests her chin on the top of my head. “The uplink is ready when you are.”

“Well I’m not ready but we don’t have a choice. The longer we take, the worst off Lara is going to be. I’m worried sick. God, this could backfire spectacularly.

Before I can start the upload I feel the plane start to move. “Whoa what’s happening? Where are we going!?”

Soraya peeks out from the cockpick “Calm down. They’re letting us refuel. ”

“What about Lara?”

“No word on her yet. I’m trying to see if they’ll let us talk to her.”

“Fuck this.” I sit back and thunk my head against the bulkhead. A thought occurs to me. “Let me know when we’ve got fuel. I think they’ll stop letting us fill up the tank once I upload this.”

“It should be about twenty minutes.” She ducks back in, and I turn my attention back to my laptop. It’s a long twenty minutes and I make tweaks while waiting. But I can’t do too much. Too much work will screw it up. As soon as Soraya says we have fuel, I hit send.

“You know, they could break in here and beat the crap out of us,” Amanda says. She’s just so _helpful_. “Not that they needed any more help to be publically embarrassed. Do you really think Lara is important enough that they’re going to get scared of a little video? I’m worried too, but just sitting here isn’t going to get us anywhere, and that video might just piss them off enough to do something. Genius plan, really.”

“I didn’t see you objecting when I brought it up!” I get up and face her, then push her in the chest. “Got a better idea? I think we’d all like to hear it.”

She grabs my wrist when I try to poke her again. “I think we need to break her out.” Amanda has a really strong grip, but I’m blown away by her words.

“Really?” They’d shoot us before we even got close.

“They’d shoot us before we even get close, but only if they see us first,” She says.

“Stay out of my head.” I yank my hand back from Amanda and pout a little. “So we just need to make sure they can’t see us.”

“Exactly.”

“It sounds like you have an idea.” Leda leans in, putting her arms around the both of us. “So spill it, blondie.”

As far as plans go, it’s not the worst plan I’ve ever been a part of. In a couple of ways it’s pretty clever. But it’s also really dangerous. _Get our asses in trouble_ dangerous. The kind of dangerous that leads to getting shot at. In other words, the kind of trouble we get into when dealing with a Croft. And since both Lara and I are Crofts, and the others are kinda honorary Crofts at this point, I guess we’re going for extra stupid dangerous.

Which is why I’m crawling through the undercarriage of an airplane, while armed men patrol right past our line of sight. To make things worse, the plane is moving, being taxied to a waiting position while Kwesi and Leda try the diplomatic route.

Raya is more likely to just shoot things, and Amanda can be abrasive. And I’m not about to stay out of saving Lara, so that’s how that works out. Even with their injuries it’s better if Leda tries to sweet talk them, while we -

“Now!” 

At Soraya’s order I let go and fall through the wheel well. I almost get run over and I hit the runway _hard_ , rolling like Lara taught me to do. I’m scuffed up, but otherwise unhurt, which is kind of miraculous if you ask me. Soraya doesn’t even grunt when she lands. Stiches in her neck and shoulders and she’s acting like she can’t even feel them. That’s pretty hardcore if you ask me.

Amanda’s plan hinges on a couple different things. First, that Lara is being held in the big empty hangar we landed near. Kwesi swears up and down he saw them take her in there. Next, the big man needs to keep them occupied. Between him and Leda they’re both kind of talky so I think distraction is covered.

Part three. Lara isn't going to like part three. I don't like part three. Part three I'm gripping very tightly in my hand. Himiko stirs, like some creature deep in the ocean just waiting to strike. This was too dangerous to do inside the airplane and near the other artifacts. But we're outside now. I draw the sword. "Okay, do your thing!"

The skies darken as clouds start to move in but that's really all that happens. I look at the katana, turning it over in my hands. "That's it? We need a mega-storm! Some fog. _Something!_ "

Amanda looks at me, then rolls her eyes. "Remember the ritual with Mehit? And that kris of Lara's? These things always need some kind of sacrifice."

"Oh." I frown at the sword, then look at my arm. Fuck that palm shit. Do you know how many nerves are in your hand? Too many! But there's the fleshy bit on the top of my forearm, and it doesn't take a very deep cut before the sword _wakes up_.

I'm channeling Himiko, and not just through the sword. She's tearing through my body. I still can't feel that piece of me that she stole. It’s confirmation that it’s gone forever but I can’t really mourn that yet. She's filling me. Filling that hole and threatening to push the rest of me out again. I hear Amanda's voice and I hear Soraya's but I don't know what they're trying to tell me. It's enough of a struggle keeping Himiko at bay. I don't think this is the sacrifice that Amanda meant.

Thunder crashes nearby and lightning splits the sky. I turn my head. The plane has come to a rest a few hundred feet away. I can see energy inside it, like auras.Two in the cockpit. A whole bunch more locked away in the artifacts. This is new.

"What's new, Sam?"

Amanda's voice snaps me back to the here and now. She looks terrified. I can feel lightning in my hands and on my skin. The clouds are so angry overhead. Rain pounds on the airport so hard that I can't see more than a foot ahead of me anymore. Even the plane is hidden from view now. How could I have forgotten what Himiko was like? How could I have felt _sorry_ for her?!

"Get Lara!"

She reaches for my hand, growing more and more desperate. "Stay with me. Don't lose yourself. What do you think she'd do if you lost yourself now, after everything you've been through? Come on!"

Is this it? I get Himiko out and the first chance I get I let her back in? I drop the sword. It hits the ground with a clang, and a spark of lightning shoots from it, hitting the fuel depot at the opposite end of the air base. The fireball shoots so high that we can feel the heat from here.

The wind gets suddenly worse for just a split second, then Amanda shoves the sheathe onto the sword and the wind dies. The rain is still falling, but it'll lessen.

"That's enough of a distraction, we can get Lara."

I turn towards Soraya's voice in time to catch her lowering a pistol. She was going to...oh god. My entire body suddenly feels numb, but she grabs my arm and hauls me towards a door in the side of the hangar. "Be calm. I knew you could do it."

"Then why the gun?"

"Because I'm sometimes wrong."

I can't argue with that logic, and it isn't like I haven’t asked Lara to do the same. I know she would. I know she'd hurt and regret and question it, but she would have. And I think Soraya would take that blame for herself rather than let Lara carry it. So I just nod at her. "Okay lets find her."

Amanda has the sword in a tight grip. At least someone grabbed it, I'm almost willing to leave the fucking thing behind. But it's also my responsibility. My fault. I reach for it and she shakes her head at me. "We'll talk about it later. Right now you're still vulnerable."

I don't like it. But maybe I should let her have it. Like there's some kind of freedom in letting go. Himiko and Yamatai have haunted me for five years. But I itch to hold the sword again, and Himiko is calling for me.

The power is out inside the hangar and combined with the clouded sky it's pretty dark. I can hear people shouting in Russian. They're wondering what's up with the storm and someone is shouting orders to investigate the explosion. There's a figure visible in the dim emergency lights against one wall. It's Lara and she's running towards us?

I grab her and hug her super tight.

"Sam, what are you doing here?" She takes us all in. "They're letting me go. Get out of here before you make them think you somehow caused lightning to blow up their fuel depot."

She gives me a _very pointed look_ , before pushing us back towards the side door. "I'll meet you back at the plane. Go!"

I'm reeling. Confused. It figures she'd somehow get loose or get let go just as we're staging a heroic rescue. Soraya voices that thought for me. "Next time she can rescue herself, she always does."

"At least this time there's not a research building filled with people trying to kill us?"

Amanda groans. "Why am I with you people again?"

Giving her a bright smile, I reply, "For our stunning beauty, cutting wit, and first class airfare."

Our first class airfare is ready to go when we board. Leda tells us that they released Lara just before the lightning got serious. Go me and my awesome timing. 

"Once the wind and rain dies down, we can take off." Kwesi looks exhausted. I'm actually frightened for him - and us. I don't think he got to have his nap. I glance at Soraya and nod my head towards him.

She nods at me, then puts her arm around Kwesi. "I can take care of that. You need to rest. Take a few hours in the back of the Land Rover and we'll wake you for the landing in China. We'll probably be a few days there so that'll give you a chance to sleep."

"You've been wonderful." Lara's voice echoes off the fuselage as she jogs up the ramp. "We owe you so much, thank you." She takes Kwesi's hand and squeezes. "But they're right, you need to rest. You're no good to yourself or us like this."

The right side of Lara's face is puffy and bruised, and she's got a black eye and split lip. She’ll need to have the stitches in her cheek put back in. I can't see any other visible signs of abuse, but I'm not going to take any chances. So I take charge again. "Here's what's gonna happen, Sweetie. Soraya is going to get us in the air. Then Leda and me are gonna go over you with a fine tooth comb, got it? We'll have Amanda hold you down if we have to."

"Keep me out of this."

Ignoring Amanda, I hold up a finger before Lara can speak. "I'm not gonna hear it."

"Fine, check me over," she says, sinking gingerly onto a seat. "But while you do, you _really_ have to tell me why the British Consulate secured my release."

“Eh heh…” Everyone looks at me, and Lara raises her eyebrows. “Well you see, Sweetie, I might have caused an international incident.”

We don’t take off for another half an hour, which gives me plenty of time to explain to Lara why there’s video on the internet of her getting roughed up by the Russians. And the storm thing. I’m _pretty_ she she wants to throttle me but I disarm her with my best most sheepish smile. I mean, she did marry me, so it’s totally her fault that she has to put up with my bullshit. She knew about that going in!

Once we’re airborne and the good captain is zonked out, Leda and I run a thorough inspection of Lara. She’s battered, but the worse is on her cheek, which Leda has to stitch back up. I’m _pissed_. I really should have just...set them all on fire with my epic lightning powers.

I drift off at some point, because when I open my eyes my face is pressed against Lara’s shoulder, and there’s a weight against my back and shoulder from who I think is Amanda. I wipe some drool from my mouth and sit up carefully.

“We landing soon?”

Lara yawns, winces, then nods her head. “We’re already descending. We should be landing in Xi’an in ten minutes.”

Already? I lean in towards her. “Is that close to where we want to be?”

Lara nods her head. “Yes, very close. It shouldn’t be a very long drive at all. The longest part of it will be obtaining access to the tomb itself.”

Amanda stirs next to me. She sits up. I glance back at her and her hair is flattened on one side of her head. She looks at us blearily. “ So how are we even going to do that?” 

“There’s an old excavation site, I believe we can gain access there. Once we’re inside we just need to figure out where my father hid the artifact, grab it, and get out before Shaw’s people decide to make their appearance.”

“I don’t think we’ll have much time,” Leda says. “But maybe your video will distract them into searching in Russia.”

Lara pats a hand on my leg. Like she’s thanking me. She better be thanking me! “They’ll figure out our flight path eventually but that does give us at least a day’s lead.”

“So you’re not mad about the international incident?”

My wife chuckles, and brushes my hand with hers. “Only a little. Sometimes it’s better to fight like that than by hurting people.”

“It worked, so I win, and I can’t wait to get out of this rust bucket.”

“Yeah,” Amanda says. She stretches, and then clasps her hands in her lap. “...Can’t wait. Why do I have a feeling this is all going to go wrong?”

“Probably because it usually does,” Leda offers.


	22. The Difference is Human

The beatdown hurt more than I care to admit. They got a few good blows at my face and ribs, and then tied me to a chair asking every question they could think of about Yamatai. They wanted to know what I’d found there, they questioned me on the measures I took to survive, and why I’d killed Russian nationals. They didn’t believe many of the stories concocted by the media, or what they consider a coverup by the Japanese of some kind of oil or gas discovery near the island.

Nothing I said got through to them. The only thing they were willing to accept was that I’d defended myself. I don’t know what prompted them to accept that, if they weren’t willing accept the island being an archaeological wonder and not a fossil fuel wonder. Maybe they just respected what I’d done, or didn’t have enough evidence to do anything about it.

I didn’t even _try_ to tell them about the Sun Queen.

Most of the flight I worry about Sam. It’s not really the issue with her little video. It got me out of there sooner rather than later, and we’ll deal with my further celebrity after the fact. And after Sam makes another youtube documentary of our adventures.

I worry more about her losing control over Himiko. She’s not _telling_ me something, and that bothers me. I’m grateful to Amanda. She took the sword and isn’t letting Sam near it no matter how many times my wife stares at it. She’s got more distance between Yamatai than either myself or Sam. Other than Soraya, I don’t think there’s anyone else I’d trust more to hold onto it.

Our luck improves when we land in China. No police or soldiers are waiting for us, and with the permits that Soraya secured we’re able to take my Land Rover out of the airport. Kwesi stays with the plane and the artifacts, and the rest of us go to explore the Mausoleum of the First Qin Emperor. It’s famous world wide for the well-preserved terracotta statues of soldiers, horses and craftsmen that lay buried within.

Much of the tomb is sealed. There’s fear that exposure to air could damage the clay army, and I’m not about to destroy yet another archaeological wonder. But if it’s sealed, then my father had to have hidden his discovery in an area that was already uncovered.

We park somewhat far away, and make the trek towards the burial mound. The complex is truly massive. “I almost wish we could explore the uncovered areas.”

Amanda shoots me a look. “Yeah and turn the whole place to dust as soon as we break in.”

“I’m aware of what oxygen exposure can do.”

“Because the last place we went got destroyed.”

“And we’re better prepared this time,” I snap back.

“We were prepared _last_ time.”

“Ladies, stop bickering.” Leda finishes picking the lock and unloops the chain from a very old door. “Lets find this thing before we have company.”

She pushes the door open, and I lead the way inside. It smells old, and the air is stale in this area. There isn’t much but old crates and it’s clear it was a staging area. I glance back at the door, then pick up the chain. “Grab that rebar, we’re going to make it harder for someone to come in from the outside.”

Soraya and I twist the rebar into the chain. It’s simple enough for someone on this side to push it out and get the door open, but from the outside they’ll be barred.

Turning on my torch, I head deeper inside. The only sounds are our footsteps and Soraya checking the safety of her MP5. I’ve got my axe and pistol at my hips for comfort, and as always there’s a bow around my chest. The others are similarly armed with either a pistol or an MP5. None of us wants to potentially deal with those pale bastards unarmed. Or be unprepared if Shaw shows up. What a sight we must make. Three of us bandaged up, all of us armed and Sam in what she calls designer exploring wear.

I squeeze myself through a crack in the wall, and the view is breathtaking. Thousands of terracotta soldiers lined up in formation. Some are indeed mounted. Stepping aside so the others can crawl through, I take it all in. It’s nothing like seeing it in pictures or on film. Sam already has her camera up as she comes out. Leda is the last through. It’s a much tighter squeeze for her than the rest of us, but not so tight as to trap her. I reach down to help her up, then return my gaze to the Terracotta Army.

“I’ve never been here before.” Amanda’s voice is quiet. I turn to her and she gives me a tight smile. “Always wanted to see it. So thanks. I guess.” She has Himiko strapped to her back. Between that and the wolf figurine in my pocket I’m hoping we can find what we’re looking for. Sam gives the sword a hard look, then looks away.

“We seem to be alone. My father liked to hide things in plain sight, so keep that in mind. It will probably be something we look right at, but not realize it’s what we’re supposed to be looking for.” There’s so much hidden in his work in his study, that sometimes I didn’t realize I was looking at something important until I’d stared at it for a few hours. Half our ritual process came from hours of that.

“Do you think we’re looking for a skull?” Sam falls in line besides me. I knock my hand against hers.

“Yes. I would have assumed Jade, but we already have a Jade one and I doubt there are two of the same mineral.”

We’ll probably be searching for hours, but I’m willing to put in the time. After all, we have to do everything we can to keep these things away from Shaw. He’s clearly power mad. Like Mathias in some respects, but with Shaw there’s no island to escape. His motivation is a mystery. Does he think he can make money from all this? I don’t know.

Amanda seems captivated by the soldiers. She doesn’t touch any - she’s too well trained for that, but she does take them in with her eyes, and directs Sam on where to point her camera for best effect. That frees me up to keep more of an eye out for the artifact, though I offer commentary when Sam or Amanda asks.

There’s a sudden charge in the air, and I turn to Amanda. She draws the sword just enough to see the crackle of energy on the blade, then sheathes it. “I think we’re close.”

“Just like Frodo,” Leda remarks. That brings a laugh from the group, and we turn down an inclined tunnel. I don’t plan it this way, but we line up in a way that suits us well. Soraya covering our rear, then Leda, Amanda, Sam and finally myself in front. I know Sam is looking through a viewfinder, and Amanda is probably writing a dissertation on this tomb in her head. 

No one talks any more. The tunnel twists sharply to the left, leading into a large chamber filled with more soldiers. Many are on horseback. They’re all armoured with stone, the crafters having lovingly created the armor separate, and then donning the statues in it. I feel a tug, and follow it, sliding my hand into my pocket to finger the wolf figurine. “It’s in here somewhere, keep an eye out.

“Lara, here!” I follow the sound of Soraya’s voice. One soldier isn’t quite like the others. He has on a helmet, but when I peer into the helmet I see an eerie glow. Soraya lifts the helmet off, and a skull stares back at me.

The skull is a luminous sky-blue with just a bit of a green tint to it. It's probably turquoise, which like Jade is a material the Chinese have used for their art and jewellry for centuries. When I touch it, it feels warm, but unlike the other skulls I don't feel uneasy. In fact I feel welcome. There’s a deceptive undercurrent that I can’t quite trust. Sam’s arm markings are starting to glow.

Soraya shouts wordlessly. I turn in time to watch her intercept an arrow shot at Leda. One of the Terracotta Warriors turns it’s head towards me and it’s eyes glow with the same colour as the skull as it draws back another arrow.

All around us is the rumbling of stone coming to life. One atop a horse shouts orders in an ancient Chinese dialect, his voice booming through the tomb. _God_ , I hate tombs.

The first gunshot comes from Leda as she blows the head clean off the one that shot Soraya. She keeps shooting, tapping three shots at a time as she moves to cover Sam and Soraya. Sam kneels next to the mercenary, trying her best to staunch the bleeding. I unsling my bow and nock an arrow. “Sam, don’t pull out that arrow yet! Just keep pressure on the wound!”

One of the soldiers charge. I shatter it with an arrow, then draw another. They’re moving inhumanly fast. Leda is making her shots count with her bursts. I have to admire her steadiness. Amanda is on my left, but the army is going to flank us any second. They’re here to protect that skull. They have to be! I grab it. “I’m going to lure them away, get the others back to the entrance!”

I sprint forward, using my axe to cut a swath through the soliders. Amanda is right behind me. “Don’t be stupid, you can’t do this alone.”

The army chases after us, the ground thundering with their passage. The rapid chattering of gunfire fades in the distance behind us, but a quick glance back assures me most of them have taken the bait. I have to trust Leda to protect Sam and Soraya. It looks like they’re already trying to drag Soraya to safety.

There’s too many, and I don’t have enough arrows _or_ bullets. “The sword!”

“Damn it!” Amanda draws it, turning and slashing the nearest soldier in the same motion. There’s a crack like a cannon as the attack unleashes a wave of lighting, smashing and shattering everything in it’s path.

My ears ring. I grab her arm as we stagger away, blinking vision back to my eyes. Amanda is blinded too, and her face is red from the heat of the blast.

“Are you all right?” I ask, once I’m certain our hearing has return.

“Yeah, I’m.. fine.” She sheathes the sword and then falls back against the wall. I catch her before she hits her head. “Okay so respect to your wife for still standing after doing shit like that.”

“You’ll get used to it.”

She looks at the sword and frowns. “She still likes Sam a whole lot. I’m only temporary.”

“Consider that a blessing.” I help her back to her feet. We needed to make our way back to the others. “Damn, there’s more of them. We’ll need to route around, but they’ll follow the skull wherever we go.”

“At least we aren’t dealing with-”

“Don’t even say it, Amanda.”

The blonde rolls her eyes. “At least we’re not dealing with pale, starry-eyed monsters.”

“Thanks, now I’m _sure_ you’ve summoned one.”

“I think you’ll dispatch it with murderous ease.” Amanda waggles the sheathed sword at me.

“Is that a hint of admiration in your voice?” I nudge her to the side, drawing my pistol and shooting the first of a dozen stone soldiers coming up on us. “Move!”

Amanda starts to run and I’m right behind her. “Here!” She darts to the left and through a large arching doorway that is half-open. As soon as I’m through, she slams it shut. I tip over a chariot to offer a barricade.

When I turn, something hard hits me in the face, right on the side that’s already sore from the Russians. My vision explodes into stars and spots and I lash out, kicking my assailant away. They hit the ground with a very feminine grunt. _Giovanna._

She pulls herself to her feet, but I grab her, twisting and slamming her against the wall, my elbow at her throat. “I owe you a lot more than this. What are you doing here?”

Giovanna coughs, and I relent a little. “How far behind is Shaw?”

“Not far.” Her grin is infuriating.

“That’s fine, I’ll handle him.”

“Like you handle everyone that gets in your way? You’re just like him.”

“This again? How many times am I going to _hear_ that?” I let go of her, huffing in disgust. I keep my pistol trained on her. I want her to have no doubt that I intend to shoot her if she makes the wrong move. Part of me wants to regardless.

“Have you ever stopped to ask yourself that? Why you keep hearing it?” The Italian rubs at her neck. She keeps her hands in view when I flick the safety off. “If people keep calling you a monster, surely there is some truth to it?”

“I’m a survivor, Giovanna.” She’s not wrong. The skull in my pack holds extra weight, and for a very brief moment I feel shadows closing in. I ignore them. “But the difference between me and Shaw is I feel remorse.”

“Will you feel remorse if you shoot me?”

“Just a little.” She tried to kill me. She’d try to kill Sam, I’m sure of it. She’s no better than Shaw, and in some ways she’s worse. She almost got me to _trust_ her.

Giovanna gets a maddening smile. “Or Amanda?”

“Pardon?” I glance to my left, right into the barrel of Amanda’s gun. My heart sinks into my stomach.

Amanda’s jaw quakes and her eyes are red and rimmed with tears. “Lara, I’m sorry.”

I lower my weapon, and Giovanna takes it from me, but I can’t tear my eyes from Amanda’s. “You’re with _them_?!”

“Of course she is, you really think a woman like her has _anything_ in common with that big oaf? Of course neither of us had any idea we were both working you. That was just a happy little accident.”

“Shut _up_ , Giovanna. I _like_ Jonah.”

I feel like I’ve been shot in the chest. It’s hard to breathe. Everyone I try to… _Who_ can I even trust anymore? I don’t know. Sam. I can only trust Sam. This revelation makes me doubt _everyone_ else. And poor Jonah. “But you don’t _love_ him.”

Giovanna takes the skull from my pack, and bounces it in her hands. “In this line of work, sometimes you have to do things you would not otherwise do. I think we’re all aware of that.” She turns, and starts to walk towards another exit. “It’s nothing personal, Lara.”

I keep my eyes on Amanda, trying to read her, trying to _understand_ I feel… I feel _shattered_. I can’t even focus on Giovanna or what she’s saying. “I considered you a _friend._ ”

“I tried to hate you,” she says. The gun shakes in her hand. “I really did. I tried to hate you and Sam. It would have made this so much easier. But I like you both too much. Even when you’re being fucking annoying.”

“ _Why?_ ” I’m ashamed of the pain in my voice. I’m ashamed of how much this _hurts_. 

“Like Giovanna says, it’s not personal. I didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want to hurt _anyone_.”

“What does Shaw have on you?”

“I can’t...tell you that.”

But that means Shaw has something on her. I take a step forward and the gun in her hand shakes more. Effortlessly, I take it from her. Setting the safety, I tuck it into my trousers and then grab Amanda by the shoulders. “Let me _help_ you! We can stop Shaw, we can get him off of whatever he’s blackmailing you with. You don’t have to do this. I _know_ you hate him and Giovanna, you can’t _fake_ that amount of loathing.”

She laughs, hard and bitter and full of pain. “Oh my god. I’m stabbing you in the back and you want to _help_ me?” She catches me off guard, her action so sudden and unexpected that I can’t even react. Amanda lunges her head forward and _kisses_ me.

Her lips are soft and warm, and I let go of her in shock, but her hand threads into the hair on the back of my head before I can pull away. She breaks the kiss, and my body gives me mixed signals on that. She’s only the second person besides Sam that I’ve ever felt anything while kissing, and that rocks me to my core. 

Her lips flutter against mine. “I’ve been wanting to do that for weeks.”

“But Sam.” I’m with Sam, I can’t go kissing other people. Even if Amanda is the one that kissed _me_. I keep turning it over in my head. Did I kiss her back? Did I like it. Wasn’t she in the middle of _betraying_ me? Giovanna has the last skull. Everything is crashing down around me.

“Her too.”

While I try to wrap my brain around _that_ statement, Amanda starts to back away. She gestures helplessly with her hands. “I’m sorry. I hope you understand some day. I like to think you would.”

I could shoot her. It wouldn’t be hard. I can just wound her, but I let her go. I’m too hurt and conflicted to want to deal with any of this. The door behind me bursts open, and I have no choice but to push everything to the back of my mind. I run from the Terracotta Soldiers. At least they’ll be Giovanna’s problem and I can safely get to Sam and the others. 

I don’t know what I’m going to _tell_ Sam. My mind is reeling. Amanda is gone, she has the sword, and she _kissed_ me.

She obviously infiltrated us with the intention of using us, but it hadn’t worked out like that. She seems like such a stubborn person that whatever Shaw has on her has to be important. I’ll sort through my feelings later. Anger and disappointment and confusion aren’t going to help me right now, but I’ve gotten very good at shutting my emotions down.

I follow the sound of gunfire, sprinting past a pair of charging horsemen. I see Leda’s head poking out from the end of the tunnel and I put everything I have into catching up. I dive and roll into the storeroom, and Leda and Sam start shoving crates and other objects to barricade the tunnel.

Soraya is in a bad way. I kneel next to her to check her wound. They’d removed the arrow and cauterized both sides. I pat Soraya’s cheek until she blinks her eyes open at me. “Hey. Hey. It looks like we’re going to have matching scars. We’ll have Sam get you a scandalous swim suit that still hides it. She’s good at that, remember?”

I fumble in her pocket until I find the radio. “Kwesi. this is Lara. Come in! I need you to get that plane airborne, _now_. You can pick us up later. Just get into the air!”

“Lara, what’s going on?” Sam kneels next to me. There’s silence from the radio. 

“I ran into Giovanna, she got the skull.” I press the switch again. “Kwesi, come in! _Captain!_ Damn it!”

“We have to get Raya to a hospital.” Leda’s voice is shaking. She’s held on this long, and it’s clear she doesn’t have much longer before she loses it. I hand the radio to Sam.

“Keep trying Kwesi, we have to warn him before Shaw’s goons show up.” I pick Soraya up. She’s heavier than I expected, but there’s a great deal of muscle under her khakis. “Leda, you’re on point, we’ll get her to the Land Rover and head to the nearest hospital.”

“Where’s Amanda?”

“With Giovanna. She was a _plant_.”

The look on Sam’s face mirrors the way I feel. “I mean we didn’t get along at first but I was starting to like her… _fuck_... I thought she was just prickly. I don’t _understand_.”

That makes two of us. “Shaw has something on her.”

“It was still her choice,” Leda says. “We’re always given a choice. The difference is in how we handle it.”

Maybe Leda is right. Maybe Amanda could have made a different choice. One that wouldn’t bring us to odds against each other. I have to wonder if I have it in me to end her if she puts herself between me and stopping Shaw. 

On some of the things Giovanna said, she was right. Surely there must be _some_ truth to it, when it’s so easy to pull the trigger. That doesn’t mean I have to like it, though.


	23. In This Together

I spend most of the ride to the hospital in a funky haze, trying to dial Kwesi and getting nothing. Everything had been going so well. One minute we were being all adventure friends, and the next minute Soraya is bleeding out and Amanda has betrayed us. I mean, there isn’t a word stronger. _Betrayal._ And to think I was starting to _like_ her.

How we’re even going to explain this to the authorities I don’t even know. We stowed all our weapons on the way, everything except the bow. I guess ‘archery accident’ is our cover story. I’m not sure anyone buys it. This is _Lara Croft_ , even the nurse recognizes her and we’re barraged with questions about everything from ghosts to mummies while they cart Soraya away. I add Chinese to the growing list of things I really need to learn.

Unable to reach Kwesi, I call our curator buddy Gyasi. Lucky for us he’s friends with a couple people in Beijing and promises to speed through some additional permits. Backdated, of course. 

I collapse into an uncomfortable chair between Lara and Leda. Lara’s staring at the radio, a dejected look on her face. “Sweetie? Good news, Gyasi is going to pull some strings. Make sure we can, you know, _leave_ China.”

She looks up, smiling faintly. “For the curator of a museum that man has some pull.”

“He knew your father. That seems to be a running theme. It’s a golden ticket to crazy town or a free pass out of trouble. Usually both. Any luck getting the captain?”

She shakes her head, and she’s totally fearing the worse. I poke her knee. “He’ll be fine. Worse case he’s been captured and we’ll rescue him. I think he’d enjoy being the damsel. More stories to tell.” I wonder if he has kids. They’d probably be super cute.

“I’m not losing anyone else. I’m afraid for Reyes and Jonah. All we can do is warn them not to trust Amanda.” 

I’d tried in the car, but they hadn’t answered. I might have left a slightly babbling message. “Jonah really likes her and she _used_ him.”

Lara just shrugs her shoulders. “I know. I’m not going to defend that. I just...I’m still struggling to accept it, I guess.” She goes silent, and picks up the radio to try to raise Kwesi again.

I’m trying not to think about Amanda. So much for making friends. Maybe I’ll just lock myself up at the manor and only ever talk to Winston. And if Soraya hadn’t proven herself already I’d be suspicious. Leda looks like she’s trying not to freak out. I put an arm around her and squeeze. “Raya’s a tough woman, she’ll get through this.”

She mutters something, in Greek I think. Now I know a couple three languages and Greek isn’t one of them, but I let her vent. It’s better than freaking out, at least. Then she sags against me. “I always knew this would happen some day. She’s come home before, with a bullet in her arm, or new scars. Once I thought she’d lost an eye. But nothing ever this serious. And for what? To have our backs stabbed and lose the thing we’d gone there for? Kwesi is missing. They probably took the plane, which means they have the rest of the artifacts. We lost.”

I get this sinking feeling in my stomach. Shit. Shit shit. Leda’s right. If we can’t reach him that probably means they have the plane. If they have the plane, they have the artifacts. Well, most of them. I know Lara stuffed something in the Land Rover.

“Lara, how many of the artifacts _weren’t_ on the plane?”

She looks up, and smiles tightly. “The kris and the wolf. And Himiko, but Amanda took her. So that means they have the Jade, ruby, and sapphire skulls. And now the turquoise skull. Plus whatever they had before. I’m pretty sure they have everything they need. Even without the kris I think Shaw has enough for his plans.”

Amanda has Himiko. Oh that’s just _great_. I don’t know why, but I feel...jealous. Himiko is _my thing_. She’s my ancestor and I’m supposed to deal with her! “So chances are they have all seven skulls.”

“It’s likely.”

Leda lifts her head again. “How are you so sure about this?”

“Call it a gut feeling.”

“What about the big ten?” I ask.

Leda raises her eyebrows. “Big ten?”

“Lara’s number thingie. Seven, ten and one-twenty-eight?” I throw up my hands. “Come on I actually pay attention you know!”

“I believe you. But what about them, then?”

“Shaw probably has most of them too.” Lara sounds so dejected. “Himiko is probably the most powerful. The kris isn’t too far behind.” She sifts around in her pocket and looks at the wolf. “I’d thought this was a lesser one.”

I wonder what the one-twenty-eight have to do with anything. Or if that’s some kind of red herring. “Do you think he needs to collect all the others too? And can he do whatever he’s planning without them?”

“I doubt it. He was using the lesser ones to experiment with, but he didn’t seem as concerned with them as he was with the skulls. And what he needs most are the skulls. I believe the others just amplify their power, or add additional knowledge. There’s a danger of overloading himself if he has too many, too.”

Good. Maybe throwing Himiko in there will fry his brain. Talking about all this seems to be doing us some good. What else can we do right now but talk? We don’t know if Raya will make it, we don’t know if Kwesi is alive, and Reyes and Jonah aren’t answering their phones. I’m about ready to tear my hair out or call them again when Lara’s phone rings.

“It’s Reyes.” She gets up and starts to pace as she answers. I can only hear her side of the conversation, but she looks and sounds relieved. She exchanges a few more short words with Reyes, then winces as she hangs up. “I’m pretty sure Reyes is going to shoot Amanda if she ever shows her face there. They’re all fine. Jonah’s grandmother is doing well, too. They think it was a case of some kind of food poisoning. It didn’t turn out to be severe.”

I close my eyes. “Thank god. Small favors, am I right?”

“It sounds kind of suspicious.” Lara frowns, sitting next to me. She leans against me. “His grandmother just so happens to get sick, taking him out of danger.”

I elbow her. “What, you think Amanda got her sick to protect Jonah?”

“I don’t know. That’s probably stretching it.”

“You think?” We fall silent. I pick at a nail, then put an arm back around Leda. She turns her head to me and smiles through red-rimmed eyes. I can imagine what she’s going through. I’ve gone through it too many times with Lara. To know that someone you love, _the person_ that you love the most is hooked to machines and could die? Soraya is still in surgery. She might not come out of it.

Leda looks away, then down at her hands. “I am going to stay here with her. I’m sorry. But whatever you do next will have to be on your own. However I can help here, I will. I know people. Soraya knows people. They can get you whatever you need.”

Well duh. I expected that. But still, actually hearing it in real life words kind of hurts. I look at Lara, who’s all stiff upper lip about it. She just nods, and leans back against the wall. Thinking this over, maybe. Jonah and Reyes have to stay out of the picture. We can’t put them in any more danger, especially with Alisha there. Kwesi is missing in action. Soraya might die and neither of us can blame Leda for wanting to be there for her. This isn’t her fight. Raya’s, maybe, since she knew Lara’s father and all, but Leda got dragged into this because of her devotion and love. Maybe we could call Gyasi again but he’s already helped us enough and I like the old man and I don’t want him hurt either. That leaves just me and Lara. 

And Amanda...well Amanda… Fuck Amanda. She stabbed us in the back and I can’t even tell if Lara actually forgives her or just is just telling herself that she should. She’s angry. And she’s sad at the same time. It’s kind of depressing. How many friends do we even have left? They’re all either dead or don’t want to talk to us or _stabbed us in the fucking back_. 

I squeeze Leda and then get up. “I’m gonna pee.” And I kind of need a moment to myself, too. Once I’m in the ladies room, I splash some water in my face. Which is kind of funny. Why do people always do that? I don’t know. But it helps me think and wakes me up a little.

The face that stares back at me looks older than I’d like. I’ve got some new lines. All this shit is making me age too fast and I have a moment to completely freak out at that. It’s shallow and it’s stupid but sometimes I’m shallow and stupid. Why can’t we have those days back? Why does everything have to always _hurt_ us so much!

The marks on my arms glow, even though the Sun Queen is gone. I don’t know if they’re trying to tell me something or if I’m still somehow linked to her. Maybe a piece of her is still in me, hidden away in the hole she’d ripped out. I try to make lightning, or a cloud or a drizzle but it doesn’t work. Now I’m empty and powerless too. Great.

I fiddle with the ring on my finger. The engagement ring is back home, nice and safe in Lara’s study, but I’ve got my band and you’d have to cut my finger off to get it off. The action calms me. Grounds me as Sam. Sam, _not_ the Sun Queen. I have to remind myself I’m who I am, that I have worth beyond being Lara’s damsel to save or being the descendant of an all powerful weather witch. It had felt _so good_ when I’d confronted Shaw like that on the oil rig. I’d never been so free. I’d like to do it again.

That power had to have come from somewhere, and from everything Lara tells me the ritual to pass her soul into another body is related or derived from what created those artifacts. I bring the ring to my lips and press it against them. I guess I’m going to see this to the end. wonder how long I’ll have Lara to myself after this is done, before she wants to get back out into the world. 

Wiping my eyes, I fix my makeup and leave the bathroom. Leda’s sitting alone. I look around and my insides freeze. “Oh god, _Lara_. How long?”

“About two minutes. She went out the back. Sam-”

I don’t hear the rest, because I’m grabbing my pack and I’m _running_ as fast as I can. Lara’s _not_ doing this to me! I get outside and guess what, it’s actually drizzling! Just perfect. I can see the Land Rover. The headlights are on and Lara’s inside. I sprint onto the pavement as she pulls out of the parking spot and then I do something _really_ stupid.

It’s pure luck that Lara doesn’t run me over. The Land Rover skids to a stop just inches from me and I slam my hands onto the hood. “ _Lara!_ ” She’s in _so_ much trouble right now. I rush around to the passenger side and try to rip the door open before she can lock it. 

“Sam, go back inside!”

“Nope.” Climbing in, I slam the door hard enough to make her jump, then buckle myself up. “I remember something about being in this together. I’m not letting you do this alone.”

“I can’t let anything happen to you!”

“It’s too late!” Is she so worried about me that she can’t see it? “I’m already a part of it! I’ve had my soul shoved out and back in, I’m having nightmares straight out of Lovecraft, and my _wife_ is trying to go save the world without me!” It’s all starting to catch up to me, too. I try to blink away tears as my chest gets tight and heavy. “Lara, you’ve taught me to defend myself. You _can’t_ do this alone and you _don’t_ have to watch over me. I’m tired of being useless. I’m going to help you, as your _partner_. I’m going to help you, and record it and we’ll show the world what kind of man Shaw is, and what kind of woman you are.”

“I’m not sure I want the world to see what kind of woman I am.” Lara’s voice quivers. I lean over, turning her face and kissing her soundly, careful of the stitches on her cheek. The rain patters harder on the roof of the Land Rover.

“They’ll see the woman that I see, Lara. The sweet, dorky and determined woman who burned down an island to save the people she cares about. The brilliant, witty scientist who just wants to show people the wonders of the past. The adventure-seeker.” And sure, not everyone will love her the way I do, but that’s okay with me. “But you can’t leave me. You _can’t_ leave me, and then come back. I don’t need to see the future to know how that’ll go. You’ll come back, and I’ll patch you up, and you’ll be around for awhile before you have to leave again. And then one day you’ll be too slow, one day you won’t come back, and _I’ll never know_.”

Lara’s voice drops to a raspy whisper. Her eyes are almost as red as Leda’s were earlier. “Are you always going to come _with_ me then?”

“I’ve kept up with you this far, right?”

She takes my hands, squeezing them, before running her fingers tenderly over my markings. “And what happens when _you_ get too slow? What happens if I have to watch you die?”

“That won’t happen.” I try to smile through my own tears. “I think we both know which of us is going to go first.”

Lara makes a choked sound, and presses her forehead against mine. “I thought you weren’t predicting the _future_ , Sam.”

I kiss her. I try to kiss her with the kind of kiss that’s supposed to be accompanied by swelling music, but I just … dissolve into a sobbing mess. Just _thinking_ about her buried in some tomb for all eternity breaks my heart. I bury my face against her shoulder as she drives us away from the hospital. 

My phone buzzes and I pull it out while fishing around for some tissues or napkins. “Hello?”

Leda’s voice comes out the other end. “Sam, did you catch her?”

“Yeah. I’m not sure where she’s going so I hope she has a plan, but I’m handcuffing myself to her if I have to.”

“Good. Soraya is out of surgery. She lost a lot of blood and developed an infection but the doctor says she’ll probably be okay. I think this was her last adventure.” Leda goes silent for a long moment. “I’m going to stay here. But you two come back. You have to come to our wedding.”

“We’ll be there, I promise. Crofts always keep their promises.”

The only stop we make is to retrieve the weapons, and get something with caffeine in it. Turns out coffee is getting pretty popular in China and the place we found makes a pretty good brew. The warmth of the beverage is reassuring.

An hour or so after I’d hung up and about thirty minutes after the storm started to get worse, Lara pulls into a dilapidated neighborhood. It’s the kind of slum you usually see only on the news when they’re trying to make a foreign country look worse than it is. “Where are we?”

“Safe house.”

“Seriously? Who the hell had a safe house already prepared in Shaanxi province?”

“Roth.”

“Because of course he did. You know, if this were a movie I’d call that a convenient plot device.” Still, I help her get our gear into the safe house. It looks worse on the inside. I spot a rat, who actually comes up and begs us for food. I decide to call him Alex. He’s about as cute as Alex was.

“You’re a regular Disney princess, you and your street rat,” Lara comments. I throw her duffel bag at her.

Lara catches it, and sets it down. She inspects the bed and it passes muster because she sits on it. She gives me a pensive look, like she’s wracked with guilt. It’s “Sam, I have to tell you something.”

“What is it, sweetie?” I sit next to her and take her hand. Something’s eating her up.

“Amanda kissed me.”

Tires screech in my brain. “Hold on. She _kissed you_?”

“I stopped her, but…I’m so _sorry_ , Sam!” She lowers her head into her hands. “I’m so sorry.”

“Oh Lara.” I tug her head back up. It’s just like her to wrack herself with guilt over something like this. Life or death situation, but what gets her to freak out? Perceived cheating. “It’s not your fault! She’s the one that kissed a married woman.”

“But I liked it.”

“So she’s a good kisser. Lara, I’m not mad at you, you shouldn’t feel guilty. Mad at _her_. But not you. I do reserve the right to hit her first though.”

Lara nuzzles my hand with her cheek. “I wasn’t expecting it.”

“You get all the hotties. Myself included.” I give her a cheeky smile, then kiss her softly. If she’s so worried about someone else’s lips being on her, then I’m going to have to replace them with another memory of mine. Lara’s mouth opens slightly and I take advantage of that, straddling her and doing some exploration with my hands. I’m so scared of hurting her face that I don’t kiss her as hard I would normally.

Like a rubber band snapping, she grabs me and flips us around, until she’s got me pinned to the bed with her hips between my legs and her hands gripping my shoulders. I try to muffle a moan when her teeth nip at my neck. It’s like Lara is trying to make up for Amanda kissing her, and she _doesn’t_ have to but at the same time it’s _awesome_. Lara still wants me. She still needs me. Sometimes I’m scared she’ll find someone more her speed, like with Amanda, who’s on her same wavelength.

Her fingers push my top up, and she yanks my bra down so she can get at my breasts and fuck, just _fuck_! I somehow manage to gasp out something coherent. “You’re not going to just exhaust me and then leave in the morning.” At least that’s what I try to say.

“Do you want me to stop?” She lifts her head and gazes intently into my eyes. It’s a look that nearly sets me off right then and there.

“God no. But promise you won’t leave without me.”

“I love you.” Lara drags her nails up my thigh. “I promise.”


	24. Dreams and Shadows

Sam looks so peaceful when she’s sleeping. Ever since Himiko was stricken from her she doesn’t toss and turn as much. It occurs to me that ever since the island neither of us sleeps well very often. The nightmares became less frequent, but they never entirely abated and all the things we’ve been involved in since our trip to Costa Rica have only brought that back. And there are new nightmares besides. So it’s nice to see her fast asleep.

Last night was...It honestly hasn’t been like that since our honeymoon. After weeks of frustration, danger and my recent guilt I couldn’t help myself, I needed the outlet.

“I love you,” I whisper, kissing her forehead, before slipping out of bed. I have to catch up to Shaw. The man has _murdered_ for these artifacts. Something about the old hoax regarding their power when joined together has to be true. There are too many similarities despite the vast reaches of time and distance between each one for it all to be a coincidence. I _have_ to stop him, because lord only knows what a man like that will do with that kind of power. 

Looking ahead, I fear more for Sam than I do myself. But she’s right. I’m not going to be able to leave her behind, not unless she wants to stay. If I do it’ll ruin everything between us. And for all my worries about her, I’m the one who pushes myself harder and faster and farther. Some day, I won’t come home to her, or she’ll go home alone. I don’t know which will be worse for her, but as long as she’s alive that’s what matters to me. But I’m too selfish and I’ve grown dependent on her. The ‘right’ thing to do would be divorce, and cutting off all contact. But that ship sailed years ago.

I have no intention of dying in the process of stopping Shaw. I just don’t know how. Our plane is gone, I’ve lost most of my support team. I’m not a praying woman but I’m really worried about Kwesi. I dragged him into this mess and I’ll never forgive myself if they’ve killed him. I know he has family. I pick up my phone and there are six text messages and three voicemails from Leda.

_Soraya awake, asked about you. Let her know you’re both ok_

_Had to convince her she can’t go with. Easier said than done_

_I want to too but can’t leave her I’m sorry_

_hope you’re resting_

_Can’t sleep. Raya sleeping again_

_Tried to reach the captain. still no response_

The first voicemail is a recap on Soraya’s condition. In the second, Leda tells me to look into the Himalayas. Soraya seems convinced that we’ll find something there. The same place she explored with my parents. Where they died. Leda says that the mercenary had a dream. She says she’ll try to arrange us a ride and give us the information when she has it.

In the third voicemail, Leda is excited and a little panicked.

“Lara, they just rolled Kwesi in! He’s got several bullet wounds and is in critical condition but they won’t tell me any more on it. I’m going to pull some strings, and try to get his wife out here. I don’t know if he’ll make it but I’ll keep you posted.”

I lean my head against my phone. Slightly less to worry about. I know where he is and that pretty much confirms our theory on the plane. I’m more upset about the man, of course. I can always buy another plane and that may actually be prudent in the future. One a little less rickety and loud, though. Sam would want luxury but she’s already building me a ship. Which is something that still blows my mind, mind you.

There isn’t much to pack, everything is either hidden in the Land Rover or still packed in the bags we’d taken into the safe house. I sit on the bed and shake Sam’s shoulder.

She opens her eyes and sits up, looking around and then settling her gaze on me. “...you’re still here!”

“I find your faith in me reassuring.”

Sam smiles sheepishly. “Just worried you’d get it in your head to try to protect me.”

“It’s going to be dangerous,” I warn her. I’m torn on the idea. I like having her at my back, but at the same time I don’t want anything to happen to her. Like what happened to my mother. God, I just need to let myself _trust_ in her.

“No duh.” She kisses me on the cheek. “And you’re sweet for worrying but you need someone to keep an eye on you, and I’m that woman. Sam the babysitter.”

“I take umbrage that you think I need to be babysat!”

She starts to giggle. “Oh my god did you actually just use the word umbrage?”

“I used it ironically.”

Sam laughs again and gets out of bed. She’s starkers from last night, and just as gorgeous as she is every other time I’ve seen her. She’s put on some muscle definition, and collected a few new scars of her own over the past few years. I reach out to stroke one. The marks on her arms have faded today and they aren’t glowing. If that means that she’s lost her power, or it’s just dormant, I don’t really know. As long as she’s still my Sam, that’s all that matters to me.

I pull Sam closer, replacing my finger with my lips, sliding my hands down her thighs and she shivers at my touch. This beautiful woman _loves_ me. She knows me better than I know myself at times. We’re both opposite and the same. I scarcely deserve her.

“Lara, if you do that we’re never going anywhere.” She turns in my arms and I kiss her belly button. Sam’s fingers curl in my hair. “What’s gotten into you? I’m not complaining, but you’re handsy today.”

In other words, she’s usually the initiator. “God only knows what’s going to happen or where we’ll be in the next few days and weeks,” I remind her. She looks down at me and I tilt my head up to meet her eyes. “Sometimes I think I take you for granted. I’m just reminding myself of what I have to fight for.”

“Handsy _and_ romantic. Sweetie you’ve already got the goods but the goods don’t really mind the sweet talk. It’s still pretty early,” Sam says. She waggles her eyebrows at me comedically.

I smirk at her. “We’re just waiting on Leda to tell us when and where our ride is.”

“And just _how_ will we pass the time?”

I start to get up. “Well I do want to look through my father’s notes again.”

Sam shoves me back down. “Lara, you tease!”

I grab her hand and pull her into bed next to me. The feel of her body against mine is something to be relished and cherished. Her enthusiasm is exhausting, as always. Sam kisses along my rip cage, skipping over my scar and nipping just below it. Her hands and her lips prove she’s hell bent on making me forget everything that’s not her and I can feel that quivering of anticipation running through my limbs.

Naturally, that’s about when my phone rings. I gently tug at Sam’s hair while I stretch for it. “God, she could have waited ten more minutes.”

“I could keep going.”

For three whole seconds I actually consider that, before groaning frustratedly. “Just get dressed.”

Sam laughs and I answer the phone. “Leda?”

“Interrupting something?”

“Just Sam being Sam.” I get off the bed and hunt around for my knickers. It’s not the first time Sam has thrown them some place far out of reach, and while that’s kind of hot at the time it’s just really annoying the next morning.

“We can get you a flight to Lhasa today, but it’s not going to be cheap. There’s no way to carry any firearms, but I think we can get your bow and axe into the checked baggage as hiking accessories.”

“I’m not sure I like going in without at least a pistol, but we’ll have to take what we can get.”

Leda chuckles on the other end of the line. “There’s someone in Lhasa who’ll be able to help you with that.”

“Naturally. Message me the details. Is Soraya doing better?”

“She’s damn lucky. She’ll be stuck here awhile before we can get her flown home, but it is better than the alternative.”

“And Kwesi?”

“His wife is already on a plane. I bribed a nurse to find out his status. He’s out of surgery and resting, but they’re still unsure about his recovery.”

“Damn. Keep me posted, will you?”

“Of course. Lara, be careful, and trust your instincts.”

We say our goodbyes and hang up. I realize I’m still standing there completely nude and Sam has her _camera_ out. “Just _what_ are you doing?!”

“Private collection,” she says in complete seriousness, then turns the camera to show she’s watching and not recording. That’s a relief. She’s never been able to convince me to let her record our love-making but god know’s she’s tried. I don’t get why that would be at all fun. One time she left me a very erotic voicemail that turned me into a red, blubbering idiot at the library and that was too much as it was. “So I heard that right? They found Kwesi?”

“Secure in the knowledge that she’s not filming me unwittingly, I dress. “I’m going to stow the firearms here. Roth usually has a place for them, and a separate one for the ammunition.”

Sam affects Roth’s accent. “Because you never store ammo with your guns.”

“Precisely.” I lean in to give her a kiss, then walk out to the Land Rover. It’s a little chilly, but no one has messed with it. I suppose we’ll have to leave it behind. I fill Sam in on Kwesi and Soraya’s conditions as we pack, half-hoping it will convince her to stay behind. It only makes her more resolved.

It doesn’t really take that long to get the weapons stowed and then on the road. Sam plugs her camera into the DC outlet to keep it charged while I try to find the airport that Leda booked us the flight from. We have surprisingly little difficulty actually getting on board and no one seems to care about my bow and climbing axe. 

Three hours with little to do is enough to drive even myself mad. I try to sketch what I remember from my dream. The ritual circle. The optimal placement for the artifacts. Something bothers me about it though. There’s something missing. I can’t quite remember what the _center_ looked like. Many grooves, I think. The only thing grooves like that were typically used for is to direct the flow of some kind of liquid. Blood. More blood than we used in our own ritual. Perhaps enough to require some kind of sacrifice. Which makes sense. Animal sacrifice was a common thread across the ancient world. I have a sickening feeling that it’s not animal blood that Shaw will use.

Do all the grooves point to the center, from the artifacts? Or the other way around. I don’t know if the sacrifice stands at the center, or somewhere else and what ever accepts the power transfer is the center. Finding the answer to this question will help me devise a way to disrupt the ritual. I’ve no doubt that Shaw wants the power or knowledge these old souls possess. And he’d murder a thousand men to get it.

Sam watches me while I work, resting her head on my shoulder and letting me think this all through. I appreciate it. While I love her voice, I need some time to really dig in. There’s not enough room to spread out my notes or my father’s notes, but I try to make do. Once we land I probably won’t have enough time.

And I’m right. Once we land, we’re kept very busy. I acquire some new weapons. Nothing like Roth’s pistols. They feel wrong in my hands, but they’ll have to do. Leda’s contact couldn’t secure us anything more powerful than an old shotgun, but it’ll do. More important to our immediate needs are warm clothing, a tent and rations. We are really, truly roughing it in a way that neither of us have done in years. A part of me looks forward to it, as though it’s waking up from a long slumber.

We can’t leave until morning, so I leave Sam with the supplies and stop in for a visit with Dolma. We’ve talked on the phone fairly often but I haven’t seen her in person since my honeymoon. The apartment I supplied her is nice and clean, and she looks surprised to see me. The inside is more sparse than I’d expected, and I take a seat on a old but comfortable chair. The only decorations I see are assorted kinds of furniture and a painting of the mountains. I give the girl a critical look. Now that’s she’s better fed I can see that Sam is right, she’s older than I thought she was. She’d be seventh year at school back home. Maybe eighth. “Dolma, what _are_ you doing with the money I send you?”

The girl sits across from me, and fidgets nervously. “I don’t… well I do not really need that much. I have a place to sleep, and clean water and good food, but I have too much of it.”

I tilt my head, then reach out to touch her hand. “Do you help people with it?”

She nods, and her face lights up. “Yes. Some people are so hungry and I used to be so hungry. I cannot just...I have to help. So I buy a big meal for everyone every week, and I give them fruit in the morning. Are you mad?”

“No, Dolma.” I shake my head. “I’m not mad. That’s a very nice thing to do. To tell you the truth I don’t like having all that money either. I’d much rather see people get food who otherwise wouldn’t. Just be careful. I don’t want anyone taking advantage of you.”

“Did he guide you?” She asks suddenly, changing the subject. With her left hand she gestures to the north. “Because it’s time now.”

“Time now?” I follow the direction of her hand. “And just how do you know that.”

She rolls her eyes at me. “Because he said when you came back it would be time.”

“Who, my father?”

“No, the wolf.”

I slide my hand into my pocket and remove the wolf figurine. It’s pulsating, almost vibrating in my hand. Dolma takes it and holds it in the palms of her hands. “I never knew my father. It was just my mother and me, and that man sometimes. He was her friend. But he went into the mountains…”

“And he didn’t come back. I… saw it. In a dream.”

“Will you come back?”

The question startles me. Dolma’s eyes are wet, and she grips the wolf statue like it’s her last lifeline. “You didn’t have to help me, you didn’t have to do anything, but you did. I’ll never be able to thank you enough. Please come back.”

“I have no intention of getting lost in the mountains.” I take the wolf statue back. “And when this is all done, I’ll bring this back to you. I have plenty to remind me of my mother and father. You don’t have anything of your mother but this.”

That seems to satisfy her. She hops to her feet. “There’s something I want to show you!”

For a moment I’d forgotten she was still a child. I get up to follow her. She leads me to her bedroom. Inside is a bed that could fit at least six Dolmas, but that’s not what draws my eye. She has a wall filled with drawings, sketches and paintings. She’s clearly talented, and a little training and encouragement could go a long way with her. I stare at her as she digs through some papers. She recycles a lot, sketches on both sides of the paper. She’s used to scarcity of resources. Against another wall are some canvases and a new paint set. I’m reminded of my mother’s art room and I feel a pang of sadness.

“You’re very good, Dolma…” I’d already been wondering if I should take a hands off approach to begin with. But she has such _potential_. Just like Roth and my father saw in me. I _have_ to encourage her. 

“Here.”

She hands me a rolled up paper, and I carefully unroll it. It’s a sketch of myself and Sam. She gave me hard eyes, and she gave Sam a cheeky little smile. I’m at a loss for words.

“I wanted to draw the man, your father. But I couldn’t remember enough. I’m sorry.”

“No, no… this is _amazing._ ” I offer an arm for a hug. She hesitates, then steps in. I’m still stunned, so I just kiss the top of her head. “Thank you.” When I’d been her age, I’d been all alone except for Roth.

We get a late start the next day - I got distracted trying to find schools in the city that we could send Dolma to for her art. Sam not-so-subtly suggests we move her to England but I’m reluctant to uproot her. The culture shock alone could be a problem, and it isn’t like she couldn’t get a good education in her home country. While it might be nice to have her around, I want to do what’s best for her, not for me. And what’s best for her is being far, far away from me.

We run out of road after a few hours, and switch to a snowmobile. Sam helps me load it. “Why couldn’t we get a dog sled?”

“Wrong part of the world, though that might be fun to do sometime. The two of us on a dogsledding trip in the Yukon.” I’m teasing her, but she actually looks like she’s considering it. 

“Maybe we’ll do that for our anniversary. Get it in before the thaw but after the worse part of winter is over.”

“Sam, that almost sounds reasonable.”

I’m going on instinct as much as anything else. We’re not entirely lost because I have a general idea of where we’re going, from both my dream and from some of my father’s research. I expect it to take a couple of days through treacherous mountains. We could have hired guides. We have a GPS but they’d know the terrain better. The last thing I want to do is bring more people into harm’s way, so I never even brought it up.

It’s just me and Sam and our snowmobile, and when the snowmobile breaks down, we don’t even have that. I pitch our tent against the mountain, shielded from the wind and the cold as best as I can make it. We do our best to warm up and dry our clothes off.

Sam looks a little put out. She stares at the sleeping bags. “Damn, I was thinking we could get really cozy together in the sleeping bags, you know? But I’m too damn cold and tired for that.”

“Hell truly has frozen over.”

Sam throws her mittens at me. It’s pretty warm inside the tent, and with a little heater we don’t have to worry about freezing to death. I have supplies for making a fire, of course, should the heater break or we end up without a tent, but this little bit of luxury is welcome. She scoots in against me and I put my arm around her. I definitely can’t sleep.

“Can you believe we’ve only been married a couple of months.” Evidently, Sam can’t sleep either. She lifts her head up to look down at me. “Look at us. Finding ancient wonders, unlocking the secrets of the ancients, trying to save the world. I really think that Roth and your parents would be proud of you.”

Oh Sam. I stroke her face. “I like to think that they’d bless our marriage.”

“Well Roth did ask me my intentions remember?” 

“I remember you saying that, and I still refuse to believe it.”

She laughs. “It’s one hundred percent true.”

Sam lays her head back down on my chest, and I chuckle. “I wish I’d seen that.”

She doesn’t respond. Her breathing is already starting to get slower, but in a sleepy voice she asks, “Will Amanda be there?”

“I don’t know.” I squeeze her closer. “I hope not.”

“If she is?”

I close my eyes. If she helps Shaw. Or if she’s lost control of Himiko or some other artifact, I may not have a choice. “Then what happens depends on what she does.”

When I next open my eyes, I’m standing on a mountain. Something heavy slams into me and I’m tumbling down. I barely catch onto a ledge, my muscles straining in protest. Big hands with calloused fingers pull me up and I look into a face that haunted my nightmares for _months_ after Yamatai. “What…?”

Vladimir hits me, throwing me to the ground and jumping on top of me, pinning me. I can’t fight him, I can’t throw him off. He trails the flat of a knife down my cheek. “Scared little girl, nowhere to run, no fight in you.”

I don’t let him finish his sentence. Snapping me head forward I break his nose. He lets go of me and I kick him off. I grope for a weapon, and draw a pistol. “You already took my innocence, you bastard.” I put a hole in his head, then another, and a third and it’s _satisfying_. He was my first kill, the first push towards becoming the monster that hunted Solarii. “You have _no_ control over me!”

“Tell me, _girl_.” 

My skin crawls at the sound of Mathias’ voice. I turn, pointing the gun at him. “Oh don’t you start.” I pull the trigger, shooting him until he goes down. When I step past his body, he grabs my ankle.

The dead man rasps, “We’re all _monsters_ here.”

I pull away, disgusted. I just kick him and scale further up the mountain. At the top stands a Japanese woman in the finest white kimono. Her eyes though, are black, angry, and dead. She holds a thread between her fingers, and I realize it’s tied to my wrist. It goes on past her, through a massive graveyard and disappears into the fog. “Sam is at the other end, isn’t she. I know this legend. That’s a string I’m _never_ letting you cut.”

The Sun Queen shrieks, but I move faster. I empty the rest of the clip into her, and I keep pulling the trigger as she goes down. It just clicks until I realize that it’s empty. I toss it away. I have to follow this thread, I have to find Sam. Like so many of my nightmares, I have to find her. My worst nightmares are when I don’t find her in time.

The graveyard has hundreds of graves. Some of them I know. Alex. Roth. Mathias. But so many of them are nameless. Carved into each is a face, each more despondent or more agonized than the last. Every man and woman I’ve killed in one long line stretching before me. And I remember, I’ve kept _count_. Every grave is a mark on my soul, and the more graves I pass, the more I’m certain something dark awaits me.

Vladimir and Mathias and Himiko fade away to the recesses of memory. The graves lead to a hill, and at the top of the hill is a single tombstone. No. “No..!”

I rush up the hill and kneel in front of it, there’s no name, no face, and the earth is not disturbed.

“I don’t know if that’s supposed to be me or you.”

I jump, and then turn. It’s Sam, and she runs into my arms. “Oh thank god.”

Behind her are her own graves. Dozens. Much less than mine but still too, too many. She holds up her hands and they’re slick with blood. Understanding doesn’t require words. I lead her to a nearby stream, and help her wash them. We scrub each others’ hands raw in that water, until Sam sags against me, her body wracked with sobs.

“They’ll _never_ be clean again.”

“No, not entirely.”

She looks at me, face streaked and grateful for my honesty.

Nearby, the grave starts to sink into the ground, and then the ground crumbles out from beneath us, but we don’t fall. Far below is a glistening city of golden spires and glass monoliths. Stepped pyramids made of silver melt as rivers of lava run through the streets, and one giant structure shatters as it falls. A massive, Giza-style golden pyramid is rapidly sinking at the top of a long avenue.

The ground in the center gives way and the pyramid is lost. There’s darkness there. Utter black, filled with countless stars with a thousand eyes intently focused on _us_. The island splinters, rising up and then collapsing into the ocean. Somehow, above it all, I can hear people _screaming_. With a terrible roar the sea rushes in to bury the city and everyone left alive.

Sam screams, and I’m upright and armed before I’m even fully awake. But she’s laying in her sleeping bag, and we’re alone. “Sam… Are you all right?”

She wipes at her eyes. “I had this… terrible dream. There were all these graves. Like the people I’ve killed, and then Himiko was trying to drown me and then I ran into you and the world collapsed and there was this city....”

“And people were screaming as it collapsed into a void,” I finish for her.

She stares at me. “That really _was_ you. What the hell does it mean?”

Sam is just accepting this, no questions. We’ve shared that dream, or that vision. “I don’t know, but it has to be related to what Shaw is doing. Whatever forces these artifacts tap into…”

“I saw them in another dream. They were in that city. Spoils of war or recovered relics or something but I don’t know what. And this woman who was summoning...something really terrible. Something right out of a Lovecraft story.”

“Either those artifacts are what destroyed the city, or they’re remnants with the power or knowledge to summon that darkness again. Either way, he has to be stopped.”

“Well, I’m so not sleeping now.”

I feel energized. Adrenaline, or fear, or excitement. All of the above. “Lets pack up and get moving.”


	25. Bones in the Snow

After that nightmare there’s just no getting back to sleep. Even worse, the snowmobile won’t start, so we have to make choices on what to carry. Weapons and food and things to stay warm with. I don’t know much much farther we have to go but Lara seems to have an idea. She marks the location of the snowmobile and tent on a map, just in case. We abandon the tent and wrap as much as we can in Lara’s sleeping bag for ease of carry. I help too, and even though it’s heavy I don’t want to risk not having even half these things, so I try to stuff as much as I can stand to carry in my own backpack. The worse snow we ever were in was this one time in Colorado and we’d been in a really nice cabin. Looking back I wonder how things would have gone if we’d confessed our feelings then. Probably not that much different, I think. We’d just have had another year or so together which would have been nice, and making out in front of the fire would be fun. I study her face as she finishes packing. It’s completely sappy, but I feel like we really were meant to be.

Once we have our snowshoes on, Lara ties a rope around her waist and then hooks it around me. It’s not even snowing but I really don’t mind because I don’t want to get lost out here, not without her. On my own I’m a dead woman. I’d last like five minutes, tops. The worse part is the silence. It’s too much work to talk while we’re trudging on the snow, even with the snowshoes. A year ago I don’t know if I could have kept up as easily, but I’ve totally got abs now and I can totally do this. I’m not going to be a drag on Lara. She’s probably in enough pain as it is from what Alisha and the Russians did to her.

We’re off to save the world. Or something. Stop something _bad_ from happening, anyway. What could Shaw do with this power and this knowledge? More wars, more hurting people, and god only knows what he’d unleash on accident. More of those creatures I guess. That giant void thing with all those stars and eyes is another guess. I have this vivid vision of it opening up beneath London, Tokyo or New York and it’s terrifying. Mother fucking kaiju would be better because at least then you can punch them with a robot. A void. The thing looked just like the eyes of the pale creatures that keep trying to kill us.

You know, throwing money at a problem isn’t a bad idea when you have enough money and a direction to point it at. Not that I think building robots will actually help, but maybe I can hire the right kind of people to look in the right places. There’s only a half-dozen of us, really. If you count everyone. We’re really stretched thin and we need to build some kind of network. I stare at Lara’s back. We need to find people we can trust, and people like that are rare. Because we kind of screwed up with Amanda. She worked her way into our lives, she wormed her way past Lara’s barriers. I’ll be looking extra hard at people we meet in the future.

But the more I think about it the more I like the idea. I mean I’m building Lara a ship, but we’ll need contacts and suppliers and shit. Soraya obviously has a ton, and then there’s Winston, who was obviously a lot more involved in Richard Croft’s business than he lets on. I make a note to talk to them about this kind of thing. I know it’ll take money greasing palms. Throwing money at the problem. And money is something I have a lot of. I mean the ship is kind of my wedding present but why should I stop there? 

Oh man. I’m having all kinds of plans now. It’s exciting. Looking to the future, thinking about what we can do after we take a break. And I’m making Lara take a break. She’ll want to throw herself back out there but she can’t keep doing that. We’re taking a vacation. Of course, knowing us, we’ll just discover some other new terror filled ruin to explore. Which is where having a network of people to help out comes into play. And even then, Lara can’t be everywhere at once, but if we hire people we can trust to check out some of these places, Lara can check into what she really wants to see most.

Lara pauses and looks around, then consults her GPS. I don’t know if she’s lost, or just getting her bearings, but she puts it away and turns in another direction. West, I think. There’s this expanse of white, with mountains towering all around us. I’d thought that the wind would be less cold with the mountains sheltering us. But nope, it’s even _worse_. It blows angry and bitter and frigid, going through my clothing like I’m not even wearing any. The rocks just direct it like a wind tunnel.

“Are we there yet?”

“Are you serious?” Lara turns to look at me, and rolls her eyes when I grin back at her. “Actually, I think we’re close. I remember this.” She trails her hand along the rock face, searching for an entrance or a secret keyhole or something.

“Maybe next time we could save the world in the tropics. On a nice cruise ship in the Caribbean.”

“I’ll make sure to tell the next person who takes advantage of supernatural events to do so where you can have drinks with umbrellas in them.”

We don’t see the cave until we’re right up to it. Lara freezes, staring at it and I nearly run into her. “Sweetie?”

“This..is it. This is where my parents died.” She braces herself, and enters without me having to prod her. I pull my camera out to film. There’s some runes and markings on the inside, and I get a good shot of those. Most of them look familiar, mostly from other places we’ve been, but there’s one that looks like what I saw on crests and banners in my weird dreams. Great. Lara glances at me and I nod at her. 

Lara doesn’t say anything else, just quietly lights a torch and leads me deeper. Soon enough, we have to cross a river of that black water. Lara sighs and stares down at a bridge someone had left behind. “They’re already here.”

I test it with my foot and it seems sturdy. “I don’t want to take a dip in that, so lets be careful.”

We cross carefully, and I squeeze her hand once we reach the other side. “It’s not too late. Just...call that a gut feeling, I guess. I can feel Himiko. She’s like this..static buzzing in the back of my head and it’s getting louder.”

“They’re already in the chamber.” Lara pats the kris in her belt. “He recognizes some of them.”

Lara starts to turn right, but something catches her eye and she takes the left fork instead. I follow her down a long tunnel. It gradually gets more and more cramped, but I can see something metallic glinting at the end. It’s clearly a dead end, and I don’t know what Lara’s thinking or what she saw.

I’m not expecting the skeletons.

It’s like the sort of thing you’d see in an Indiana Jones movie. Two bodies leaning against one another, wearing the tattered remains of winter clothing. Their boots looked expensive. One is clearly made for a woman. My breath catches in my throat. There’s only two people these could possibly be. “Lara…”

Lara lifts her hand to her mouth, and she starts to shake. She just drops to her knees, one hand still over her mouth and the other reaching towards the bodies. It just hangs there in the air for a few moments. I kneel behind her. They must have crawled here after whatever went down with Shaw. How long did they have left together? What were they thinking about in their final moments? From what Lara had said they were both in serious trouble when the dream had faded. Part of her had probably hoped they’d somehow made it.

She leans forward, gingerly unclasping a watch from her father’s wrist. The leather strap is faded and brittle from age and the cold, and the glass is foggy but intact. Her father’s name is clearly engraved on the bottom as she turns it over to look at it. Confirmation. Lara’s shoulders tremble and I know she needs to cry but she won’t. I touch her. “Lara. Honey. We’ll come back for them. Take them home and give them a proper rest. But right now we have to stop Shaw.”

“We are Crofts,” she says, voice unsteady. “It’s what they would do. I never wanted to…” She gestures at their bodies helplessly, then reverently puts the watch in her pocket. “I guess this is it, then. They really are gone. No more tiny hopes that one day they’d come back. That they were just hiding, or lost somewhere.”

There’s a necklace on her mother. A pendant and I’m pretty sure it’s the kind with pictures in it. Okay this is kind of gross and creepy, but I don’t want to leave it, so I carefully pull it over my mother-in-law’s head. “I know she’d want you to have this. In case something happens and we can’t get back in here.” I don’t know if there’s any other jewellry but I’m not looking. I mean technically my engagement ring was Amelia’s but that wasn’t taken off of her _corpse_.

Lara nods. “I’ll open it later, I’m not sure I can handle what’s inside right now. Can you hold onto it for me?”

I stuff it inside my jacket. “Of course.” She doesn’t have as much from her mother. There’s that art room we never go into. Amelia Croft liked to paint and do sculpture - and Lara freaking about Dolma’s art suddenly makes a ton more sense. But I don’t think Lara ever really got a chance to mourn her mother. She focused on her father and blamed him for so much.

She gets to her feet, favoring her parents one last, long look before turning back down the tunnel. I hurry after her - it really feels like we’re being watched. Did their spirits get stuck here, like Setsuko’s back in Japan? I’m not going to die here, I’m not going to haunt these tunnels. We’re not going to have two generations of this family die in the same place, even if I have to drag Lara out with my teeth. 

We creep down the other tunnel, and the sound of chanting reaches my ears. It quickly grows louder. It’s not like the ritual we did with Mehit, or what Shaw had been doing on the oil rig. It’s an older, more primal chant. A chill runs down my back. It sounds a _lot_ like the chant I’d dreamed about, deep beneath that city, where the priestess had summoned that monster from the void. The _High Priestess_ , something tells me. 

I grab Lara’s arm. She glances at me, stone faced. Right. Okay. Totally in killer instinct mode. I give her thumbs up and scoot back a bit. She nods at me, then readies her bow. I give her another few seconds to move ahead, then I follow again. I don’t want her worrying about me, but I also want to watch her back, and I think I need to make sure we get this whole thing recorded.

The … ritual chamber, I guess, is gigantic. Bigger than any place I’ve seen yet. The walls glitter with gold and silver and a dozen different kinds of gems and stones. It all kind of leads the eye to a massive stone throne at the other side. There’s a golden skull attached to it. Like it’s been stuck there for ten thousand years. The freakiest part of the skull are the eyes. They’re different from the other ones like they’re black and filled with stars.

But then there are the bodies, three men laying around a circle in the same partitioned shape as the one carved near the entrance. The ritual circle that Lara talked about looks exactly like the crest of that fallen city. The rune carved at the entrance to the cave, and into the figurine Lara’s father kept in his study.

The men have bled out, the thick red liquid filling the grooves and forming a line between the throne, and all the other artifacts that Shaw has laid out. Linking them. I have the weirdest thought, but the blood basically acts like the metal in a circuit. Same thing - transferring energy and information.

He’s got four guards, and Giovanna is standing farther back, holding Himiko’s sword.. I don’t see Amanda anywhere and it’s kind of a relief. That’s one thing we don’t have to deal with. There’s enough going on between Lara’s parents and stopping Shaw without throwing our conflicted feelings about the Great Betrayer into it.

That relief kind of fades when I get my first real good look at Shaw. He’s dressed in an ill-fitting suit, and has painted, in blood, arcane symbols on his hands and face and his whole body is glowing from this eerie purple light. Lets be real, it’s kind of a funny sight because he just looks like he doesn’t belong. I can’t really laugh. Not after everything he’s done. Not when he’s trying to do this right in front of us. Not when there’s this whirlwind of light around him and the sound of souls screaming.

I don’t know what Lara’s planning. I don’t think she has time for more than one shot before his guards do something and god only knows if she’d even _hit_ Shaw. If it’s anything like the Sun Queen it might just deflect off of him. Lara looks like she’s thinking the same thing. She draws back her bowstring, and aims. I’m going to have to review the footage later because everything happens so fast once she lets go. The arrow hits one guard in the throat and the next two guards drop as Lara shoots them with her gun. I count like four shots and then it’s just us, the last guard, Shaw, and Giovanna.

And you know how some people can be like ‘I’ve made a terrible mistake?’ Because we’ve made a _terrible_ mistake. The blood from Shaw’s guards flows into the circle, and it’s like that’s all he needed. Just that extra bit of blood and the glowing goes into overdrive. There’s this thrumming sound. The sword on Giovanna’s hand starts to crackle from the energy, even through the sheathe. The ritual circle itself starts to shine like the sun.

Lara ducks into cover as the last guard opens fire on her. She’s pinned down so I try to sneak around behind him. I can club him and then we’d just have to deal with Shaw going super-saiyan. It’ll be cake.

“Where do you think you’re going, sweetie.” Giovanna’s voice. She mocks me, her tone all fake sweetness. I turn and catch her fist with my face. My ears rings, but I’ve been wanting to rip her apart for a month. I launch at her, hitting her in the nose and trying to get my nails into her eyes. I want this bitch to _suffer_.

She knees me in the stomach, and I grab her leg, twisting it. We both go down, my camera skidding across the ground. I claw my way up her torso and bring my fist down as hard as I can on her face. Her nose gives way and she jabs me in the throat, then shoves me off. I stumble and roll, gagging. I’m struggling to breath, but then there’s the sound of thunder and it’s like the lights go out.


	26. The Rock and the Storm

Seeing my parents like that cuts through me like a knife. This is the final proof that they are actually gone and they’re never coming back. Whatever tiny hope my heart had clung on to dies when I see my father’s name on the inside of his watch.

I thought I’d put them both behind me. I thought I’d moved on. But I hadn’t. I still haven’t, not until I can bring them home and bury them. Maybe I won’t feel closure, not even then, but it’s the right thing to do. 

My mind is still reeling and my emotions are too close to the surface for my liking, but I have to act now, while there’s still a chance. I lead Sam towards the chamber. Shaw has already started. Energy washes over him and there’s a sound like cloth being torn, only it’s happening over and over and I swear I hear distant, echoing screams.

Three men sacrificed for his cause and four more either guarding him or waiting to be used. Do they even care? Do they think they’re not expendable? Or are they paid so much that it doesn’t matter to them. Either way, their fate is sealed.

One arrow, four bullets, and the odds are a lot more even. The last guard, he’s a good shot. I feel the burning of the bullet as it clips my shoulder and I use that pain to fuel me. Sam is scrambling to get behind him but Giovanna intercepts her. I have to trust her. No panic, no worry, just trust in Sam to protect herself. She’s done a good job so far. Even two years ago I don’t think she would have made it this far with me. So I focus on the guard. He’s the real danger right now. He steps too close to an artifact and the kris strapped to my thigh throbs. My eyes fall on the ruby skull. 

I draw the knife and look at it. This knife craves blood, it craves death and the rending of human flesh. What happens if it gets added to the circle? Shaw already looks like he can’t handle this. Rush in, slice everyone, relish it. I _crave_ it. No. _No_. I’m not letting the bloodlust consume me again. I have a better idea.

When the guard stops firing long enough to see if I’m still here, I dart out from cover and throw the dagger. It imbeds itself in the man’s chest. He convulses and collapses on top of the ruby skull. There’s a flash of light and the crackling of electricity just before the entire chamber goes dark. One of two things should happen. Either the weapon is sated by the blood pooling in the circle, or the added power will overwhelm Shaw.

The light returns. With the glow from Shaw and from the circle returned, it’s obvious that we’re no longer alone. Lining the walls are a dozen of the same creatures that have hounded us since Peru. The same creatures that killed my parents and that I sometimes even see when I close my eyes at night. I _hate_ them. I hate them so much it’s difficult to think straight.

Sam gets to her feet and I pull her over to me. I shove a gun in her hand and flick the safety off. She presses her back to mine and I can feel her heart race in time with mine. I draw another knife and hold the flat of the blade against my arm. My voice is steady. Much steadier than I feel. “Trust your instincts. Whatever happens, _trust your instincts_.”

We barely have time to exchange any other words. The creatures surge forward. I blast one to mist with a shot, but a second gets in close. I twist towards a third and Sam shoots the second. I never knew how hard it is to trust someone until now. How terrifying. How _freeing_. We’ve always had to rely on each other. In University I was Sam’s rock, and Sam was the storm that shook me loose from my self-imposed emotional exile. On Yamatai she was the _reason_ I found to survive. 

After the island she became my focus, to keep me going when my mind wanted to break. I was always Sam’s rock to hold on to. Sam can always rely on me to protect her but somewhere along the way she learned to swim with the current. To take control of her own fate. Now I have rely on her to help protect us both because if I have to do this alone, we both die.

I’m less my mother’s grace nor my father’s measured movements. He’d been clinical with his aim, each movement calculated and thought seconds out ahead of time. I’ve some of that, yes, when I’m the hunter in the forest. But in a melee like this I’m more Conrad Roth’s brutal efficiency. Destroy them, beat them, win at any cost so long as we both make it out alive. Roth was a brawler, with fists and knives, and almost cowboy with his guns. 

Sam moves like a dancer. She has the blood of the Sun Queen in her veins. She has years of clubs, years of primal, rhythmic movement. If my mother fought with classical grace, Sam fights like a modern siren. I’ve shown her how to shoot, I’ve even shown her how to fight with a knife, but I’ve never shown her anything like this.

I step to the side, shooting past Sam at a target while she covers the other direction. Still they come, swarming us and crowding us but there’s no slash at my back, and I allow none to reach Sam. There’s a brief lull and I have time to think. Is my mother’s spirit helping Sam? Are my father and Roth guiding my hand? Or is this just us in synch, two souls bound as one?

The last of our ammunition is spent. Our guns click uselessly. Black mist rises at our feet, spreading and filling the whole of the chamber. Sam’s gun clatters to the ground and she whispers, “Jesus.”

“Sam?”

“If this is some kind of ‘we’re gonna die so I have to confess how much you’ve always meant to me’ thing you can stuff it.”

Chuckling, I shake my head. “No. I just wanted to tell you you’ve...You’re... I’m proud of you.”

She grins tiredly. “I might have picked up some moves from an expert.”

My ears are still ringing, but I face Shaw and Giovanna. It doesn’t look like he’s handling the power very well. I don’t know if it’s the extra blood or the mist or just all the artifacts gathered in one place, but Shaw’s is pale and drawn. He’s lost much of his weight and his skin hangs off his bones like his loose suit. There’s something whirling around him. It’s like a torrent of souls surrounding him and I’m positive I can’t enter the circle. The Kris is in the guard’s chest still, but I can’t reach it past the torrent.

Maybe I can try reason. I so rarely get to try reason. “Shaw, stop this! It’s killing you!”

His voice sounds like gravel under a boot. “I can see…. _everything_...!”

Sam throws up her hands. “You’re trying to take too much! A container only _holds_ so much!” 

Shaw just stares off into nothingness. Perhaps he’s looking into the abyss. The grouned rumbled and I glance around. It’s like we’re no longer inside that temple ruin. Stretching high above us is the night sky, with it’s countless stars. It’s beautiful, unpolluted by city lights. The constellations don’t look quite right though. It’s not that they’re the wrong hemisphere.

It’s the wrong _time_. The ground grumbles again. We don’t have much time. There _has_ to be a way to disrupt this, a way to stop Shaw from gaining this power. Sam’s words come back to me. _A container only holds so much._

“Sam, you’re a genius!” He’s drawing from the skulls and the other artifacts, and now the Kris is added to that and it’s almost too much for him. But he’s _not_ drawing from Himiko. The sword of the Sun Queen is laying on the ground where Giovanna last dropped it.

She notices where my eyes go, and we both move at the same time. I dive forward, elbowing her aside and grasping the hilt. I smash it into her head and charge towards Shaw, dropping the sheathe as I go. There’s no wind to stop me here, but something still pushes me back. I can hear the screaming better now. A dozen languages, most of them long fallen out of use. Himiko is cursing in my head. I can hear the kris, truly hear him for the first time. A man, and the things he’s done are the stuff of nightmares. I’m sickened by how I let that thing use me.

Shaw panics. He holds his hands up to me and I feel a pressure in my head. His voice is raspy. “What are you doing? Stop! This is mine!” 

“Like any other old man you’re clinging to power for the sake of power. It’s not yours. It’s not mine, or anyone’s!” The sword cuts through his chest with unsurprising ease. It should have been harder. It should have made me feel worse, but it’s like severing a string. One moment he’s alive, and there’s power coursing through him and the next he’s gone. The power flows through _me_ instead. Lightning cracks, a loud bang that echoes through the chamber and Himiko is released into the torrent of souls.

My body convulses as I’m lifted into the air. There’s a cacophony of voices, the same ones as before but they’re so _clear_ now. The sound of water rushes in my ears and I’m filled to the brim and then overflowing. There’s too much, too many thoughts and it’s all _too_ fast! 

I quickly lose hold of myself. Of Lara Croft. My dreams and my life wash away in the flood but I can understand _so much more_. _Ten thousand years of history_ cascade before me. Countless questions answered in an instant. I see the rise and fall of empires. First discoveries. The collapse of Atlantis and the seeding of a people throughout the world. The birth of myth and the passing of legend. Mesopotamia, China, Greece, Persia, India. They turn through my mind like the pages of a book. Nok, Ghana, Egypt, Peru. Excalibur and the hammer of Thor. The lost city of Z. A thousand more stories and histories from every corner of the earth.

I trace the lineage of a priestess from a sunken empire to the Sun Queen and all the way to Sam.

Someone breaks the circle. I drop like a lead weight, landing on the ground as the threads I’m following rush away from me. It’s gone! It’s all gone! My voice sounds like it it is coming from someone else. Foreign to my ears. Echoey. “No..no! I saw _everything_!” 

I try to lift my head, blinking away tears. Out of my periphery, I see Giovanna moving. She’s nudging the artifacts out of the circle, breaking the spell, ending the ritual. Beneath the golden skull she places an artifact I haven’t seen before. It looks like a carved dragon.

She chants something. There’s the crack of thunder and then I’m being flooded again. I catch a name in the current. _Fiammetta_. Giovanna’s sister. Amanda’s _lover_. Giovanna is trying to bring her sister _back_. Through _me_. But Fia is resisting. She wants this about as much as I do. I can’t see her face, but I can hear her voice. I can hear her _pleading_. The energy of her soul whirls around me and through me, exposing everything to both our eyes. All that I’ve done, the people I’ve hurt and the shadows that hound me. I try to focus on the dragon perched on the ancient throne. I try to _fight_.

_Help me free me._

_How? If I destroy the artifact you could cease to exist._

_It’s okay. I’ll be okay. Tell her I’ll be okay._

All my strength is taken by the effort to retain myself. Its nearly impossible and after being exposed to countless secrets I’m almost afraid I’ve lost myself. But if I can get to the dragon I can destroy it. “She doesn’t… _want_ this.”

I don’t know if Giovanna hears me. If she does, she ignores it, raising her voice in the same ritual that Mathias had once tried on Sam.

“Giovanna, stop! She doesn’t …” Pain lances through my chest and hammers pound inside my skull and I can’t think of words anymore. I hear my voice screaming, but it sounds far away.

Blood spreads on the front of Giovanna’s jacket. The point of a sword pushes out from her chest. Giovanna grabs onto it, her voice fading with a sickening gurgle. She slides off the sword, and onto the ground in front of the throne. Sam is standing over her, the sword in her hand. She stares at it, then at Giovanna’s body. I can’t read what’s in her eyes. She throws the sword away and rushes to my side. “Lara! Lara can you hear me? Is it you?”

I sag against her, exhausted. “You saved me. Does that make us even?”

“You get to save me next time.”

“God, I hope there’s not a next time.” I pat her hand. “Help me up. There’s still time to free all of them. While the residual energy is still present.”

“How?” Sam lets me lean on her. My strength is returning quickly, but I let her mother-hen me. After what she did… she needs to focus on something else. There’s a great deal of difference between killing someone at a distance and stabbing them through the back.

“Smash the lot of them.”

“I thought you said that would be bad?”

I smile and nudge her towards one of the skulls. “I learned a few things while she was trying to tear me out of my own body. If we destroy the artifacts here, their souls will be free. Though to be blunt, many scarcely deserve that peace.”

Sam kicks the sapphire skull into the wall, shattering it. “Don’t care, smashing them all. And I’m going to _enjoy_ it.”

I let her work out the past year of frustration on the artifacts and walk to the throne. The golden skull seems to regard me with curiosity and some familiarity. I hesitate. There’s still so much I could learn. It’s on the tip of my tongue, the edge of my memory. Vast knowledge has passed out of reach but I can still reclaim it. The skull beckons. There’s a way. There’s always a way...

“Shit…” Before I’m intoxicated further, I smash it with my axe, then pick up the dragon figurine. “All this history lost. But it should never have been found. Be free, Fia.”

“Put her down!”

Amanda has the sword now. It no longer hums or buzzes with energy. The act of shoving it into the circle has finally rid us of the Sun Queen, but it’s no less sharp. She points the sword at me. It’s shaking in her hand and she has a familiar look of desperation in her eyes. “ _Put her down_.”

How long has she even been here? I don’t know how much of this she’s watched but she can’t possibly want to bring Fia back by sacrificing someone else. “Amanda, she’s being _tortured_ in this thing. She doesn’t _want_ this. We can set her free, but you have to let her go. The _only_ way to bring her back is by sacrificing people. Is that what she’d want? To kill people and steal someone else’s body?”

“Give me the dragon. Just give Fia to me. I’ll figure it out. There has to be a way.” She advances closer, and I move to put the throne between the two of us. There’s that crevice behind it, hidden in the shadows and I nearly fall into it. My position is suddenly more precarious than it had been just a moment ago. I’d forgotten about that chasm.

“I’m sorry.” I throw the figurine against the wall. It shatters. Relief and thankfulness flood the chamber, and then Fia is gone. Screaming, Amanda rams herself into me. My feet slip on the edge of the crevice and we fall. 

I catch the lip with my left hand and grab Amanda’s right wrist with my other. There’s a gaping darkness beneath us, stark contrast to the rage and heartbreak on her face. My arms ache, and she’s still holding onto the sword. “Amanda, hold on!”

Madness and grief burns in her eyes. “You killed her! She was all I had left and you _killed_ her!”

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry about Fia but she _asked_ me to! It’s what she wanted. To be free, to move on to the other side. You’ll see her again, but not today. Do you understand me? Let go of the sword and use me to climb out!”

Sam’s head appears above us. “Amanda, you’ve got _us_. Lara’s right, you need to let yourself grieve and move on.”

“We can help you.” That’s easier said than done. It took me a long time to accept what happened to the Endurance crew. They’d haunted me for months and sometimes that old pain still returns but Amanda needs to let herself go through that. I start to pull her, but she’s completely dead weight. “Work with me a little.”

Amanda looks down into the darkness, and when she looks up at me again there’s resolve on her face. “You’re just like her. No fucking wonder I....”

“We need to climb up. I can’t hold on, I need you to help!”

Sam disappears from view. “Hold on, I think I can find a rope!”

Amanda seems to realize that we’re _not_ going to give up on her. I’m not going to let go and I’m going to keep prodding her until she helps me save her life or we both fall. “You’ve got this perfect life with this perfect wife. You took that away from me. Remember this, Lara. Every stolen moment with Sam, every _breath you take_ is a gift from me.”

She swings the sword up and then Amanda is falling, gone out of sight and I’m left holding her hand. I let it go, so stunned I almost lose my grip on the crevice too. I could have saved her. She didn’t have to _do_ that! 

She didn’t have to do that.

****

-

Lara’s face fades into the darkness. I fall forever. At least it feels like I do. It’s too dark to see what I’ve done to my arm. I can still _feel_ it. Even move my fingers. But that’s just the shock talking.

I’m not expecting the impact or the cold water. It sweeps the sword away but I’m too busy trying to claw for purchase, to grab hold of something. It’s exhausting work. Maybe I should just give up. Fia’s gone. Lara...just thinking of her face fills me with spite and loss. Lara’s an idiot for caring. I’m an _idiot_ for caring. I hate her I hate her I _hate_ her.

A hand grabs me by my good arm and pulls me out of the water. A voice whispers in my ear, but I’m too busy vomiting up water to understand what it says. There’s a softly glowing light here as I drag myself to my feet. My right arm is in agony. I don’t need to see it to know what I did and I try not to look at it. But I’m supposed to be _dead_.

“Oh child. It is not yet your time.”

A figure steps out of the darkness, holding the sword of the Sun Queen. A woman with skin like brass or bronze, garbed in a form-fitting gown the colors of the sunset. Symbols are painted or carved into her body, and her face is angular, almost inhuman. She has hair like silver-spun gold. 

She stretches bat-like wings high towards the vaulted cavern, then surrounds me with them. She presses the tip of the sword under my chin to force me to look at her. She’s clearly the source of the glow, and within the winged cocoon the shadows dance on her face. She takes my right arm and it starts to itch.

I mean to look, I’m enraptured by her eyes. They’re like staring at the moon. Her voice is like _honey_ and whether she’s speaking in my mind or to my ears I can’t tell.“Tell me _all_ about this new world of yours. I’ve slumbered a _very_ long time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End...
> 
> But don't worry, there's an epilogue and Lara and Sam will definitely return after that!


	27. Epilogue

**Sam**

It doesn’t feel over. I mean I know it’s over. Shaw is dead. Giovanna is dead. Amanda is… dead. Maybe that’s why things still feel like they’re things. We never got to hear the full story. How Shaw trapped Fia’s soul, how Amanda and Giovanna got mixed up in all of that. I never even got to hear how that Italian bitch got her _scar_ and that’s going to bother me forever.

Lara didn’t talk much for awhile, though I eventually got her to open up. She arranged for her parent’s bodies to be brought home, and Leda used some of Soraya’s contacts to take care of Shaw and dispose of what’s left of the artifacts. I don’t want us ending up in jail. It was self-defense but not many juries are gonna believe it, no matter how much video I have. I’m not even sure how I’m going to _handle_ that. I mean we’re kind of maybe _blatantly killing people_. But I’ll figure it out. I feel like the story needs to be completed, for Amanda’s sake.

Leda said the chasm that Amanda fell into was pretty deep and there’s no hope of recovering her body. The location is too remote to bring in the equipment they’d need. I feel a little empty. I keep thinking about it. About what I’d have done. What if that had been Lara in that relic? God knows what I’d do to get her back. Screw over the world if I had to. Even if she hated me for it, but I would have done it to save her. If that makes me a terrible person? I don’t care. I know what Lara would do. That just means she’s a better person than me.

But there’s still something we have to do. It’ll give us some closure and then we can move on. I’d really like to move on. I’d really like _Lara_ to move on.

It’s spring again when we land in Japan, a whole year after we got married. It’s just the two of us. Jonah is still in Hawaii. He hadn’t taken the news about Amanda very well. Even if she’d used him, he’d still fallen for her and it’s hard when it’s this double whammy of betrayal and death. Soraya and Leda are watching the mansion and Lara might just let them stay with us. It’s nice to have a family, and we’ve had a bond forged by shed blood. Like even though they’re both older than us I _kind_ of want to adopt them. The four of us, and Jonah as one big family. I’m pretty sure Reyes is going to stay way the fuck away, but Alisha still wants to do stuff with Lara so we’ll see how all that works out.

We follow the same road to the same little ryokan we’d stayed at a year ago. The cherry blossoms are in bloom, a soft breeze rustling through them as we pull up. There’s a new face to greet us, and I’m a little saddened. Natsumi Kimura is gone, but there’s still a welcoming presence in the air. We follow it, down the old path and over the bridge near where we’d gotten some cherry blossoms in hard to explain places.

Lara is subdued, so I take her hand, threading our fingers together and gradually a smile forms on her face as her shoulders relax. Maybe she’s letting some of her burdens go. I hope so.

The cave is the same as we’d left it. The air is heavy and the breeze is gone as we step inside. Lara lets out a relieved sigh when we see the memorial. It’s a little dustier, without Natsumi to keep it clean, but there’s still a presence here. It’s warm and it’s welcoming and it stirs something that’s like hope in my chest. I grin at Lara and tug her over to the memorial. “So what do we do, sweetie? Something tells me a blood ritual won’t work here.”

“No blood. And I don’t think we can just break it, Sam. It’s not like the others. I think she just needs a push.”

Well pushing it over would break it so that’s obviously not what she means. I fold my arms and look it up and down. “She died looking for a star to bring back to Natsumi, right? So what if we free her by completing her goal? I don’t think she ever thought of that.”

“We can’t very well get a star,” Lara points out. She taps her chin, and then smiles. “But I have an idea.”

Her idea involves a long drive to a nearby town and spending several hundred pounds on a telescope and assorted odds and ends. She directs me in assembling her device in the cave, while she positions the telescope at the mouth. As it takes shape I start to get the idea. The telescope will show us the stars, and there’s a prism and mirrors that will then reflect the light of a star right onto the main part of the shrine.

“Do you think it’ll work?”

“We’ll find out in an hour.” Lara rests her hand on my shoulder. “And maybe the thought will count.”

She walks back to the telescope and I lean against the cave wall. For the first time since the Himalayas Lara seems to be lighter. Happier. The thing about being married to a Croft is understanding that they don’t always act the way most people do. 

They grieve hard, and in private, locking everything inside and letting it bat at them like a storm while pretending that everything is okay. But everything isn’t okay. She’s got her parents to grieve over all over again. Then there’s Amanda, and I don’t think we’ll ever completely figure out what was up with her or how she got under Lara’s skin so easily. But Lara bounces back. She always bounces back. I kind of just need to make sure she doesn’t _have_ more things to bounce back from.

The last bit of light from the sun eventually fades, and Lara makes more adjustments to the telescope. I’m not sure I can see anything, but after a few minutes I hear this humming in the air. The heaviness lifts, like how my head always feels after my ears pop.

And it’s like there’s an actual pop that I hear, accompanied by some kind of windchime. Something brushes past me and in the dim starlight I see a young woman. _Setsuko_! She’s beautiful, and when she looks at me her smile could light up a whole room.

There’s a figure waiting outside. Lara and I step onto fallen blossom petals as Setsuko comes to a stop in front of another young woman. They embrace, the newcomer clinging to Setsuko and burying her face in her hair. I’m not sure if we’re supposed to see this private moment, but I can’t tear my eyes away. Lara’s standing next to me. I snake my arm into hers and lean against her.

The second woman breaks the hug enough to look at us with respect and gratitude. Though she looks so young, her eyes are old with decades of experience and my breath catches in my throat. The scene blurs, and when I wipe my eyes and look up again, they’re gone.

Lara’s crying openly, so I lean into her and she presses her face into my hair. “We did good, Lara. We did good.”

Lifting my head, I reached up to wipe at her face. “You know if anything happens, I’ll wait for you. I promise.”

She smiles, and kisses my temple. “And I’ll wait for you.”

**Lara**

It takes a few more weeks after we reunite Setsuko with Natsumi for things to finally start feeling normal. I’ve just been so _drained_. Seeing those two women, happy in each others’ arms for the first time in seventy years did a lot to lift my spirits. I have a few projects to keep me busy once we’re home, and sometimes I’m the one having to drag Sam away from _her_ work instead of the other way around.

The house feels more alive than it used to. Leda is a really wonderful housemate, and about the only person capable of wrangling all of us to actually sit down and eat dinner together. I think Winston is secretly very happy about these arrangements, even though he keeps a stoic face. I’ve invited Jonah to join us whenever he wants, and Reyes has a standing invitation as well. I trust them.

Soraya still needs a lot of recovery time, but she helps me design a new training room. Something to keep me fit, and to continue to train Sam. I joked _once_ about leaving her in charge of the manor while I explore a ruin and she gave me the kind of look that could sink _battleships_. I’m not escaping anywhere without my wife any time soon, or she’ll never let me hear the end of it.

I don’t actually mind. I’m not as worried as I once was. Sam has come such a long way from the scared girl on Yamatai. She still gets scared, but she uses that to fuel her actions. We’ve mourned the girls we used to be. It’s really time to let go and move on.

We take a backpacking trip once Soraya is feeling well enough, and the four of us travel across Europe and back again. No danger, just immersing ourselves in the history and cultures of the continent. Raya and I end up with two notebooks full of potential sites to explore later on. When we get back, I discover that Sam has a surprise for me. It’s really just a pile of parts, but she hands me a tool box and tells me to get to work.

And I obsess over that damn bike. When I’m not working on it, I’m thinking about it, ordering new parts, designing a paint job, talking to Sam about it. She gets this silly, glossy grin on her face when I start to go off on it, but I can’t help it. It feels so _good_ to do something with my hands. Something almost pure, unstained by blood.

I run into too many problems with the motor and order another one. It’s not a new one, and there’ll be some tune-ups required to really make it purr but that’s actually the point. It arrives early one Friday afternoon. Soraya helps me get it into the garage. “I’ll restock the minifridge for you. Just water?”

“Water, thank you, but can you also bring a beer?” 

“It’s going to be one of those days, isn’t it.” She laughs, and squeezes my shoulder before she leaves.

I turn my attention back to the bike. Soraya comes and goes while I’m getting the motor into position. My fingers are covered in grease and oil, and it’s utterly ruined the clothing I’m wearing, but I get it bolted in, then sit back to admire my handy-work. I grab a beer from the minifridge, holding it with a towel. This feels good. I can’t wait for the first test ride. I’m sure Sam can’t wait either - she’s bought me a whole collection of biker wear in her excitement.

I hear a sound to my left and look up. There’s a figure in the doorway, and when she steps inside I recognize her immediately. I shoot to my feet. “Dolma! What are you doing here?” Setting the beer aside and wiping my hands as best as I can with the cloth, I approach her. 

She smiled nervously and fidgets, twisting her hands around a braid. I don’t remember a braid the last time I saw her. It’s a good look on her. “I wanted to come see you. You have my wolf.”

Oh shit. “And here I almost forgot. I’m so sorry. It’s in the manor, I’ll get it for you. But how did you get all the way to England?” Sam? It had to have been Sam. I might have to kill her.

“I bought tickets.” 

“Of course you did. Dolma, you can’t just hop across half the world on a whim.” I have to stop myself from putting my hands in my hair. Instead, I walk over to a sink so I can wash them.

“You would.” The young teenager leans against the sink and smiles at me. From this angle, her face looks remarkably familiar. I study her nose with a sinking feeling in my stomach and a suspicion that I’m not at all ready to confront.

“I suppose I would.” I watch her as she steps away and inspects the motorcycle.

She settles her hands on the seat, then looks back at me. “Are you going to make me go back?”

“Do you want to?”

Dolma shakes her head. “No. I want to be here. I feel like I’m supposed to be here. Can I stay?”

Sam is going to be thrilled, and I’d be lying if I said part of me wasn’t as well. “Of course you can. I can even have someone retrieve your things. Your art.”

“Can I stay with you?” She looks at me with so much hope in her eyes that it breaks my heart. It could be dangerous, but I find myself speaking before I can follow that thread.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” I join her at the bike and crouch next to it. “... do you want to help me with this?”

Dolma nods and sits next to me. I point towards something, explaining how the motor works. I can almost feel the eyes of Roth and my parents on us, but for the first time it doesn’t feel like a weight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's purely a coincidence that I post this last part exactly one year from the first part. It's not coincidence that it picks up threads from those first few chapters. I always intended to start and end on the story of the girl who searched for a star and on Dolma as well.
> 
> So here we come to the end of things. Lara's adventures in my little universe are not over. There's always room for more Swear Jar stories. And there's still that city laid low by eldritch horrors, and she still has her own inner demons to fight. But that's a different story. The artifacts, for the most part, have been laid to rest.
> 
> Thank you for following along with Lara and Sam, and thank you for reading!


End file.
